The Official Transformers ROAST ME Thread!

Discussion in 'Transformers Toy Discussion' started by Shmoptimus Prime, May 15, 2020.

  1. Shmoptimus Prime

    Shmoptimus Prime Za Warudo! TFW2005 Supporter

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    It's ROASTING TIME! You can have your own bots roasted but for now it's time for the big bot himself: MURDER PRIME!

    Some quick rules:
    --Please be as harsh as possible while also adhering to the rules and guidelines of TFW. The figure AND the actual character are fair game!

    --Your bot must be holding an "official" r/Transformers (or similar pretend group) sign, to ensure that no Cybertronians are being roasted without their permission.

    --All Cybertronians MUST BE 18 YEARS OLD OR OLDER. We prefer bots with a couple million years under their belts but these are the rules.

    --Please don't post your own unless you've roasted another bot already, or the bot in question has received a few responses first.

    Now, ROAST ME BITCHES!

    IMG_2622.jpg
     
    Last edited: May 15, 2020
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  2. Scarlet knight

    Scarlet knight Emergency Food Connoisseur

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    This'll be good.

    But how am i supposed to roast a expensive 3rd party figure who looks dang near perfect?
     
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  3. SlagNotSlug

    SlagNotSlug Well-Known Member

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    “We’re a civilization that’s highly technologically advanced. My weapon? A big chunk of metal that I smack things with.”
     
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  4. Shmoptimus Prime

    Shmoptimus Prime Za Warudo! TFW2005 Supporter

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    I'm sure you'll think of something :D  Don't forget his personality and stuff he did in the movies is also fair game!
     
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  5. Hoptimus

    Hoptimus How I roll.

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    Somebody saw a pile of metal shavings and said, "There's our next Optimus Prime!"
     
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  6. Leopold Xerovsky

    Leopold Xerovsky Gobot in disguise

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    He looks like he needs some industrial strength chap stick for those lips.
     
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  7. pokemonsdoom

    pokemonsdoom Got bored and changed it back.

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    What type of idiot dresses as a knight unironically and then have the uncouth taste to add flames upon that fashion? If there was a thing as Weebs for European renaissance fashion. Prime is our M'lady neckbeard dude.
     
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  8. savio-prime

    savio-prime Autobotist

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    "My Autobots... Can repair me... Unless I scan another vehicle, in which I'll be perfectly fine again. Screw Ratchet." ~ Optimus Prime
     
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  9. Leopold Xerovsky

    Leopold Xerovsky Gobot in disguise

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  10. LongarmMagnus

    LongarmMagnus The artist formerly known as Longarm Agnus

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    Name: Murder Prime

    Bio: turns into a semi truck and delivers more Cybertronian deaths than Unicron.
     
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  11. IceCreamCyborg

    IceCreamCyborg Well-Known Member

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    Hasbro designer 1 like: "hey let's over complicate the transformation & half way through it there will be a piece that always sounds & feels like it'll break from applying too much pressure!"
    Hasbro designer 2 "Will it break?"
    Hasbro designer 1 "what do I look I like, a scientist? Who cares!"
     
    Last edited: May 15, 2020
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  12. Nemesis Baser

    Nemesis Baser Rei III is so my mood

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    Your legs are longer than the time primes have when you attend them
    Even with your new body, you weren't able to save Ratchet
     
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  13. Prime77

    Prime77 My sanity has social distanced itself. TFW2005 Supporter

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    How could you not know Sentinel was a traitor? Did you learn nothing from the 80s movie? He sounded just like Galvatron. That should’ve been your biggest clue.

    “How big is the scope on the TR figure of me? Aww, man!”
     
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  14. fschuler

    fschuler Post Count Inflated With Hot Air TFW2005 Supporter

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    Why waste any more time and energy roasting Murder Prime? Bay already turned him into a flaming pile of shit...
     
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  15. Patches

    Patches Well-Known Member

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    Don't worry Prime, no matter how much of a beating you're taking from these roasts, I'm sure one of your many Plot conveniences great allies will come and save you from being butthurt, yet again.
    Which one will it be? Decrepit old Decepticon who's already falling to pieces?
    Or maybe an obnoxious, unemployed, failing human manchild?

    Either way, I'm sure you'll take all the credit for it by spouting some sanctimonious tripe afterwards, bonus points if you then murder the guy who just saved your life! You're our hero!

    Maybe you could use that scope of yours to get a closer look at someone that turns into something actually useful.

    I could guarantee no matter how far you can zoom in, you will still not be able to bring how useful you are to a visible level.

    Seriously, even Chip can roll out better than you can.

    Don't worry though, if we ever run into Shockwave's nasty little cousin Micro-wave, we'll call you.
     
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  16. fschuler

    fschuler Post Count Inflated With Hot Air TFW2005 Supporter

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    ROFL...
     
  17. Maximus Danz

    Maximus Danz Do I ever shut up?

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    How the fuck do you even transform?!?!?


    WHAT EVEN ARE YOU?!?!?!
    Your like if the TR Percepter designer chain-smoked 20 joints in a row, then tried to remake the figure.
     
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  18. IceCreamCyborg

    IceCreamCyborg Well-Known Member

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    this thread is the only thing Murder Prime has ever been a part of that has provided entertainment
     
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  19. marvel b

    marvel b Bearer of the Matrix of Smash

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    Remember, this is the guy that came back from the dead and his first thought was " Let's wear an old guy's corpse and rip another's face off". Of course, I'd do that too if my entire existence is about getting thrown into a dumpster explosion and being declared good enough for the public to see.
     
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  20. pokemonsdoom

    pokemonsdoom Got bored and changed it back.

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    Oh look it's the only attempt a vehicle fuzor, Half truck, half POS,
    You know its a dumb idea to use chrome when Takaratomy the kings of putting unnecessary chrome on figures at the time, said no, but You do you. You moron. Tell me he was based on the IDW version but the toy even half assed that part, He has no weapon outside of his dinky shoulder needle, and is missing his scouter, so he cannot tell us if his IQ is really over 9000.
    His altmode is suppose to be an exploration truck but i assure you the only thing Perceptor will explore is the trash bin if he is lucky, He may explore the pile of mediocre over engineered toys just like Universe 2.0 Ratchet and Ironhide...I hear if you go deep enough you may catch a glimpse of Beast machines Supreme class Cheetor, but even he has more merits and fun value than RTS Perceptor
    Edit: I have more
    Sheldon Cooper has a more tolerable existence than you,
    What can you say about a bot who can scratch his own knees just but lazily dropping his arms down,
    Like a true hollywood scientist, there is nothing fun about him, he tries to make you feel dumb by attempting to act smarter than you in his transformation scheme when in reality he is a giant annoyance.
     
    Last edited: May 16, 2020
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