Back in 1992 i made a friend that became a close friend for several years. she and i were always hanging out and never apart. we were so close her grandparents let her stay with me and i stay with her. my freshman year in highschool she moved and i lost touch of her. i graduated in 1996 and went on with my life. so here n the last year i had been connecting with old friends and decided to look her up. it took some time but i found her. she moved to florida and was convicted of armed robbery and burglary. shes also a registered sex offender because she had sex with a 16 year old when she was 20. this is defnatly not the life i saw her having when we were kids and not even now. I am really down about this and i dont know if i should contact her now. I mean she did her time and is living a somewhat normal life. but still. sigh......

 

Walk away bro.

 

As fast as you possibly can.

 

It doesn't sound like a good situation that you want to get involved in.

 

It's Easier to Run.
-Chester Bennington

 

Happens. I found out a few months ago, a guy I adored in 9th grade is now in jail. The same jail where I did my internship in the probation department! The boy was so smart and funny, I just can't believe it, but apparently he got his hands on some drugs and just started down a dark path.

 

There's nothing to run from OP. It's someone you haven't talked to in years. You either choose to talk to her or not. It's really not as complicated as you're making it out to be. People have downs in life. It doesn't change the reasons why you care about her, and saying hi and seeing hwo things are doesn't make you a burglar or a sex offender. So, I'm not seeing the drawback if it's something you wanna' do.

Also, sometimes it's nice for someone who's down to know people still care.

So, I dunno. Kind of an alt. perspective from the previous responses, but I don't see the harm in reaching out at arm's distance.

 

So, what's she look like?

 

I think she might like to see an old friend again, I think a living memory of her childhood [i.e you] is probably the best chance one will get to see her old self again [it works for me].

Alternatively, she might even be the same person deep down, only scarred in which case she really needs a friend.

Or, she became a monstreous sociopathic burglar, but I don't think that's likely.

I'd contact her, but then again, I suck at giving advices to people.

 

I'd look them up to find out what happened. I always want to know why people end up going down a dark path. If nothing else it might give you a different perspective.

You may not have a whole lot in common anymore, but it's always worth trying to understand where different types of people are coming from and what their outlook is.

Like Overlord posted, it might do her good to relive those days and be reminded of the person she was before she made that series of mistakes. You're not going to turn a person's life around, but little things do help.

 

You don't stand a chance, man. She likes 'em young.

 

Let sleeping dogs lie.

 

Tell that to genozaur

 

yeah, kinda homely.

 

This man has a nice way of looking at things.

 

Why. Why would you bring someone like that into your life. What could possibly be improved by it?

 

I have a close friend of mine who always hung out with me when we see each other. Thing is, she got expelled because she brought drugs to school. I knew she took em and she also hung out with crackheads and the like. she never offers me any nor do I accept. I was always worried what would happen if she got caught. So she was gone from the rest of high school from then on. We still talk and hang out to this day. She always treats me the same but different with things like those.

Who knows, if you rekindle with her, maybe a spark of your friendship will change her for the better. Maybe she would treat you different.
It's all a matter of perspective.

 

If your only interest is to say "hi, how are you" then by all means go ahead. If you are persuing an intimate relationship you should be careful. People who have been to prison like to take advantage of a situation like an old friend reaching out all heartfelt like. If she's on any of the so called "hard drugs" she will move in, rob you blind and leave you pantsless.

 

Depends on if you can keep a rational mind. If you're somewhat weak willed, I would recommend to stay away, as a relationship with her would hurt you both, most likely.

If you can keep control of yourself and draw a strong line, I'd say, go for it. Chances are she needs a friend.

 

Pretty much.

I mean in the worst case, you know that you've tried to help someone who you cared about in the past, and if they shit in your face, so what? I mean, the fact that you're even making a thread lets me know that you care somewhat, so I wouldn't let these "run for cover!" responses change your mind.