Agreed. Where the heck do these people exists, we need to condition them to be normal.

 

That's 100% awesome Nachtsider! I'll keep that in mind if it ever happens to me, those little pricks.

My friend had a Wal-Mart experience a few years back. While not exactly a grocery store per se, Wal-Marts find a way to bring out the worst of the lot. She was at a Wal-Mart in London, Ontario and saw this white-trash looking mother there with her equally trashy teenage daughter. They were on their way out with their purchases when a security guards stops them.

Security: Excuse me ma'am, I believe you have an item in there that hasn't been paid for.
Mother: I don't think so! I'm not a thief!
Security: Then would you mind opening up your bags?

He searches through the bags, and finds a used pregnancy test. It came up positive.
Daughter: Mom! I'm so sorry!!!
Mom: Sorry for what? Shoplifting, or getting pregnant?!

 

 .....where..did she find the time to take the test...  and why didn't she just leave it in the bathroom

 

Well, this one could win the thread for weirdest story.

And I have to admit, I laughed.

 

She was obviously saving it for the baby book.

 

I was at Target a couple months ago... Came walking around the corner of to head down the toy isle, when I noticed a bunch of shit on the floor...and by shit I mean poop... Needless to say, it started at the corner of the Toy Department, lead all the way to the bathroom at the other end of the store. Man...I just want to know if it was a kid or an adult!

 

My first thought was, where the hell do you live that kids come up to you and bite you?! My second thought was best story ever!

But seriously, how f-ed up was she as a parent that her kid ran around biting people?!?!?!

 

Either way, it is disgusting.

 

I think she was waiting to get home for the result to show, don't believe it's instantaneous (I'm not too familier with home pregnancy tests...thankfully)

 

From what I heard, it is a few minutes? I still am entertained by that one commercial for home pregnancy tests. "This will be the best pregnancy tester, you will ever pee on!"

 

Oddly as am I

 

It's just the delivery of the product line...it is shocking, but to the point.

 

Love this story..Nachtsider can share the win with Janitor  

 

My greatest store story is the time I really had to drop a duece. I run into a McDonald's on my way to work around 7:30. Both stalls are out of toilet paper. So I grab a handful of thick brown paper towels from the counter and do my deed. It was a true mud butt experience. I wiped my bum with the paper towels knowing darn well they weren't going to flush. And left. Lol to the idiots that didn't make sure there was enough toilet paper. They probably have to draw straws or something to find out who was the one going to dig out the paper towels out of the beef stew I left them.

 

..... 

 

Poor McDonalds. Always putting up with other people's shit.

 

literally

 

Buzz Killington strikes again. That was why the postnwas funny.

Metaphors used as sarcasm are lost on people nowadays.

 

This thread is made of pure damn win  

I got a few stories from working at Walgreens. Where my Walgreens is, right down the street is the projects, full of druggies and white-trash pieces of shit who just like to start crap for no other reason than from either being on drugs or suffering from withdrawal.

A good 60% of the customers I get during the afternoon shift are people from the projects, the other 30% are elderly/disabled and the remaining ten percent are a mix of people ranging from kids my age to parents in their 30's-40's. The people from the projects (Who I refer to as "Xenos" because they mostly come out at night, mostly) are assholes.

I don't know what it is but if you can't read a sign on a shelf that CLEARLY says what product is on sale in bold print, especially when the product is right above the sign, then GTFO. And then they argue with me at the register and when I prove it that they are wrong they either walk right out of the store and leave their shit at my register or just keep bitching the entire time, as they walk out I promptly flick them off as the next customers in line laugh under their breath and are rather sympathetic and understand the position I'm in.

The other problem I have is with customers who get pissed at me because I don't understand what language they're speaking. The asian hooker who comes in my store every day and purchases a box of condoms I refuse to deal with. I have someone cover my spot at the register and pretend to go to the bathroom until she leaves.

Then there's the "Turtle twins", these two old ladies who are hunched over that walk at .000005 miles an hour and have the worst case of kankles I've ever seen. I don't even think they have feet, their legs look a pair of fingers and sorta flop back and forth in a fluid-motion like there's no bone in them, like a tentacle. They seem pretty nice when you agree with them, but what scares me is that they actually drive.

And there's the guy who smells like piss. Nothing really to say about him, he just smells like piss and the stench lingers there for a while. Nice guy actually he gave me an extra dollar as a tip which rarely happens  

 

year or so ago i was at target i was on crutches (i broke my foot) and some damn kid walked up to me and JUMPED ON MY FOOT AND HIS FREAKING MOM WAS THERE AND DID NOTHING.and the worst part, was i wasnt fast enough to hit the little git in the head