If it works for you. Sounds like you guys got a compromise going, which I think is best. Marriage is about communion, but at the same time you still need to retain your independence to a certain level, at least I know I do. I hope it works out well for you guys.
Thanks guys. We have reached a bit of an impasse now - what to do with the credit cards? I have a good one with lots of available credit, my only one - she has several with a little. We will pay hers off and get rid of most of them, but... I don't think I can put her name on mine, and it would dumb to abandon it entirely - any ideas there? Should I just agree to never use it for anything but us or an emergency?
That gets very dicey for me. I've seen too many people get screwed over because of this. My brother-in-law had a credit card with his former wife. It was just for emergencies. She got another one under both of their names without him knowing. She racked up a ton of debt. They got divorced and she was still using the card. It ruined his credit and he still have collection agencies after him. Same thing happened with my Aunt and Uncle. My Uncle racked up a bunch of debt because he had a gambling addiction. She had no idea. They had to file for bankruptcy and get a divorce to protect her credit in the future. And one more example. When my dad died, he had about 7 grand on his credit card. My mom was not on the card, and therefore, according to Minnesota state law, she was not liable for his debt. Had she been on the card, she would be obligated to pay, and would be hurting financially. We have collection agencies going after my mom even though they are fully aware of this law. As far as all of hers. Pay off the highest interest ones first and cancel them and cut them up. She should only need one really.
You can almost certainly get a second card with her name on it, but I think that this is the best plan you could have. Not just for married folks, but for anybody at all.
As a homeowner you'd be better off with a home equity line of credit than a credit card for emergency credit. That is, if you have at least 10-20K of equity built up. Generally, the home is going to be related to most emergency scenarios anyway, furnace goes out, roof caves in, shit like that. The reason a home equity line of credit is better generally is due to a better rate, plus the interest is tax-deductible.
Definitely for house stuff. I was thinking more along the lines of...well, stuff besides house repairs is all.
sounds like you already know what to do Personally, I have a CC for emergencies, and so does the wife. But we NEVER use it for anything but emergencies.
Sounds like you guys have pretty high fees for your credit cards? I get 55 days interest free for purchases (not cash withdrawals) so I use mine a bit.
You appear to have married a "traditional" wife. My financial arrangement with my wife (of 4 months) has the best of both worlds: 1. My wife still has her private bank account prior to marriage 2. I still have my private bank account prior to marriage 3. We opened a joint bank account 4. The joint account pays most bills such as mortgage, utilities, groceries, and so forth 5. 100% of my paycheque goes to the joint account 6. 50% of my wife's paycheque goes to the joint account 7. I get a $500.00 monthly allowance which I can spend as I please (especially on Transformers). The $ 500.00 goes into my personal bank account. 8. The 50% of my wife's paycheque goes into her personal bank account. She also gets to spend it as she pleases. 9. We do not yet have a joint credit card, but are planning to apply for one 10. I also make more money than my wife. As you can see, our financial arrangement acknowledges our individual privacy and our integration of finances due to marriage. My wife and I had thoroughly discussed the integration of our finances prior to getting married. We came up with this "compromise" or "formula". Hopefully, the description of my family's finances will give you some insight and/or suggestions about how to structure yours with your wife's.
We have joint account that our main jobs go into but we both do easy and unscheduled parttime work on the side. That income usually goes into the accounts we had separately before we got married for the little things we want or need or to surprise for bdays or xmas, but we can also buy little treats out of our joint account as well. we both keep and eye on the account and we discuss big ticket items before purchase. works out just fine and allows us a little privacy if we want it.
I can't be bothered to read the whole thread, but I'll post anyway and hope its helpful. We both have seperate current accounts, we both also have seperate Savings accounts, we both also have a single joint account. Household bills are paid from the joint, and because I have a steady job (my wife is freelance) when I put money in she simply matches it. We both have seperate credit cards, we did have a 'joint' for wedding stuff, but thats been and gone and paid for. Basically our financial situtation is pretty much the same as BEFORE we got married, I personally don't see the need to unify it all officially. Having said that we both consider it to be 'our' money anyway.
Me and my wife could NEVER have a joint account. We make the same money, which sums up to a decent amount, so we help each other whenever we need and we're always making investments together (car, house, kids education, another car), but the money goes in separate bins.
My fiance and I have more or less agreed to keep our own accounts, as well as open a joint account. Joint account, for paying the mortgage, and other shared bills. Individual accounts for our own personal spending needs, she is a doll collector (expensive dolls too.) So neither of us wants one nagging the other about personal spending. We are getting married in a few months, and I hope we can somehow squeeze some savings into there was well. Thinking of setting up an automatic payroll deduction to an additional savings account just for rainy days. I got into this relationship knowing the last thing I want to fight about is money, so just need to find out what will and what won't work.
Out of curiosity ... how much are your monthly fees on those 3 separate bank accounts? Having 1 joint account seems like a smarter way on avoiding money lost to the banks. Tip regarding Credit Cards ... are good and bad to have. But the key to them is that you must ALWAYS pay them off monthly. Either that or you should renegotiate with the card company your interest rate. Most people are unaware that if you simply call them and request a lower rate they will be obligated to give it to you. Sometimes as much as half the posted rate. But even if you do this, I still suggest you pay off these cards via a line of credit which still should have a MUCH lower interest rate. The Credit Card company rates are so high, to try and make it imposible to pay off your debt. That way you are paying the card company forever. Which in the end will put you further in debt. Me and my wife use the credit cards for all our spending. Thus we rack up alot of Airmiles, which we use to get free stuff. It allows us to easily review our spending and who spent what. But the trick is we pay off the bill each and every month, thus never incurring a interest payment. If we are ever short we still pay the bill but would withdrawal funds from our line of credit.
My wife and I have a joint account, plus separate savings accounts. We most of our earnings in the joint account to pay all the bills and save for common projects (house, trips, etc.) but we both keep $100 for ourselves every week for movies, restaurants, personal stuff, etc.
