Facts about Shockwave he'd definately wouldn't want you to know

Discussion in 'Transformers Fan Fiction' started by DerVernichter, Dec 27, 2012.

  1. DerVernichter

    DerVernichter Well-Known Member

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    Sure, our beloved logical Decepticon has quite a few secrets the keep popping up every now and then. His latest revelation can be read in TF: MTMTE #11, and you can be sure there's a lot more where that came from. Some of these secrets deepen the already complex presonality of Shockwave, others show us just how diabolical he can be.

    But what about his more slippery stuff? What about all the information he hides from the world not because of them being crucial parts to his latest schemes, but simply because they're so darn embarassing? Join us, dear forum users, as we descent into the deepest pits of shame!

    Facts about Shockwave he'd definately wouldn't want you to know:


    1. When nobody sees him, he headbangs euphorically to The Logical Song by Supertramp.

    2. He always bursts out in tears while watching the scene of Optimus Prime's death in Thransformers: The Movie.

    3. His greatest desire is to transform into an ice cream car in a summer blockbuster.

    4. Before becoming the Decepticon commander we all know and fear, he was known as Shockbabe, an obscure star of the cyberporn industry.

    5. His original motto was "Dare to be stupid!", which he's excanged with Weird Al Yankovic for his current one at a weed-filled house party...

    6. ...to whom he's still pissed off beyond belief for becoming popular with his slogan.

    7. He has a signed poster of Prowl in his locker.

    8. He's fed up with all the feminists who try to sue him because of the supposed phallic symbol attached to his right whirst.

    9. Strika from Transformers Animated is actually the illegitimate daughter of him and Crasher.

    10. The mutual hostility between him and the Dinobots can be traced back to the time when he was coaching the five autobots for their grammar exam.

    11. His ambition to usurp power from Megatron is not fueled by self interest; it is simply his logic and common sense that dictates him being the most suitable the fill the role of Supreme Commander of all Decepticons... but only after Waspinator, of course.

    12. One of the most humiliating moments of his life was when, after revealing his true colors to Megatron in Transformers Animated, the evil tyrant was so touched by the gesture that he immediately began to sing the epynomous song by Phil Collins. Yes, ol' one eye had to sit it through.

    13. When he feels exceptionally lonely, he fantasises between two deep sighs of meeting a cute femcon who'd transform into a rocket powered gun holster... And he's surprised all those feminists accuse him of being sexist! Shame on you!
     
  2. Stonecrusher

    Stonecrusher Just another Edgelord

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    ...Y'know, I think this'd be more appropiate in the General Discussion or Fanfic forums. It is hilarious, though.
     
  3. Warpshard

    Warpshard Well-Known Member

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    This is in the wrong part of the forums. This would be better suited to rest in the Fan Fiction section. Could a Moderator Please move this thread?
     
  4. DerVernichter

    DerVernichter Well-Known Member

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    Whoops! Sorry, guys, I derped this up big time. I hope I can shed my noob teeth and become a more functional forumbot in the near future. I glad you liked it, Stonechrusher!
     
  5. Andersonh1

    Andersonh1 Man, I've been here a LONG time Veteran

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    I deleted this thread once already. I'll move it to the requested forum.
     
  6. cobracobra

    cobracobra Well-Known Member

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    he is a lady.
     
  7. nobleboivin

    nobleboivin Well-Known Member

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    Laughs. Spews soda from nose
     
  8. xMostWanted559x

    xMostWanted559x Well-Known Member

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    Never knew shockwave was into male robots?
     
  9. DerVernichter

    DerVernichter Well-Known Member

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    @Andwersonh1: Oh, my bad. I thought it was a glitch or something. My threads were never deleted before, so I though I'd get somekind of a notification. I just though "Me topic funny! Thread name funnes! Me put topic to funny name thread! Genius!!!" Stupid me.

    Anyways, sorry for the inconvenience.

    @Cobracobra: And a very classy one on top of that.

    @Nobleboivin: Yummy, what kind of soda were you spewing? Also, happy holidays to you too!

    And wow, what a cool signature you have! That demon\monster\thingy definately knows how to go "GOGOGOGOGO!"

    @xMostWanted559x: Actually I'm quite positive that behind the cold, emotionless interior Shockwave is actually a robotic sex deity, an omnipotential manwhore who spare no ine from his almighty lust and puts even Libido King Omega Spreem to shame. I mean, have you seen Gangnam style featureing the Transformers by ngsmoov? I don't think you can lay with such relaxed badassery below the violently and rapidly thrusting crotch of Megatron without being a true galactic love spreader.
     
  10. SilverBlade

    SilverBlade Well-Known Member

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    When watching hockey, Shockwave routinely routes for Team Canada
     
  11. batmanprime

    batmanprime Omega-con

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    Oh Hell, I suddenly see a whole string of Chuck Norris esque Shockwave jokes coming down the pike.
     
  12. nobleboivin

    nobleboivin Well-Known Member

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    Dr. Pepper and thanks