Dayuuummm that be looking fiiiiine!

 

You have become Heidi

 

Done entirely just to do this...


LIIIIQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHD NAAAAAHHHHHTROOOOOONGEEEEEEEEEEENNNNN!!!*


* = The pinnacle of Freddery's Geewun Redone is that "Ironhide, you know Autobots can't fly!" bit

 

Apparently, part of it is a cheeky nod to the instances of artists getting a bit carried away with the notes from the writer and escalating battle damage from an intended "serious injury" to "Dead. Very dead. So, so, so definitely dead." Which they then miraculously recover from in the next issue.

 

Pfft. Unless you turn black and white, they're not dead. That's what Transformers has taught me.  

They could be reduced to a pinky finger, but as long as it's in colour, he lives!

 

This has cheered me up no end XD.

 

Winning. What does that even look like? I can't even set up a sexcam site properly.

That's a thing of beauty!

Poor Dave! He's had a rough time of it with his health over the last 15 years or so. Fingers crossed for him.

Hot!

AHHHHRRRRNNHYYIIIIIIDE

EYYYYUUUURRRRUUUHNHYDE

URRRNHUIDE

Perhaps even more than Optimus, Megatron, or Starscream, Ironhide was the G1 character whose voice I spent the most time impersonating. Between that voice and the broad characterisation of the 'old tough grumpy guy' Ironhide felt like one of the most fully realised of the G1 cartoon characters. If I think about the cartoon I don't feel like I really know Ratchet, or Prowl, or Gears, but I knew them all so well from the comics. But Ironhide? Yeah, I KNEW that guy from the cartoon.

And perhaps that why his death in TF:TM felt a bit more visceral than any of the other shuttle deaths.

Of course my favourite memory of Ironhide is that scene in Target:2006 where he digs Megatron out of the rubble, battling with the hideous compromise he's being forced to break. Heaveeeeeee. Honourable mention must also go to the verbal he issues to Jetfire in Dinobot Hunt.

And then there was the toy.

Ooooooooooh boy!

Along with Grapple and Optimus Prime himself, Ironhide was one of the Birthday presents I got for my 7th birthday way back in 1985. I'm pretty sure that I played with Grapple and Optimus a whole lot more, but I don't recall hating Ironhide. Quite the opposite. I remember being kind of fascinated by the little platform he sat in, with all it's accessories. And that van mode was a pure gem!

But it didn't look a bit like Ironhide. And I can't pretend that didn't drive me up the wall.

But that's kind of unfair. Or at least we should be blaming Marvel and Sunbow, rather than this poor old toy.

So we all know that Ironhide was originally released as the Diaclone Onebox Cherry Vanette, the second ever Diaclone car robot released. And we all know that Diaclone was all about piloted mecha, and not alien lifeforms that happened to be transforming robots. But when we hold the toy of Ironhide in our hand, how many of us can reconcile that with our frustration about how little it looked like your favourite Cybertonian uncle?

Me definitely, so I'm going to try super hard to evaluate this toy objectively.

I rarely do this, but I'm going to start with the vehicle mode. It's always been my reasonable assumption that the Diaclone stuff was designed with the vehicle in mind first and then the designers would work out how to get a robot to unfold out of it.

The van is lovely. Just utterly lovely. It's a pretty tight, impressive looking thing that rolls along like nobody's business. There's a real tactile pleasure in just handling the toy in this mode and,as it sits here on my desk, I find myself idly rolling it backwards and forwards, like I would a toy car as a kid. And man, does it roll with those rubber wheels!

Then the there's the 'bot mode. There's things about it that are cool. I love the rocket launcher and laser, I love the (somewhat ironic) alien feel of this mode, I love the extra seats for the Diaclone pilots, I love all the detail in the stickers - the reel to reel tape machine on the back of the driver's seat being a particular favourite, and I love that he has a proper little chrome dashboard, but do i think it's objectively a good toy?

No. Not really. The tracks on the sled are a bit crap, and the hind ones pop off if you wink at the sled, the detail and proportions of the robot are horrible however you put it. Those arms are a mess and the 'shoulder' joints are just so slim and flimsy that you can't help but do a double take at it. The legs are equally as horrid, being shapeless stumps. I wanted to give it a chance, acknowledge the historical importance of this mold, and hope that I could see something in it I liked, but I don't want to be a dishonest apologist either.

So, I think it's fair to say that Ironhide has been poorly served by CHUG releases. There's been the Universe version back in 2008 and the Combiner Wars version from 2015, and neither exactly nailed the character. But, truthfully, he's a damn hard character to nail. With the character model deviating so wildly from the toy simple practicalities, like how that robot becomes that van, were things for later folk to worry about it. And maybe they finally solved that problem.

One of the things that Siege has excelled at is representing the character. THAT was Optimus, THAT was Megatron, THAT was Shockwave, THAT was Sideswipe, and THIS is Ironhide. Thirty seconds with this guy in my hand and i'm doing the voice again (I'll spare you a second run at doing the name phonetically, let's acknowledge the will power involved in that). And because this toy nails the character so well I find myself willfully overlooking some issues.

To make this Deluxe stand taller than the rest of his price point buddies, we've wound up with a very hollow and slim figure. Like, if you were the sort of maniac that displayed the figures for an overhead view it would be striking how slender Ironhide seemed for such a beefy character. Don't get me wrong they've dealt with the problem with intelligence and flair, with the hollowness in his legs and chest being handled well, but he looks much less impressive from the side and back than he does from straight on.

But man, I forgive it all because he looks really great. At first I thought Prowl would be the star of the wave two Deluxes, but after spending some time posing this guy I think Ironhide comes out the winner. The camera certainly sees to love him. He's just got real...presence! More than just poseability, the guy kinda commands attention.

And that extends to the 'van' mode too. It's an impressive little chunk Cybertronian vehicle that manages to tuck all the robot away pretty well. well, apart from those bloody arms being oh so painfully visible on the top. I guess the budget kind of ran out at that point. It's a real shame. Particularly as it doesn't stretch the imagination to far to see how this could be reshelled as an earth vehicle.

So, a few little grumble aside, I feel like I'm breathing a sigh of relief to have this dude in hand. I'm glad to pack away my third party placeholder and have something that fits more coherently with the rest of my collection.

 

Sorry Kit, Barry just can't resist my Cam show!
That's some crazy shit with your eyes. Hope they recover soon.

Tis the eternal curse of the the home teams. All it takes is one glimmer of hope, and fans begin believing their going to win the whole tournament!

N. Ireland football is thankfully free of this. As the previous holders of the 'highest number of international games played without a goal' record (and low-key ripping with San Marino for taking that dubious honor away from us) we know we aren't for winning any tournaments. Qualifying for anything major is considered a national victory!  

Fuck, hadn't heard that. I'm not a huge megadeath fan but fingers crossed for him.

My all time favorite instance of this...



Generally I've always taken it as Cybertronians are hard to kill... by humans and other species - and as @DaftRaider notes - few of them are going to die by accident (barring poor Ore who got mashed into a Quantum Engine that time).

I don't know how many times as a kid I passed up Ironhide for something that actually looked like a fun toy. I WANTED an Ironhide. Like you Barry - I spent plenty of time imitating him. But his toy was a bit keck. Between Ironarse and Rat-shit they attached two of the most engaging characters in the cartoon/ comics to the worst toy!

I remember desperately hoping for a Actionmaster version of him. Sure he wouldn't transform, but at least he would look like himself right?

Certainly feels like a threshold has finally been crossed in terms of CHUG figures with Ironhide and the forthcoming Ratchet. Like a 35 year old wrong has been righted.

 

Some more pics from the first in my "MORE THAN MEETS THE ISO" series for TFSource. Link in my sig below.  

 

Wow, what surgery did you have?

 

@bcm77 best wishes for Oreo - hope all goes smoothly.

@barry love the Ironhide write up. Yeah I always wished the toy was more like the cartoon, the vans were sublime but the bots not so... itch was scratched by the MPs, I feel more attached to Ironhide and Ratchet because I remember how crap their G1 Bot was!!

@tikgnat I couldn’t help but imagine you with eyes similar to Louis Tully in Ghostbusters post dog of doom intervention! Hope you are back to full capacity soon  

 

It wasn't until Graham posted on Twitter to say that TFN was 8 weeks away that I really had to make a decision about attending this year - just too many expenses on the apartment recently.......but flights are now sorted! See you all in August!

All the best
Maz

 

Thanks!

Not sure if he'll have a cone on his head, if he does I can see it being a struggle to keep it on as since I first got him he's always been a bit jumpy when anyone touches his head which I've put down to something that happened when he was abandoned before the rescue centre found him. He's gotten better as time's gone on as he trusts us but it depends on his mood and it's not worth pissing him off as although he's way more laid back than Rebecca his teeth are even sharper and it hurts like hell even when it's a small nip.

@Brum Bot,
Thanks!

 

Courtesy of the rather nice @bagofshhh we have a good idea how how big Springer is compared to the other Siege guys. Very happy to see he isn't towering over Optimus.




Also if Impactor is going to be Ironhide-ish height, we can see the difference in size there might be between the Wrecker leaders. I'm good with it. I mean I'd prefer they stood eye to eye, but can't have everything!

 

For the record, I kinda liked G1 Ratchet. Loved how his long gun was hidden under his ambulance mode.

I always had him with his medical bay on his back but with his arms and feet out, and the medical bay could come out if required.


Thoughts on Siege Magnus, transporter mode is a bit crap. Robot mode is pretty awesome. Do I like partsformers? NO. Do I like how there is the white robot with the armour that can clip on, hell yeah! Reminds me of the DW armour busting pic

 

He looks like he'd be about Prime's height if he wasn't standing like Lord Flasheart! WOOF!  

 

YOU.

*points finger accusingly*

You want to know what the most amusing thing was? When I got the name of the site in question, I typed it into my browser while my missus was in the room. Whups.

@Convoy, that CHUG Ironhide listing is hilarious. I don't think the toy is that bad... but compared to the Siege release... yeah. It's not as good.

@Liokaiser1989, 3rd generation laser eye surgery, otherwise known as SMILE. In as small a nutshell as possible...

I wear glasses, ever since I was 6 or 7. Around -5.00/-2.50 x 180 per eye. Glasses with hi index lenses cost around £200/£300 a pair. My latest pair got broken a few months ago, so I thought now I would seriously pursue laser eye surgery, something I'd been thinking about for years. So I did the consults etc with the glasses held together by Gorilla tape.

1st gen laser eye ops sound horrific (they melt the top layer of your eye with alcohol, peel it off then shape the exposed bit with a laser. Then they attempt to put the melted layer back (not usually sucessful) so instead they put a contact lens bandage on and wait for that top layer to grow back. Takes weeks to get decent vision back.

2nd gen, they slice around the cornea making a flap. They then laser correct the exposed area, and then stick the flap back. In the old days they used to make the flap cut with blades. Fuck no. It's lasers today though. Disadvantage to this is that flap will always be weak, if you get knocked in the eye too hard the flap could dislodge. Considering I do martial arts, nope.

3rd gen, Smile. They focus the laser underneath the cornea, then squeeze out the excised tissue through a <2mm hole they make. So the only surface damage is that <2mm slice. Took 10 minutes for BOTH eyes.

Cost around £2500 per eye, but thanks to a friend of an employee discount (20% off) works out at a mammoth £1000 savings. Vision is much better but not perfect. Individually the eyes are not quite 20/20 vision, but together I can see one line better than 20/20. Still a bit cloudy/hazy, but actually, looking at my screen right now it's not nearly as hazy as it was yesterday.

@Maz, awesome news about your TFNing!

Speaking of TFN, without glasses I have to work out a way to attach the head light I used last year to look in the ground level boxes. In another nutshell...

TFN hall is ALWAYS DIM. Can't see the toys in the boxes under the tables (or even on the tables). I brought along a €1 reading light that attaches to glasses to help me see. Don't care that I look like a berk, cuz I don't care much about anything. Turns out a side effect of the pure white LED is it shows up any yellowing plastic on vintage toys! So yeah, I'm deffo gonna bring it again... but as I say, need to work out a way to use it hands free.

Nobody say staples.

 

To each their own brother! I would say I did like the notion of the sled/ base thing - particularly for Ratchet as I could imagine it as a little operating table he might take with him. Certainly loved that Energon Tow-line homaged it (love that figure). It's a shame the Ironhide/ Ratchet repaint of Tow-line where Botcon exclusives.

He certainly rocks the stance.

I'd like to hop into Springers Helicopter mode and take him to heaven and back five times a day  

Thanks for the fresh nightmare fuel!