This is sound advice, accept and move on, no matter how bad it hurts, if it hurts of course, this step allows for continuance in other relationships if any are wanted, don't become bitter or do anything foolish that might affect the rest of your life badly, just accept and move on.

 

Good man.

 

Got an atrractive woman interested and ofcourse im scared shitless. I built scaffold staring death in the face everyday. Been familiar with quite a few women in my time And now im scared? My ex broke me  

 

Put on a blindfold and imagine she's homely.

 

Lol its not the atrractive part that scares me. But ill hold on to the blindfold idea  

 

Hey guys, gonna post a story.

Ok, i had the best girlfriend/fiance i could ever ask for, we were together for almost two years, but at times i could be a jerk(not a true horrible horrible one, i did shove her away from me once tho) she is 7 years younger then me but that didn't matter, the most beautiful girl i've ever laid eyes on. We have a 7 month old son together as well(looks just like his papa at that age ^.^ ) in august i was backing out of the drive with her stepfathers pickup and broke a mirror off(gotta give that thing gas or it won't even budge, silly rigged manual trans thing) and that was the end, went to pay a bill, came back and was kicked out for good, was living with her, her mother and the stepfather for over a year then that happened, even after i got myself in over 3k debt to help them out and move a bunch of times(all of us got kicked out of two places before that -_- not my fault, trust me ) exausted myself multiple times cause i was the only one who could do much physical things at a lot of the points in that time, did what was asked of me without complaining but still ended up getting thrown away like garbage.

After that my coworkers at the job i had at the time helped me out a lot and my supervisor even found me a place to live on my own, course i came to find out that a day or two after i was kicked out my ex messaged my mother on facebook saying i ran off with another woman and three kids( i still don't know if she thinks that or made it up herself) and then september came, would have been our two year anniversary of being together on the 4th, instead i was in a courtroom hearing some truths(my jerkiness) and a whole bunch of lies, all used to get a restraining order held on me(my supervisor took me there, she really was like a second mother for me) after that i was pretty dead inside(still am) lived alone for three months, just trying to keep working and keep myself together, ended up quitting my job and coming home to rest(none of my coworkers at the nursing home blamed me for deciding such either, we're all supportive and a few i consider close friends and family like even)

Yet now, even now, i know she's been missing me and wanting to fix things(we are one, i don't if anyone here believes in soul mates but i do, and we are) playlists on her youtube channel, status posts and pics shared on facebook tell me this, but i don't know exactly what she thinks happened or who'es all to blame, in ways we've been sending indirect messages by status updates and playlist songs but still i just don't know, and to be honest after all this it feels as if it was all planned before our son was even born, i am to blame in a small part for being a jerk and an ass a few times, and while i do blame her a bit i haven't been angry at her herself, just her parents, which i've always kind of suspected she was a puppet to her mother(sounds bad i know) i just didn't think anything like this could happen.

Maybe one day if we truly are what we think we are she'll find a way to break free and come back, i know damn well that i have changed and would be a lot better to her, but at the same time, it would honestly take a lot for me to fully trust her again..

Bleh...

Currently trying to find work here at home with no luck as of yet(oh yeah, all of my action figures, tfs, mls, gundams etc are still in KY with them, pretty much everything i owned is x.x ) maybe one day i'll even get to see my son again, no matter what i'm going to try to at least fight for visitation(he's honestly the only reason i'm still alive, was going to do something very stupid in october but he popped into my head)

Anyway, thanks for reading guys and gals.

Alphaprime/Zach

 

^ I hope it all works out for you brother and that you and your son are reunited.

 

Seconded

 

Keep you're head up n keep at it. I went through a similar situation. Nosey opinonated mother in laws suck. Mine was the worst she was mean to my kids. I really started to lose faith in anything i couldn't understand how someone that mean could go through life without repercussions then an off duty beat the living hell out of her. Broken arm broken ribs and she is nowhere near my kids   keep fighting alphaprime

 

I just bitched out my friend for trying to set me up with her bi/gay friend. Do not pull that crap around me. Just because I am bi doesn't mean crap. This isn't gay matchmaker game

Now she is all upset, maybe because I wanna explore females more?

Men are a dime a dozen anyways.

 

Thanks guys for the support ^.^

Sometimes i wanna hear her say why she betrayed me and then give her Optimus' line from DOTM

"You didn't betray me, you betrayed yourself" Gosh he gets all the best lines in those movies.

 

School just started. Everything's great. Teacher's are mostly awesome, classes are awesome and it's been great seeing everyone after the holidays.

Nothing's changed too significantly, but one thing. I used to sit with this girl, we were best friends, and we'd talk everyday. End of the year, my persistence won her over, we went on a couple of dates. Then she decided she didn't have feelings for me anymore. No reason. She said it herself, she has no idea why. Then we didn't talk for a month afterwards and I tried talking to her just before school. She didn't seem very happy to hear from me again. She blamed it on being in a bad mood, because she'd just got back from a trip to her home country, and apparently she's always in a bad mood. So I didn't think much of it. She said we could still sit together in class, we just didn't have to arrange to. I thought, "Ok, whatever, at least she wants to talk still."

Next day, first day of school, there's a spare seat beside her in one of the classes. I thought, "What the hell" so I sat there. Said hello. She barely whispered hi back and didn't say a word to me again. Hasn't said a word to me since. I messaged her about it later and she blamed the bad mood again, but she looked very happy with everyone else. She said "I'm sorry, I guess, you're still my friend." Well, how can I be her friend if she won't even make an effort to talk to me.

So, last year we were best friends, and now she won't even bother trying to talk to me. She insisted I'm still her friend but her actions prove otherwise. I expected this, but it still sucks. I'm so disappointed that she won't even try. I've been in this situation before, but she made me believe it wouldn't be like that with her. Between just ending what we had (not a relationship, but not too far off. Her condition when we started dating) for no other reason than "I stopped liking you like that because I don't know" and now just ignoring me after insisting that we could be friends...argh.

I apologise if this is incoherent, I just needed to get this out. More of a rant than asking for advice, but if you have any don't be shy. I don't think there's anything I can do either way.

Also, I'm really sorry to hear what's happened with you and your fiance AlphaPrime. I hope things work out soon, you seem like a decent guy and you deserve better than that.

 

Let me put it to you this way, Ironhide1706. Your friend didn't want to date you, but you pressed the issue. Where you see "winning her over with persuasion", she probably saw things as "badgered me into submission". And so she eventually relented and went out on a few dates with you, which cemented how she already felt, that she REALLY didn't want to date you. When she told you she didn't have feelings for you anymore, she probably meant that she never really had those feels for you, but gave you a shot out of a sense of obligation or exasperation. And now her perception of you has changed. She very possibly sees you as someone who was only interested in dating her, and not particularly interested in what she wanted (at least, not when it didn't coincide with your own interests). And that's a pretty damning way to look at someone, either as a partner or as a friend. She could very well not have interest in being your friend because she doesn't think you've been a good one to her, and doesn't want to have to put up with your "persuasion" again should you decide to try down the road.

Long story short, you burnt your bridge with her by effectively forcing the issue of dating, and now you have to deal with the consequences of it.

 

I didn't mean it like that. She did feel the same way. She told me she did, multiple times. Yes, I was persistent, but she told me that was a good thing. She told me a lot of things.

But you're probably right. I wouldn't be surprised if that's how she feels.

Thank you for being honest. I needed that.

 

Haha, wise words right there. If my GF wasn't raging, it'd be the perfect thing I'd like to say to her.

 

I keep thinking that I didn't explain it properly in my first post, but perhaps I explained it perfectly. I remember telling her to do what she wanted, even if that meant hurting me, but now that I really think about it, I might have accidentally made it so that she felt she couldn't pick the option that would hurt me, for whatever reason.

The idea that she just lied to me that whole time...I don't know what to think about that.

I thought I was putting her feelings into consideration, but as I said earlier, perhaps I unintentionally didn't. I think the hardest part now will be seeing her every day and being reminded of that. Ironically, we're in more classes together this year than we were last year.

At least she might be moving later this year. She's from NZ and desperately wants to go back. I'd like to think I would have supported her wholeheartedly if things had worked out, but now I'm not so sure.

 

My advice for you now is to let it go. Stop thinking about her and trying to figure her out. You will never know what's actually going on in someone else's head, so trying to replay events and analyzing her thoughts and actions is a bit of a waste of time and energy. Take this as a learning experience and just let the whole thing go. You will benefit greatly from this way of thinking in other relationships.

 

Any advice on how to let go? I know time heals all wounds and all that, but if there's an effective, quicker way, I'd love to hear it.