I decided to do a parody of the Chuck Norris facts, using Whirl.

-You ever wonder why Gobotron looks even worse than Cybertron? Whirl was testing some new weapons, and he thought he saw a Spark Eater while drunk on Nightmare Fuel......

 

Whirl is the original Cybertronian psycho:
"There are no more barriers to cross. All I have in common with the uncontrollable and the insane, the vicious and the evil, all the mayhem I have caused and my utter indifference toward it, I have now surpassed. My pain is constant and sharp and I do not hope for a better world for anyone; in fact, I want my pain to be inflicted on others. I want no one to escape, but even after admitting this there is no catharsis, my punishment continues to elude me and I gain no deeper knowledge of myself; no new knowledge can be extracted from my telling. This confession has meant nothing."

 

Whirl only has one eye, but 20/20/20 vision.

 

Whirl is so flipping awesome...Chuck Norris goes to him to ask for advice on being over used.

 

Whirl makes Overlord pee on his bed at night.

 

Every time Whirl says "Killmaster", a Harry Potter fan clenches his anus.

 

  Great responses so far!

Whirl is so crazy-awesome, he beat Cthulhu at a staring contest.

 

Whirl's innermost energon can cure corrosive cog disease.

Whirl once challenged Shockwave to a face off. Whirl won.

Whirl won a staring contest with a mirror.

Whirl's accuracy is so good that his shot could orbit a planet and hit himself in the back of his own head. His agility is such that he could catch the bullet with his teeth. This is his usual morning.

The Necrobot once tried to put Whirl's name on the list. She has vowed to never again attempt such an act.

 

The Decepticons tell stories about the Phase sixers around campfire. Phase sixers tell stories about Whirl.

 

Whirl once won a Unicron lookalike contest.

 

For some, Dark Energon is a terrible corruptive force that dominates and destroys everything it touches.

For Whirl, it makes a good flavouring for his drinks.

 

If you were to look inside whirl's head, you wouldn't find a brain module.

Only a fist.

 

When Whirl blinks, Angels run away.

 

Whirl is the second true Matrix bearer... the Matrix of Awesomeness, that is.

 

Megatron had to make up a fancy excuse for Dark Energon being 'plucked from cosmic shores' simply because he didn't want to admit 'this shit was really hard to find'.

Whirl can pinpoint Dark Energon deposits lightyears away without even trying.

 

Prowl set up Whirl on the events that led him to departing Cybertron on the Lost Light out of fear... and because he knew the crew would need protection from Overlord.

 

There are only 3 certainties in life - death, taxes and Whirl.

 

Whirls shits dark energon.

 

Unicron exists in the IDW Universe, he's just too scared to show up because Whirl is there.

Chuck Norris wears Whirl pajamas.

Underneath Whirl's optic is another gun.

 

Whirl could end Cyclonus anytime he wants. He doesn't because he likes the conflict between them.