I review every Transformers G1 episode ever..

Discussion in 'Transformers General Discussion' started by Vector Squidma, Jan 12, 2010.

  1. Tigertrack

    Tigertrack Back In The Game!

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    Why do we care about such details anyway? LOL!
     
  2. Pravus Prime

    Pravus Prime Wields Mjolnir!

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    That one is easy, because he's the only person on Earth who can ask any Autobot to take him anywhere for any reason or do him any favor and they say, "Sure thing Spike!". Want to go to the moon? Another planet? Race around in a sports car? Enter a world rally tournament? Win a DJ competition?

    He's also the only person who's really integrated into the society of the high tech race of shape shifting machines with firepower and technology to manipulate entire solar systems. Heck, he's even been one of them for a while!

    If you apply any sort of reality check, you'd realize that Spike was the most important human on Earth. Something no King, no millionare, no genius could attain. That and it was pretty clear she was really into him. After all, most women who have their car vaporized on another planet and have to flee for their lives either are never seen again or are with you for life.
     
  3. Vector Squidma

    Vector Squidma Smalltime Casual

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    Five Faces of Darkness, Part 5

    Plot Summary: We pick up with the Decepticons assaulting Cybertron. The Autobots put up a valiant defense, but with the defense system knocked out they are forced to retreat to the underground. The Quintessons still hover over the planet, gloating the whole while.

    On Earth meanwhile the Decepticon battle platform is still rolling towards the Ark. Warpath and his cadre of Autobots open fire, but the platform transforms into the massive Godzilla-Bot TRYPTICON! Warpath activates the defense systems, but Trypticon merely brings down the volcano on top of them, crushing the Ark under tons of rubble. With his first target destroyed, he turns his attention to Autobot City...

    Back on Io, Sky Lynx arrives and swoop down to sa-

    Okay...hold on a second...I want to pause the review here. I have a question WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY SMOKING WHEN THE CAME UP WITH SKY LYNX?!? Okay, let me explain. Sky Lynx turns into a space shuttle, well sort of. He turns into the top half. But that's not the weirdest part. Instead of having a normal robot mode, he turns into a fucking scary Wyvern-Shark-Bird thing! But THAT'S not the weirdest part! He also has this giant blue box growing out of his stomach like some kind of mechanical tumor! BUT THAT'S NOT THE WEIRDEST PART!!! The tumor turns into a GIANT BLUE KITTY CAT. How the hell did the cat get there? Is it his Siamese twin? Is it some sort of parasite? Is Sky Lynx...is he...FUCKING THE CAT?!? Okay...clearly Sky Lynx is the product of a warped and insane mind. Henceforward Sky Lynx shall be referred to as "The Abberation".

    So anyways, The Abberation arrives from the blackest nether regions of the void to save Blurr and Wheelie. But right before he takes off, the Predacons warp in! No, not the Beast Wars Predacons, the old school combiner team! They merge into the mighty Predaking, and begin kicking the everloving crap out of Blurr and Wheelie, but The Abberation works his blasphemous magiks upon Predaking, splitting him back into his component parts. The Abberation subsumes Blurr and Wheelie into his squamous, ichor filled womb, and spirits them back to earth on ebon wings wrought from the screams of dying babies.

    Back on Cybertron Galvatron orders Blitzwing to report back to the Quintessons. He arrives on their ship and overhears them plotting to use a team of Sharkticon Commandoes to activate a switch deep within the bowels of Cybertron that will shut down all Transformers in the galaxy! Blitzwing returns to warn Galvatron, but Galvatron just punches him in the face. Blitzwing realizes his only option is to ally with the Autobots.

    Back on Earth The Abberation vomits forth Blurr and Wheelie from his acidic nine-tongued maw, and they manage to install the cog. Metroplex transforms, and he and Trypticon square off in the most poorly animated Kaiju battle ever. Metroplex manages to get the upper hand and hurls Trypticon into the ocean, where he sinks into the abyss.

    On Cybertron Rodimus and Blitzwing halt the Sharkticon commandoes. But Galvatron in all his craziness arrives at just that instant and decides to pull the switch anyway. The Transformers all shut down and the Quintessons emerge out onto Cybertron to gloat some more. But Spike grabs Rodimus's gun and blows the switch back on. Galvatron reactivates and chases the Quintessons right off the planet. He turns on Rodimus but Blitzwing pulls his gun on him and orders him to stop. Galvatron banishes Blitzwing from the Decepticon ranks, and the Decepticons retreat. Rodimus give a speech to the other Autobots, and tells them that they may have just met their greatest foe...

    Comments:

    -Theres no comments today. Why? I was about to post the review and I highlighted it in order to copy and post it to the other forums I post these two, missed the control key, and managed to replace my entire review with the letter "C". This is the second time I have written this review. I hope you guys appreciate all the crap I go through for you. :p 

    Score: Well I love the epic scale of this episode and the precedent it sets for the rest of season 3, but two things weigh it down for me. One, the origin of the Transformers is rather generic. But it's not really a dealbreaker. The main sticking point is the HORRIBLE animation quality. The animators JUST. DIDN'T. CARE. So in short, nice and epic, but not perfect. 7/10.
     
  4. Insane Galvatron

    Insane Galvatron is not insane. Really!

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    In later episodes when you see Octane, keep in mind that it was supposed to be Blitzwing as a result of this episode. But Hasbro wanted the new triplechanger pushed, so Blitzy got replaced. Kinda sucks cause Blitzwing's character was about to get some good development, but instead we get a new "traitor" with no explanation other than he just says he was.
     
  5. Pravus Prime

    Pravus Prime Wields Mjolnir!

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    FYI, Sky Lynx is one of those toy molds that vastly predate Transformers and even predates Diaclone and Microman. He doesn't adhere to norms because when he was created there were none.

    I'll leave a response on the majesty of Sky Lynx to other, more passionate participants.
     
  6. Tigertrack

    Tigertrack Back In The Game!

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    So if Sky Lynx isn't (originally) A Diaclone, or Transformer, then where the hell did he come from? Voltron?
    I never understood that character either. By the way, I think his animal mode is supposed to be a, uh, how do you spell that big Dinosaur bird thing? Tyradactcal?
     
  7. X-Brawn

    X-Brawn Well-Known Member

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    Just like in God Gambit where they replaced Megatron with Astrotrain.

    Read that again: They replace MEGATRON with ASTROTRAIN. You know, the Decepticon who can talk to trains?
     
  8. grimlock1972

    grimlock1972 Optimus, serving up the primest of ribs since 1984

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    Sky Lynx was created by the ToyBox company the same company that gave us Omega Supreme.
     
  9. UltraMagnus3786

    UltraMagnus3786 That's what it is

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    these tidbits are very interesting. I never knew until now, and you know what they say about half the battle...
     
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  10. Obsidian X

    Obsidian X Dork of the moon

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    Funny description of Sky-Lynx ^^

    A far as I can remember Sky Lynx was described as a "dino-bird" (from another planet one must presume?). The blue cat part of him is obviously a lynx.
    The two parts shares the same spark/are the same being.

    Be prepared for more crappy animation! I love this season but I'm sad to tell you that maybe 60% of this season is animated by AKOM :( 
     
  11. Vector Squidma

    Vector Squidma Smalltime Casual

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    The Killing Jar

    Plot Summary: We begin IN SPACE, where a Quintesson scientist is cruising around in his ship, spying on Ultra Magnus as he does so. In the name of SCIENCE, he decides to abduct Ultra Magnus and perform experiments on him. He does this by cloaking his ship in a form resembling the phantasmal carapace of The Abberation, and luring him on. As soon as Ultra Magnus boards he is attacked by an illusory Rodimus Prime, as the Quintesson watches and notes any programming quirks that come up. He flies to Chaar, Earth, and Junk and repeats the process with Cyclonus and an illusory Galvatron, Marissa and an illusion of her father, and Wreck-Gar and a holographic...clown...um...yeah...

    Once all four captives have entered the ship, the walls separating them vanish and allow them to communicate. The scientist enters and deactivates the bars on Marissa's cell but pins her to the ground with a "submission beam", which forces her to assume the Party Submission Escort Position. Wreck-Gar fires his hand through the bars and hits the switch for the beam, allowing her to attack the scientist. She overcomes her captor and attempts to free Ultra Magnus, only for the ship to begin sparking and crackling with electricity. With nobody at the helm, the ship has flown into an electron storm!

    The two Quintessons rush back to the control room and manage to get the ship back on course, while Ultra Magnus shorts out the bars of his cell and frees the others. He and Cyclonus begin to bicker over where to take the ship, but Marissa just makes a beeline for the control room, overpowers the Quintesson, and sets a course for Earth.

    Too bad they've blundered into the gravitational field of a black hole. Whoops.

    Marissa informs the others while the scientist runs to the back of the ship and tries to activate an escape pod, only for Ultra Magnus to yank him out. The others argue over who should use it, but with the countdown already started the pod ends up launching with nobody in it, causing the room to depressurise and yanking Ultra Magnus out into space.

    Cyclonus saves Ultra Magnus with a tractor beam, saying that there is no honor in letting one of his greatest foes perish out of combat. Just then the ship picks up a radio transmission from what turns out to be a derelict spacecraft, which sails past them into the black hole. Finally, the engines of the Quintesson ship overload, and they plummet into the void...

    Rather than being compressed to an infinitely small point though, they find themselves in a negative universe where everyone has been given a repai-I mean the color spectrum has been altered. They all donate some of their parts to help repair the engine, and the ship rockets back through the "white hole", and the ship manages to ninja kick the laws of physics right in the face as it escapes from the black hole. As the emerge Ultra Magnus radios the Abberation for help, who clutches the ship in his obsidian talons and carries Ultra Magnus, Wreck-Gar and Marissa back to Cybertron, as the others flee for their respective homeworlds.

    Comments:

    -Is is just me or does Unicron's head have a really dopey smiling expression on it during the opening shot? By the way, Unicron's head keeps changing size. It's really annoying. More and more I'm hoping he makes it into TF3 so we can see "planet robot" done right. Here he's more often like a "Robot maybe the size of a county at best".

    -I love Ultra Magnus's "Count of One" line. Badass.

    -Yes Wreck-Gar, getting into the spaceship with the clown is such a good idea. Because all clowns can breathe in space.

    -Normally I would point out that there is no way in hell anyone could survive falling into a black hole, but then again, nobody has ever fallen into a black hole in the first place.

    Score: This episode felt more like an episode of Star Trek than Transformers, but I still liked it. It's always nice to see the writers going out on a limb and trying something new rather than writing another "Megatron attacks a hydroelectric dam" episode. Still, I wish more had actually HAPPENED. 7/10.
     
  12. UltraMagnus3786

    UltraMagnus3786 That's what it is

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    Hey man, those dams were built to be plundered.
     
  13. Sorrow Six Star

    Sorrow Six Star 3 2 1 Countach!

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    I need to watch this again because I watched before I was told that Marissa's father was Flint from G.I.Joe.
     
  14. grimlock1972

    grimlock1972 Optimus, serving up the primest of ribs since 1984

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    Scotty might not be able to change the laws o' physics! but the Transformers seemingly can!
     
  15. Rodimus Primal

    Rodimus Primal Well-Known Member

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    While Galvatron doesn't do that, he does seem to be leading the Decepticons a LOT better after Webworld and the Decepticons start coming back into the front after the first half of Season 3 is mostly Quints as villains.
     
  16. Sorrow Six Star

    Sorrow Six Star 3 2 1 Countach!

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    Primal! Don't spoil the reviewer!
     
  17. Tigertrack

    Tigertrack Back In The Game!

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    I find it ironic that in the cartoons, Megatron always attacked damns, yet in the first 2007 movie, he was captured and hidden in Hoover Dam! :D 
     
  18. bouncing boy77

    bouncing boy77 Syntax Error

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    i know what you mean man! the irony of things, megs had it coming i guess as the writers decided to do that in the 1st movie! :lol 
     
  19. Pravus Prime

    Pravus Prime Wields Mjolnir!

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    What really bugs me about this episode is that Cyclonus doesn't just transform into his SPACESHIP mode and fly himself home. Seriously, how is the escape pod not a major step down from Cyclonus' alt mode?
     
  20. Insane Galvatron

    Insane Galvatron is not insane. Really!

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    I think it had to do with the amount of fuel needed to propel himself that far. He'd run out of energy before he made it all the way there.