Some of you might recall my posting in the thread for TFA S1 DVD reviews where I collected media reviews from around the web, and the last one at the time I thought was one of the worst TF-related reviews ever written.

I stand corrected.

Try this one on for size:

This review is bad for a whole lot of reasons, but what's most amusing (and annoying at the same time) is out of the 87 times the phrase "transformers DVD collection" is used, the writer never once specifies WHICH @#$%ING COLLECTION it is.

We readers are left to figure that out on our own.

 

Aside from random weird stuff such as "Autobots vending machine the Decepticons", "they have an advantage carpet rug amp; upholstery cleaners the Decepticons" etc., which reads like someone translated a text from a foreign language via Babelfish (plus the broken HTML tag amp , the weirdest part is Megatron, who "can take on the form of a robot, a carpet steam cleaner moving dragster, or a jet". Er... Cybertron Megatron? Wuh?

But it's 98 episodes, so it's G1? Wah?

 

Yeah, it's not hard to see that he's talking about G1. The rest? kay.

 

I'd always wondered why Megatron's carpets were so spotless.

 

We shall destroy the dustmites and claim steam-cleaned carpet victory!

 

Not horrible, just bad.

And it's obvious what collection it is.

 

What's with all the carpet mentions?

 

Wait...does he think Blitzwing is Megatron? Or is this a series other than G1?

 

I'm confused...

 

WTF

Megatron a triple changer?

 

I guess some of you are missing the point. Two TF DVD collections have been released in the last month, and the movie was reissued as well. So if this reviewer had any kind of functioning brain, he or she should have made some effort to clarify for the general public what "transformer DVD collection" he or she was referring to.

If you write reviews that are published so the public can read them, the actual product title should be mentioned somewhere in there at least once.

It's only obvious to US what collection it is because we're fans and we picked up on what few actual factual details the reviewer offered. But your average consumer wouldn't know what the @#% he was talking about.

Hell, I'm still not sure what the @#$% he was talking about. Just the fact that the page header says "Upholstery Cleaning Movies" makes me wonder what kind of insane person wrote this article.

 

  ...Okay?

 

people people this is easy he owns stanley steamer and is using subliminal advertising

 

 

Does the site seem like a legit site? It might be set up for some kind of elaborate scam involving carpet cleaning services, and the scammer just trawled random 'Transformers DVD' reviews and copy-pasted that.

That or that was written by a sentient carpet-cleaning program.

 

A-HA

This appears to be the original review. Still somewhat inane, but the weird carpet-cleaner stuff is missing.

And it appears there are other versions that replace carpet cleaning with colorado real estate, window shutters and idaho water parks.

Basically, this appears to be a genuine crappy review used by several spam sites that replace random words with product-related spam keywords.

 

Interesting. Nice detective work.

How bizarre the lengths that spammers will go to to pimp their products and/or services.

 

No, what we can work out because we're fans is that he's talking a load of bollocks.
Considering he seems to have mixed in elements of Cybertron (Megatron being a triple changing dragster jet) with G1 ('back to the beginning', 98 episodes etc), and possibly other series I didn't notice, it's basically obvious that this monkey just doesn't have a clue.

I tried the link and it doesn't seem to want to load, but I wouldn't be surprised if the carpet cleaner vending machine references are random advertising links that some stupid sites throw in the middle of the text to get you to notice them.