*chuckle* found this on ATT. Pretty funny, even if you like Action Masters (I do!)
Btw, you might want to have the song playing while you're reading it. Some parts don't seem to fit if you're just reading them, but if you're listening to the song, you'll see that the author is actually very true to the original lyrics.
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A Hasbro Executive talking to one of the design and concept men.
Sung to the Tune of "Dare to be Stupid"
"We Must be Stupid" (New Lyrics by Miroslav Brkic)
Put down that Hot Rod and listen to me.
It's time for us to screw up the line!
It's time to drop this "Robots that change into race cars."
It's time to stop this transforming Prime.
You better knock off all of these gimmicks.
You better quit all of these neat sub-groups.
You better...come out, with something dumb.
You better make the Trans-fans all fly the coup.
You better think of something really lame,
While Mr. Hasbro's not around.
Wreck a really great idea, and then avoid the blame.
doo doo doo doo doo doo doo...doo doo doo doo doo doo doo...
doo doo doo doo doo doo doo...tinkle tinkle tinkle tinkle
Give them changing weapons.
Jazz will have a skateboard.
It will change into a sword.
We'll make fans bored.
We must be stupid!
Take Headmaster Zarak.
Give him bending hip joints.
Make him twice as big now.
Don't ask me how.
You know we must be stupid!
You can give Starscream a bike.
You can give Soundwave a bat.
You can make a laser cannon that transforms into a cat.
We must be stupid!
You know that we must be stupid. <Transformers that don't change>
Scare the hell out of you. <Transformers that don't change>
Make the fans wanna sue. <Transformers that don't change>
Let's run!
It's time to put an end to hard transformations.
Our toys should not require skill.
If you want your kids to have a puzzel-toy,
Rubik's Cube should nicely fit the bill.
Does Huffer really need to change into a truck?
All we need is some energon and lots of luck.
A.T.T. will let us know just how much we suck.
We are nuts...you know that we must be stupid.
It's like Albert without Fat.
It's like candy without taste.
It's like a G.I. Joe that doesn't swivel at the waist.
We must be stupid!
Yes. You know that we must be stupid.
This concept stinks, it stinks like dog-doo.
Make your face turn all blue.
Prowl will have a knee that bends,
and an elbow that does not.
Action Masters can be your friends.
Damn the line is making a profit.
So lets make Action Masters,
And then we can scrap it.
We've got to lose some cash.
So lets go smoke some hash.
We must be stupid.
We must be stupid.
We must be stupid. <Transformers that don't change>
We must be stupid. <Transformers that don't change>
We must be stupid. <Transformers that don't change>
Transformers that don't change. <They're called Action Masters!>
What did I do?
(You killed the toy-line.)
I swear, I didn't mean to!
(You are a liar.)
No really! I didn't want to!
(You're ugly too.)
That wasn't very nice.
(I learned it from Grimlock.)
He used to be a T-Rex, right?
(Not anymore.)
Now he's an action master!
(Which means he sucks now.)
Oh, you'll get used to it.
(I do not think so.)
Trust me. You'll love 'em!
(I want changing
TF's!)
These are better!
(Bull-hooey!)
Tobias J Ubercat
