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Honour - Issue #1 (Spotlight: Dinobot)

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Old 06-04-2013, 11:48 PM   #1
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Honour - Issue #1 (Spotlight: Dinobot)

G'Day all,

I've uploaded the Script for Issue #1 of Transformers: Honour up on my DeviantArt Account.

The series (an intended 4 Issues) is a backstory for Dinobot from Beast Wars, and could well have been called Spotlight: Dinobot, but Honour had a nicer ring to it.

Transformers: Honour - Issue #1

I'd love to get some feedback on it. And extra points for anyone who would care to guess who Shadow, the mysterious cloaked figure is.

Cheers,
Verno.
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Old 06-05-2013, 11:26 AM   #2
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Great work!!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alan Watts"Spectrum of Love"
We know that from time to time there arise among human beings people who seem to exude love as naturally as the sun gives out heat. These people, usually of enormous creative power, are the envy of us all, and, by and large, manís religions are attempts to cultivate that same power in ordinary people.
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Old 06-05-2013, 11:51 AM   #3
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Not too bad. I like that you've kept it in script format, as opposed to rewriting it. I'm also liking that already we've gotten Cryotek involved, who is quite the big player, after all, what with being a mentor to Megatron.

I'm not quite sure who Shadow is. I have a hunch, but I'll withhold that until it's revealed. As for the writing itself, good distinct verbal quirks. The almost every-sentence enunciation emphasis that Cryotek has is especially nice.
Check out my fiction, Transformers: Warhead!
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Old 06-05-2013, 06:07 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RoadRage
Great work!!!
Cheers, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vaikyuko View Post
Not too bad. I like that you've kept it in script format, as opposed to rewriting it. I'm also liking that already we've gotten Cryotek involved, who is quite the big player, after all, what with being a mentor to Megatron.
Cryotek is delicious to write for. Yes, with him being a mentor for Megatron, I tried to make it clear where Megatron got some of his 'pomp' from.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vaikyuko
I'm not quite sure who Shadow is. I have a hunch, but I'll withhold that until it's revealed. As for the writing itself, good distinct verbal quirks. The almost every-sentence enunciation emphasis that Cryotek has is especially nice.
I try to make them all different in their speech patterns, but I worry that it doesn't translate through, so I'm very glad you said that - thank you!
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