Megatron Enters Re-Hab Clinic; Starscream Vows Weightloss For Image Change

Discussion in 'Transformers Fan Fiction' started by Tycho, Feb 19, 2007.

  1. Tycho

    Tycho Well-Known Member

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    Following in the wake of multiple celebrities entering treatment programs and appologizing for insensitive remarks being made, several Transformers have proven to be no exception.

    Megatron has entered the Betty Ford Clinic in an attempt to wean his over-consumption of energon. Quite simply, if he continues on his unhealthy course he's been following, he'll consume all the earth's energy and there will be nothing much left to fight over. Therapists are trying to help him re-develop his identity and come to terms with his disorder. In the meanwhile, Megatron has taken a blowtorch to himself and shaved off his superfluous metal trimmings that stylist Michael Bay once added to him for his look he sported during the production of his new movie due in theaters this summer, which wrapped a major portion of its filming last year. As part of his cleaning up his image, Megatron also scraped dead US military personnel off his feet that he'd stepped on during the course of his own stunt work he also did for this film.

    Meanwhile, Starscream has been disgruntled and quoted that he looks in the mirror and sees himself turning into some kind of bug-headed gorilla. This is completely unacceptable, so he has invaded a small middle-eastern nation and promises to yeild its sovereignty to Oprah Winfrey if she will help him shed some pounds in the right places.

    Ironhide has recently stumbled publically, and said he may have made some statements that were insensitive to Decepticons. He vows that in the future, he will just try to kill them and not hurt their feelings by making remarks about their structural maintainance. He realizes now that he is not really one to talk.

    No politics read the board rules. http://www.tfw2005.com/boards/rules.php
     
  2. Cobalt Agent

    Cobalt Agent My dick kills dinosaurs

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    I'll be amazed if this can stay here (for quite a few reasons).
     
  3. onesock

    onesock Banned

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    Where's the comic?
     
  4. Cobalt Agent

    Cobalt Agent My dick kills dinosaurs

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    That's one of the reasons.
     
  5. Tycho

    Tycho Well-Known Member

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    I got creative and made an "Onion report" I thought sort of humorous, but I wasn't quite sure what section to post it in.

    I figured "News and Rumors" were really toy related so I didn't go there.

    If a mod thinks my post isn't appropriate for this section and if there is a place for humor that it could work in, I'd appreciate it if the thread were moved versus deleted.

    Meanwhile, if anyone thinks this was creative or funny, please let me know. If you think you can write something funnier, please post it! :) 
     
  6. Cobalt Agent

    Cobalt Agent My dick kills dinosaurs

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    Well it was certainly creative, but that's not why I think it might be an issue. Certain things in your post definately have questionable material in them that might be breaking rules simply for being there. Forgetting that there's no comic and that, perhaps, anything can go into Funnies if it's a transformers joke OR comic- the material itself can definately warrant a warning. I would know. I've gotten a warning for simply posting a comic containing a joke that could have offending Joe Nobody Whoeverson. I'm not going to say what part of the post and get you into shit that even Buzz might not see himself as a possible offense. If you want to know what I think, pm me.
     
  7. Gears

    Gears buh-buh-body ya Veteran

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    :lol  Pretty good, but it would be better if maybe you added some generic pics of each character to lead off their paragraph.
     
  8. Tycho

    Tycho Well-Known Member

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    That's another problem: I could attach images, but I'm not schooled in how to insert them into the text. Furthermore, since the article is not serious, real pictures of either the toys or the movie characters would not really be funny. If I inspire someone to draw a cartoon of a comical "gorilla Starscream with Oprah Winfrey" for example, that would be funny.

    I could Photoshop it, but again, the realistic look wouldn't do an "Onion article" justice.

    The guy that draws the cartoons here is so talented!
     
  9. Gears

    Gears buh-buh-body ya Veteran

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    You could find for example an old screen cap of Megatron from the cartoon, then save it to photobucket ot Imageshack. Then use [​IMG] tags to add them to the text. Also get a pic of cartoon Screamer and put it side by side next to a pic of Oprah. I think it would be funny.
     
  10. Tycho

    Tycho Well-Known Member

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    I had an idea of taking the movie toy Starscream, rotating it so it looks like he's doing pushups, and inserting Oprah behind him with a cartoon bubble counting: "1, 2, 3... keep it going!"

    But meanwhile, I don't have the time for such an endeavor that might take me at least a 1/2 hour. It's the movie Starscream that needs to lose weight in the shoulders anyway. Besides, once again, the real images are not actually comical.

    Sorry to turn this into a movie discussion, but for a second... the movie designs are actually frightening in a cool way. I mean it will make quite a screen impression. As an old G1 fan, my problem is not how these 2007 Transformers look, it's that I wanted them to represent my beloved 1984 Transformers that I started out as a fan of, and wanted there to be a live-action movie with for so long.

    So another picture, poking fun of Britney recently shaving her head, would be movie Megatron shaving his spiked parts. That wouldn't work for the terror-figure that Michael Bay is showing, but an expression-full movie cartoon doing as such could look funny. Again, it wouldn't be the traditional G1 Megatron, because there's nothing wrong with him.

    Notice how a joke gets more and more old, the more it requires an explanation.

    Now a Mike Richards (is that his name? The Seinfeld guy?) doing stand-up on stage with Ironhide, could make a funny picture no matter how you cut that - but the G1 image would be funnier.

    Oh, I've got it! Barricade writing Ironhide a ticket, with Mel Gibson driving. Haha.

    A thought-bubble coming off Gibson would read, "$#%#$! Decepticons!"

    For the Mirage joke, all you need is a pic of Jane Fonda since Mirage is invisible anyway. (see he IS in the 2007 movie - you just can't see him! haha)
     
  11. PakiroVah

    PakiroVah Hasbro's Slave

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    Now see, that's the thing. Your jokes, albeit funny, are insulting real people.
     
  12. Poho

    Poho That's MISTER Poho to you

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    i thought it was really funny.
     
  13. Autovolt 127

    Autovolt 127 Get In The Titan, Prime!

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    Wow These are amazing Stories It's like E.T
     
  14. SPLIT LIP

    SPLIT LIP Be strong enough to be gentle

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    :useless  Even PS images would be better than nothing.
     
  15. Seienchan

    Seienchan New Member

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    Wow, this is muy hirarious. XD Seriously. It reminds me of something from the Private Eye, if they were concerned with the Giant Robots. (For the non-british of you, the PE is a political and current affairs satire magazine)

    And guys, this makes me wonder if half of you have even *heard* of the media. This post is NOT insulting to ANYONE. Except maybe Megatron and Starscream, but they're probably too busy in-fighting to notice. X3 But like, really. This post is not offensive. People who are quick to take offence would not consider this offensive.

    Nice one, man ^^