Worst novel you've ever read

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Rodimus Prime, Dec 1, 2008.

  1. Rodimus Prime

    Rodimus Prime Sola Gratia, Sola Fide TFW2005 Supporter

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    Anna Karenina - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

    Think nearly 2000 page soap opera set in 19th century Russia. Oh, and did I mention that in Russia everyone has at least five, if not more, names?

    The best/worst part is that after suffering through over 1500 pages, she throws herself under a train and her last thought is "wait, I want to li---"(Train runs over her)

    At that point the book went flying into the nearest wall.
     
  2. GW_Freak

    GW_Freak Banned

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    Twilight.... I've read better Harry Potter Slash fiction.
     
  3. Paladin

    Paladin Have Zord, Will Travel

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    The Great Gatsby. Boring piece of crap.
     
  4. Optimus Sledge

    Optimus Sledge Yar har fiddle di dee

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    Red Rabbit by Tom Clancy. Nothing of any real interest happens at the beginnings of Jack Ryan's career, and it doesn't make any sense in the context of the later books. Not worth the 50p it cost me.
     
  5. Hiraga

    Hiraga BILL BILL BILL BILL BILL

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    The secret life of bee's.
     
  6. SpeedBreaker

    SpeedBreaker DESTRON NEW LEADER

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    The Lost World.
     
  7. Paladin

    Paladin Have Zord, Will Travel

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    Michael Crichton version or Conan Doyle version?
     
  8. seeker311

    seeker311 The Collector

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    The Scarlet Letter, classic my ass
     
  9. Brawlastator

    Brawlastator it is our life - jon bovi

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    West Side Story. The book seems like it was hastily written while the author was watching the play. I did find it quite amusing that the writer was trying to make the reader think that four guys doing a what sounded like a chicken walk whilst snapping their fingers is supposed to be intimidating, as this is the sign that the notorious Jets are on the prowl. You could really tell that the author was struggling to come up with everything that wasn't describing dance movements and parroting the play's dialog.

    "Oh NO!! It's the Jets!"
    "HAAAY BUDDY! You are SOOO going to get thuper-thlapped if you don't hand over the wallet, K handsome?"
     
  10. KidDynamite

    KidDynamite don't know nothing Veteran

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    Oh, by far...BY FAR: That first Transformers novel from 5 or 6 years ago. What was it called? Hardwire or something like that? Everything about it was awful. The writing and plot were worse than bad fan fiction, filled with juvenile language and gory violence for the sake of shock rather than serving any real purpose. It's the difference between the "maturity" of Mortal Kombat or GWAR and the maturity of something like Goodfellas. It was set in the Dreamwave comic universe, but the stupid nonsense one from the first miniseries that had been abandoned by the time the book was published. It even had issues with scale that made the notorious scale issues in the G1 cartoon look good. I particularly recall Prowl, a police car, being described as EIGHT STORIES TALL in robot mode. I forced myself to finish it, but DAMN. I've read a lot of books in my day, but nothing has ever nor probably will ever approach the depths of ineptitude in that book.

    While that is easily the worst book I've read, I would actually rate another experience of reading as worse. When I was in 9th grade I had a rather eccentric English teacher (she was prone to forgetting to assign homework and then accusing the entire class of conspiring against her by not turning in the homework she hadn't assigned, and once sent the whole class to detention for it). She assigned us to read Edith Wharton's Mythology over Christmas break. Now, it sucks to have homework over Christmas anyway, and Mythology (a collection of, I believe, Greek myths) in particular is a long, ponderous book to read, especially for 14 & 15 year olds. It isn't bad, and I still own a copy to this day and will sometimes flip through it, but that really, really sucked. I managed to finish it though...but almost nobody else did, including the teacher, who forget she assigned it and never covered it in class. So I wasted my break plowing slowly through that book for nothing.
     
  11. eyeballkid

    eyeballkid Old

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    Dune.
     
  12. Katamari Prime

    Katamari Prime Hassan Chop! TFW2005 Supporter

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    Lord of the rings; It just never ended. My Junior high gym class was more fun.
     
  13. Doug

    Doug Well-Known Member

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    The two worst Stephen King novels I've read is "Gerald's Game" and "The Tommyknockers". One book I've read from Clive Barker that I did'nt like was "Damnation Game".
     
  14. Sideways

    Sideways Banned

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    I won't read another Tom Clancy book.Ever... again.
     
  15. Belgrath

    Belgrath Boom! Nutshot!

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    Catcher in the Rye (when I was in secondary 4, aka grade 10). I mean, why in the hell do people think it's the "best" book?! It sucked ass... hard. (hell, half of the class hated it) Personally, I thought Of Mice and Men was a better read than that dreck.
     
  16. jourdo

    jourdo TFW2005 Supporter

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    I'll second that. I tried and tried to get through the Fellowship and couldn't do it. It landed in the giant pile of books I started and never finished.

    Mobey Dick is another one I want to give another go at... it just felt too much like English class and I gave up on it.
     
  17. SpeedBreaker

    SpeedBreaker DESTRON NEW LEADER

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    The Michael Crichton version.
     
  18. Boy who screams

    Boy who screams Banned

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    Fixed, for emphasis.
     
  19. CdnShockwave

    CdnShockwave The Prince of Poses TFW2005 Supporter

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    It's a toss up between Tess of the D'urbervilles and The Wizard of Oz.
     
  20. Boy who screams

    Boy who screams Banned

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    Just because the main 'baddie' was killed by a weakness you discovered the page before, doesn't make The Wizards of Oz any less than 'pretty good'.

    Watch 'Wicked' for extra awesome factor.
     

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