I am writing this in my college English composition class, This is the 2nd draft, with one more edition to go. I want to see what you guys think.


‘Until that day, ‘Till all are one’’


It was July 4th of 2007, while most were setting up barbeques, chilling a few beers in coolers, and lighting fireworks for our independence day, me and my future wife, were in the movie theater. I tried my best to act my age, and not be overly excited about what was about to commence. But as soon as that moment happened, when the word scrolled on the screen, the word that had followed me for years, I couldn’t help but flash backwards in my life to another time, when that same word scrolled before me.

That time, it was August 8th1986 and I was three years old. My father and I sat in the theater, not too different than the one I would be sitting in years later. The lights dimmed, and like any child of that time, I sat, shaking in anticipation, two fists plunged into a buttery bucket of popcorn, filling my little belly with acidic soda, and waiting for that moment when my favorite franchise would grace the big screen for the first time. A few handfuls of salty goodness into the trailers, I couldn't remember what movies they were trying to advertise. They didn’t matter. They just served as distractions from what I wanted.

In the first few moments of the movies intro, the vibrations that came from the theater’s speakers shook the room. I felt a bit afraid, a fear I soaked up in sheer excitement of what was coming. Like the death star’s hovering over the screen in ‘’Star Wars: a New Hope’’, the menacing villain of the film, Unicron, had made its planet sized entrance. Nothing could stop it as it devoured another planet, taking into it mechanical lives, and chunks of planetary metal sections. The moment was inching ever closer.

The vibrations stopped, and were replaced with pulsing drum beats, a slowly crawling guitar riff, and the rushing words, the words that fulfilled my moment. Three words that spoke the name of my life long favorite franchise, and began the movie for me, ‘’Transformers: The Movie’’

Flashing lights and moving images passed before me. Colored lasers shot from animated blasters tore into the combatants. I soaked up every second as if my eyes had seen water for the first time, and salivated for more. Planes instantly changed into robotic human like beings, back into planes like a reflex. To me, it was the coolest thing I had ever seen.

I was used to Snow white, Tom and Jerry, but that was ‘’kids’’ stuff compared to this. Why watch a damsel get the prince at the end of the movie, and ride off on a pumpkin carriage, when the carriage should just transform into a warrior and defend them.

About twenty minutes into the movie, my hero, Optimus prime, was killed. And as if right in front of me, my idol was gunned down, the tears streaked my face, and I hugged the arm of my dad. Death had been foreign to me, I didn’t understand it, but it became far too clear as Optimus was not seen throughout the remainder of the movie. I remember some parents walking out with their children in tow, disgusted that a ‘cartoon’ would show such brutal killing. Before Prime, there were about ten autobot deaths. It was unheard of in the 80s. But none shook me more than seeing Optimus laid to rest.

I looked at my father after Primes final scene, with popcorn kernels in my small hands shoveling them in my mouth quicker than any other human could muster. Not even the inevitable stomach ache would ruin this movie for me. Unicron and the decepticons were going down, I just knew it. With or without Prime leading them, they couldn’t be defeated. And after 88 minutes, my young minded and fully felt premonition was true. The Autobots won, and the moment had passed.

Flash forward 25 years later, I no longer had a relationship with the father I shared that moment the first time with. I didn’t need him; I had my future wife, Serita, to share it with. This time, my hand was on one side of the buttery bucket, hers, on the other. A bigger cup of pop between the two of us, and my 24 year old body shaking in anticipation, like I hadn’t felt in more than two decades. The moment was coming closer to me again. And with it, I was a kid again.

We were in the same theater that my father and I were in. Albeit remodeled, I still felt that same anxiousness walking through the doors. Not because it was my first time, but because I knew for a second time in my life, I would feel the moment. This time, my hero would look more realistic than ever. This was live action, in the flesh (or metal if you will), and I was ready to take it all in. The lights dimmed, the movie began, and I experienced Transformers the movie, all over again, just in a different way.

Years later, a trilogy of live action transformers movies now completed, I sat and wondered what gave the Transformers the staying power in my life. Was it the heroism I found in the Autobots, the fear and actual charismatic intrigue of the Decepticons? Was it the remembrance of a time where innocence reigned, and the horrible things my father did have yet to happen?

While sitting in my living room, I popped in one of the four dvd copies I have of the original 1986 movie playing in my x-box. My wife and I are watching it for possibly the hundredth time, and I wonder once again. What does Transformers mean to me? Its more than a cartoon, more than nostalgia, it reminds me that no matter how old I become, or how distant I now am from my father, with whom I shared the original moment with.

I will always be me. And with my first child on the way, I can now relive that moment with him or her, and remember we’re all kids at heart, even when we try not to be.

 

Well done. I think my English teacher would be impressed. Though you DO need to proofread it (again?); I noticed some phrases where verb tenses disagreed with each other, and a sorry lack of hyphens. I'm in high school right now and took AP English Language and Composition last year, so I can really appreciate what you've done rhetorically, even at this early stage.

 

Thanks, I'm 28, and finally getting back on the school horse, so the essay thing is a bit rusty for me. I'm great at fictional writing and such, but the school-esque writing, I'm working on it