this is a short story i thought of. it takes place during the opening scene of ROTF. Jack Wilson was an average human. Average height, average weight, average intelligence. A dead-end job in a low level government facility. He lived alone in an apartment downtown. Never married. No known offspring. No close friends. He might as well have never existed. Bugly was a decepticon. One of the worst. He became a Black-stripe in metallicato in order to inflict pain more efficiently. He loved to inflict pain. His favorite beings to bring harm to were humans. They break easily. So easily. At first glance, these two subjects do not have anything in common. Look again. Jack was bored. Bored, bored, bored. "nothing exciting ever happens around here." he thought, "it's the same day after day." He watched as his co-workers went about their daily activities. Sheryl filing forms, Donna typing out documents and Gordon sipping coffee on his break. Jack looked back to his computer, "I might as well check my e-mail while i'm here." One log-in later, he was scrolling down through the spam, coupons and- "hello, what's this?" It was an e-mail from username email@example.com. it's time, the package will arrive on the hour. Jack grinned. Now things were gonna heat up. ********** The building's janitor, Gregg, was just finishing moping up some spilled lasagna when he heard gunfire. "the heck?" Gregg walked up to the office door. "dagnabit, if Gordon doesn't turn down the break room TV he's gonna give us all heart attacks" As he began to turn the handle, a big metal thing burst trough the door. not stopping when it saw Gregg, it bowled him over and knocked him into the wall. Gregg looked up to see Jack walking away, finishing his transformation from the winged metallic creature that he had been just moments before. "so, you card has been played. well, me not only have wild card, me am wild card!" Millions of panels folded away from Gregg's body, revealing the robot inside. Giving one last glance into the room, now full of resolve, he contorted his shape into that resembling a tyrannosaurus-rex, and gave chase. ********** Jack made his way to the mail room, checking his watch to make sure that he wasn't late. He grimaced when he saw the vehicle waiting for him. "you're late." the black Audi said to him. "five minutes is insignificant. i had some... business to take care of." "i think you take your disguise too seriously. really, Bugly, what's the point of it all?" Bugly growled, "shut up, where's the package? Starscream said i'd get it on the hour." Deadend opened his door. "the subject is in the case. his size will make it easy to sneak into the girl's shop." Bugly opened the steel case, a small remote controlled truck sat inside. "wha? wha? hey! youse two mooks! where am i? dis ain't kaon!" Bugly closed the case. "silence fool! you work for the decepticons now!" suddenly, Deadend's horn went off. "ack! you lead him right to us!" "what?" Gregg, in his robotic t-rex mode, leaped off the roof of the building, landing right in front of the decepticons. "me Grimlock kick butt!" Bugly quickly got into Deadend's passenger seat. "drive!" Deadend spead away. "face it, we're doomed." Wheelie looked into the rear view mirror, grimlock could be seen charging towards them. "dis is nuts i tell yah! he's gonna rip out our exhaust ports and feed 'em to each other!" Bugly transformed into his robot mode. his head retreated into his shoulders, his arms and legs got longer and twin rocket launchers spouted out of his back. "not if i can help it." Rolling down his window, Bugly leaned out and opened fire with his rockets. ********** Grimlock dodged the missiles and leaped on top of Deadend's hood. transforming to robot mode, Grimlock tried to shoot through the windshield with his tail-gun. "It's bulletproof." Deadend grumbled. "not that you'd care." Deadend popped his hood open, sending Grimlock flying. before Grimlock could clear the Audi, Deadend popped his trunk too, slamming Grimlock in the face. Bugly's feral grin could have broken a mirror. "now i'll finish him!" transforming into a fly-like robot, Bugly flew out of Deadend's open door and opened fire on Grimlock. ********** Grimlock was not in the best of moods. he knew that he had to take out the decepticons quickly, before too many humans saw them. he knew that it was a little much for him to take out a fellow pretender and a "bulk." so, as much as he was loath to do so, he called for help. Smokescreen was happy to oblige. ********** Bugly was having a hard time actually hitting Grimlock. "slag it, Deadend! stop swerving so much!" Deadend wasn't in a listening mood. "i have the stinking bane of polyhex on my back! nobody cares what i feel." Grimlock smiled under his faceplate. "don't worry, me Grimlock not do all things rumors about me Grimlock say. not all things." In response, Bugly hit Grimlock in the shoulder with a round. "silence fool! you have no chance alone!" Grimlock transformed into his dinosaur mode. "me Grimlock no alone! show 'em Smokescreen!" Deadend looked forward to a bridge that he was about to cross and saw a blue and red Pontiac solstice at the other end. "shoot." Smokescreen drove down the opposite lane that Deadend was driving on and began laying his smoke screen. making a u-turn at the other end he continued poring out smoke, obscuring both the decepticon's vision, and that of any curious onlookers. Charging in at full speed, Smokescreen t-boned Deadend off the bridge, sending Grimlock flying. Grimlock took advantage of this by landing on top of Bugly's back, sending them both to the ground below. Both Grimlock and Bugly changed out of their beast modes and stood facing each other. ********** Smokescreen and Deadend landed in the river. transforming into robot mode they began attacking each other. Deadend morphed his hand into a buzzsaw and swung it at Smokescreen. "why can't you autobots just leave me alone?" Smokescreen blocked the saw with his telescoping sword. "let's make a deal." Deadend leaped back and transformed his hand into a sniper rifle. "oh yeah? what's that? not that i care. nobody cares." Dodgeing almost point-blank shots, Smokescreen swung his sword and sliced off Deadend's barrel. "you leave the humans alone and i'll be happy to ignore you!" Deadend roared. "nobody cares and neither do i, but nobody ignores ME!" Deadend charged at Smokescreen with buzzsaw blaring, but Smoke screen dodged the enraged decepticon. Deadend heard a loud bang coming from the direction of the bridge an turned to look, prepared for anything. unfortunately for him, the bang originated from a sonic bomb that Smokescreen launched. Deadend looked down at the blade protruding from his chest. "nobody but nobody messes with my friends!" Deadend slumped into the water. "why doesn't anybody like me?" ********** meanwhile, on the bridge, blades were whirling and shots were fired as the pretenders duked it out. Bugly got in a lucky swipe with a wing-blade, slicing off grimlock's ear. "you, you and all those like you, shall die when my master returns!" Grimlock shrugged it off and transformerd into beast mode, pouncing onto Bugly and sinking his teeth into Bugly's arm. "me Grimlock not give hoot 'bout screamer!" Bugly atempted to pull away. "no, fool! not starscream! non other than the ultimate warri- argh!" Grimlock had bit Bugly's entire left arm off. "ultimate, shmultimate." Bugly roared in anger and pain, launching rocket after rocket at Grimlock. Grimlock quickly transformed into robot mode and ran strait for Bugly. the two pretenders collided and rolled, Grimlock ended up at the bottom. Before Bugly could strike with his blade, Grimlock rolled them again, bringing up his legs between them, and kicked out, sending Bugly flying. "me Grimlock am badaft!" Grimlock stood up, ready for anything, exept for what he saw. When he threw Bugly, the decepticon had landed on the broken railling, impailed by the steel. "hm, that easyer than me thought." Grimlock walked up to the pretender with tail-gun drawn and cocked. "you, creepy-bot. you have any last words? me Grimlock hate having to take prisoners." Bugly spat mech-fluid at Grimlock's face. "idiot! even in death, the ultimate warrior's command is final!" Grimlock shruged. "'k me Grimlock am flexible." Transforming his tail-gun into a sword, Grimlock sliced Bugly's head off. Grimlock then transformed back into Gregg. "oh, great. another mess to clean up." Smokescreen drove up. "heh, that other guy hit a dead end." Gregg smiled. "me Gregg love dry humor. *cough* er, I love dry humor." Smokescreen chuckled. "so tell me, how does a janator earn enough money to afford a solstice?" "that the magic of credit cards me friend." ********** Wheelie washed up on the shore about a mile down. "man, dat wernt no joyride. i got a robo-wedgie." Climbing up on the rocks, Wheelie tried to get his berings. "now let's see, if bridge it dat way, an da highway is dat way den da toystore is..." Wheelie didn't finish because he was too busy leaking lubricants all over his feet. standing over him was another decepticon. Barricade. "your mission, should you choose to accept it, and beleave me, you accept it, is to infiltrate the human female's home and steal the allspark shard." Barricade bent over and extended his "probes." "falure in not an option." Wheelie by this time had run dry on lubricant. "so... where do i start?" ********** finis.