Thoughts about Relationships and Cheating

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Jux, Jul 24, 2006.

  1. 03Mach1

    03Mach1 Logic has been replaced with blind ignorance.

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    If the third party new ahead a time, their just as guilty as the cheater.
     
  2. Wreckgar

    Wreckgar Anthony Stark Veteran

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    I'll saw that I'm guilty of being the "cheate". I was going out with a girl who was already going out with some guy. She said over and over again that they were going to break up and eventually did but I felt no obligation to not be with her becasue he was. The guy actually knew about the two of us and came to my work to confront me. His confrontation?

    He hat at the counter where I was cooking. I, being a huge dick, walked right up to him and say "Hey! How's it going man?" with a big old shit-eating grin on my face. He slumped a bit and said "Nothing". We had a normal guy conversation, about football and shit and he left. Not leave to meet me in the parking lot after I got off. No, he left as in drove away.
     
  3. Foster

    Foster Haslab Victory Saber Backer #3 Veteran

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    Without knowing more, I'd say he realized that you weren't the problem. I'd say the same for most third parties. There are those that poach, sure. But most times, I'd say infidelity is more a symptom of a troubled relationship, than a root cause. There's almost always deeper shit like communication or intimacy issues.
     
  4. CripNite

    CripNite That Whack Canuck Dude

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    Y'know, this is a good topic of discussion.

    In high school I had a friend named Jay. He was going out with this girl, Christy. They went out for about a year or so. During that year, he cheated on her about 14 times, with several other girls (he was a player). I got into a fistfight with him twice over his disrespect of Christy. They eventually broke up and moved on.

    A couple years later, I've found that Christy has gotten quite flirtatious on the internet and a female friend has invited her with her okay to go to her place while she is not there and have sex with her husband. Christy figures this is an okay situation. It turns out that this female friend has set this up so she can use the incident as a method to divorce her husband. Christy felt quite awful that her actions had caused this, but apparently had learned nothing by being cheated on repeatedly by her first love.

    So... the moral of the story, is that you shouldn't feel too bad for that third person... chances are they have been cheated on before and use their "third person" status to try and justify what had happened before. More likely than not, that person needs some good old fashioned counseling. I should also mention that Christy comes from a family that her dad is 17 years older than her mom and had left his first wife after having an affair with her mom.

    So... also... those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.
     
  5. Shaun_C

    Shaun_C The REAL One True fan Veteran TFW2005 Supporter

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    I knew a guy like that too

    Last time I saw him he'd be setting up booty calls under an assumed name.

    One time he just finsihed setting up a booty call and not even 5 minutes later he's calling his gf saying "Hi honey,I'm just calling to say I love you"

    He even did this IN his gf's house.The poor girl nearly committed suicide because of how he treated her.But now last I heard she has a fiance that treats her with WAY more respect then he ever did
     
  6. Mr. Jiggles

    Mr. Jiggles loves your mother.

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    I had a buddy and one of his 'friends' cheated with my buddy's wife.

    So my buddy had sex with his friend's mother.

    The his friend's dad got pissed because he found out that his wife had sex with his son's friend because his son had sex with his wife.

    Wait. I'm confused.

    Nevermind.
     
  7. butz

    butz slippery when wet

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    I'm going to say it depends; say the third person is a guy, and actively tries to get the girl to cheat on her BF with him, and hook up with him despite the relationship, then he is actually worse. I know a guy from work who only seems to hit on girls who are already in a relationship (I think he gets off on the idea that they're cheating on their BFs with him)- he is damn persistant about it too, and doesn't take "no" for an answer. Total douchebag. I'm hoping he pisses someone off enough with that kinda crap that he gets shot.
    On the other hand, if the person doing the cheating is the one who initiates, yeah maybe the third person is guilty for going along with it, but the problem really lies with the one who made the descision to cheat.
    This is all assuming its actually an exclusive relationship though- people tend to think that just because they're going on dates with someone that suddenly they're in an exclusive, committed relationship.
     
  8. KA

    KA Well-Known Member

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    its cool to cheat as long as in the end you convinced them to egt into a menage twah...trwah...twois...DAMBIT!

    threesome.
     
  9. TrickyDisco

    TrickyDisco <b><font color=blue>Voted TFW2005's Sexiest Female

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    Wow, who needs a blog when you have 2005? :lol 

    Third party POW...this is a tough one.

    If I was the third party?
    It would depend on the situation of my becoming so whether I fould feel guilty or not...
    Seeing as I can be quite morally corrupt, this might turn quite interesting :lol 
     
  10. Dalarsco

    Dalarsco Kickback=ROCK

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    I should add to my earlier post. There are some points when the other man/woman is at fault. If the man/woman actively pursues a relationship with someone knowing that they are attached then they suck. Especially if it's a friends GF/BF.
     
  11. Foster

    Foster Haslab Victory Saber Backer #3 Veteran

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    Then let's *make* it interesting. Say you're the third party. You didn't poach, you were persued by a married man. (I'm assuming you're straight, if not, just flip that.)

    Continuing the example, you were persued, but you did lead him (her) on, flirting, saying how lucky his (her) mate was, schoolgirl crush.

    Say a hookup occured. Do you feel guilty, and do you continue it or break it off?
     
  12. Chaos Muffin

    Chaos Muffin Misadventure Veteran

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    If I was married and she cheated with another guy, then Id say it's more her fault for not having control.
    Would hate the dude too, but guys will be guys.
    Just hope I never run into them on a dark night.

    There's always going to be guys hitting on your woman, it's in their dickheaded nature. But if she gives in, then dump the ho, and bang her friends.
     
  13. Foster

    Foster Haslab Victory Saber Backer #3 Veteran

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    QFT. And her sister, if she has one.
     
  14. Jux

    Jux Please, call me Steve. Veteran

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    If you're not good enough to keep your girl in a solid relationship with you, then you deserve to lose her.
     
  15. TheIncredibleHulk

    TheIncredibleHulk Bad Luck Incarnate

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    If I ever caught my wife with another guy, regardless if he knew or not. he'd be a dead motherfucker.
     
  16. Grimlock_13

    Grimlock_13 Currently facepalming at your post

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    If the third party was in the dark they were getting involved with a person already in a relationship they're not at fault. If they DID know they're just as at fault as the person doing the cheating. Just my $.02
     
  17. Foster

    Foster Haslab Victory Saber Backer #3 Veteran

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    What if she's looking for something you don't have? Like boobs?
     
  18. Kickback

    Kickback @GeekWithChris Administrator News Staff

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    If you screw up repeatidly, but she chooses to stay with you, then marry the girl ASAP because you won't find someone more loyal.

    See: my situation
     
  19. TrickyDisco

    TrickyDisco <b><font color=blue>Voted TFW2005's Sexiest Female

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    If a hookup occurred, be it by mine or his initiation, I'd still feel no regret.
    If he initiated it, he obviously doesn't have the balls to be loyal to his wife.
    If I initiated it, he should be able to just say NO. If he doesn't, then, again, he doesn't have the balls to be loyal to his wife.
    Why should that be my fault exclusively? He'd probably do the exact same thing with someone else anyway.

    If I knew already that he was taken, I'd have to be pretty into the guy to continue. Otherwise, I'd probably cut it off, but don't count on that.

    I'd feel a lot worse if I found out afterwards that he was married with 2.5 kids and a station wagon in the driveway. But as I said before: If I was already into him, I'd probably keep it going, but I seriously doubt that would last long.

    In the end, you can't really decide who you fall for and who falls for you. What if I found someone, got married and the whole shebang, and *then* I find my soulmate?
     
  20. Motor_Master

    Motor_Master Lets the balls touch

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    Regardless of where the relationship is, the one looking for love outside the relationship should have the guts to tell the other person its over before the affair occurs.

    Id be WAY more understanding if my girlfriend said it was over between us because she wanted to pursue a relationship with someone else. Id still be pissed off, but I wouldn't be doing 20 - 30 years for a double homicide.