The OTHER Transformers Prologue

Discussion in 'Transformers Fan Fiction' started by neospark1, Mar 8, 2007.

  1. neospark1

    neospark1 Well-Known Member

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    I are Bumblebees. I like floating. I like stinging.

    Transformers like shiny cube. We used to call it the Matrix, but something called Hollywood was real mean. We then called it the Cube, but little flesh things buzzed Cybertron, real mad like. We finally call it Allspark and ducked. OK, everything cool now.

    weeee!

    Am in space now. Look kinda like a shiny human sperm thing. Sorry (cough, cough), errrrr ... bad throat thing going on.

    Long time ago, smashed in face Optimus Prime and bird-face Megatron like each other. Everyone on Cybertron like each other.

    That was nice.

    Then bird-face Megs got really, really mean. It happened after his fingernails got real long and his face melted.

    Megs wanted matrix cube Allspark. He think it can give great manicure and have extreme face makeover.

    Megs made other people feel sorry for him. If they not feel sorry for him, he eat them. Bad guys not want to be eaten, so Megs gets BIIIG army and starts war.

    Megs wants matrix cube Allspark so bad he even mess up my crib. Optimus shoots shiny matrix cube Allspark into space.

    Me think that real dumb idea. Mean, think about it. If ME can shoot off into space like shiny space human sperm, then ....

    Wait. Me gotta go. Me feel alllllll weird inside. Me think it matrix cube Allspark sense.

    Weeeeee!!!!!!

    To Be Continued!
     
  2. Poho

    Poho That's MISTER Poho to you

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    funny, yet im not sure if you're complaining or not.
     
  3. neospark1

    neospark1 Well-Known Member

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    Thanks! Nah, not complaining at all. Just making humor by overstating some obvious things and some more subtle things I have picked up on (I mean, Prologue Optimus' face DOES look like He-Man introduced Fisto to it).

    :lolol 
     
  4. Poho

    Poho That's MISTER Poho to you

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    in that case i approve. this is really funny.
     
  5. neospark1

    neospark1 Well-Known Member

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    I are Bumblebees. I like floating. I like stinging.

    Transformers like shiny cube. We used to call it the Matrix, but something called Hollywood was real mean. We then called it the Cube, but little flesh things buzzed Cybertron, real mad like. We finally call it Allspark and ducked. OK, everything cool now.

    weeee!

    Am in space now. Look kinda like a shiny human sperm thing. Sorry (cough, cough), errrrr ... bad throat thing going on.

    Wait. Me been there before. Must have bad memory.

    So Optimus said to me, "Bumblebees, you need to be the bitch-bot. Sorry, them's the breaks. You go stop Megs and billions of Decepticreeps. Me, well, let's just say I'm gonna do something REALLY cool!"

    Me was at Tyger Pax. It's GREEEEEAT! Me joined by click-bots with red exo-torso-shirt plates. They all look alike. Me always wonder why. About six of them. Used to be twelve. They always get blown up real fast. Hmmm, Bumblebees like that idea!

    Anywhotbot, there is this really weird bot with me. He very different. Very small. Real thin face. BIG upper skidplate, you know what I mean. I think I call him RC.

    So here we are. Clik-bots starting to get smart on Bumblebees! They start thinking maybe we not here for RADimus partry! Me just keep lying. Better that way.

    Besides, clik-bots not last very long. You know how that goes.

    Me starting to get the bad hurty feelings about lying. Me think me tell that they fighting just so Prime can do REAL COOL THING.

    Hey, purdy-bot RC just feel across torso strap! Me glad those nanobots not active right now. Whew! Would be embarassed Bumblebees if fellow Autobot choke on my exhaust pipe right before ....

    Scraplets! It's Megs!

    BOOM!

    Bumblebess kinda groggy. Me wake up now. Me see clik-bot getting hurted. It bad. Real bad. But, just clik-bot right?

    Me think back on Prime's stupid idea again. Sometimes he seems real white to me. Me not sure why. He all black and white and preachy. And has stupid idea. I mean, Prime's are supposed to be full of the smarts, right?

    "Only a trusted few know this, but I am going to have Omega Supreme launch the Allspark into space using the biggest energon exhaust port overload Cybertron has ever known! Only Omega Supreme is capable of this feat! Right, Omega?"

    "Omega Supreme, full of Energon. Omega Supreme, will bend over for Optimus Prime. But Optimus Prime must hurry. Omega Supreme, feels FULL!"

    Me never wants to think of that picture again.

    OK, so Megs was really mad.

    "We have much to discuss. That, and I want to EAT YOU."

    Ohhhhh, Bumbles shakin scraplets out his ball bearings now! But must act real brave like.

    "The Allspark calls out to me! Primus, do you see how LONG these fingers are! And just LOOK at this face! With or without your help I WILL have it and my extreme makeover!"

    Bumbles just lost some more scraplets. Me really stupid, but me say something smart to Pit off Megs.

    "I don't know. I couldn't tell you even if I wanted to. So, I'm afraid .... your threats mean nothing."

    Oh scraplets! Bumbles thinks Megs just grew more eyes!

    "You little servant bot! Why ....Megatron so mad. I, well, just take THAT!"

    Oh Bumbles arm just went flying away from body. That bad. That ouch. Me hate Prime now.

    Oohhhhh! Allspark flying through air! Me hear Omega!

    "Oh PRIMUS! Omega Supreme, glad Allspark finally out of Omega Supreme's exhaust port extension corridor. Omega .... relieved."

    Bumbles glad Omega feel better. But, Megs pretty pissed now (Bumbles thinking back, Bumbles use human term).

    "Aha! Prime is foolish! Though Omega's gas is mighty, I can transform into my Vroom jet mode and get it back!"

    Bumbles not like that idea. Me jump on Megs back. Bumbles think that bad idea. Mean, just LOOK how Ptting BIG Megs is.

    "Ooooohhhhh, you little scraplet. Why ... why! Ohhhhh I am SOOOOO mad right now. I am SOOOOO ripping your voice box out!"

    Bumbles get big ouchie. Bumbles go to sleep now.

    Bzzzzkkkkkttt!
    Bzzzzkkkktttt!
    Whir!
    Whir!
    Click!

    "He's a hero!"
    "He's so cool!"
    "Holy Primus! Where is his throat??!! RATCHET! stat!"

    Whirrz.
    Bzzz.
    Zak.

    Me not hero. Me pretty mad at Prime. Shooting Allspark out of Omega's port! Mean, here Bumbles all broken up, bad throat thing going on.

    Wait. RC is a NurseBot? RC touching Bumbles in good places. RC say if me go to planet called Earth, she churn my ball bearings!

    That my story so far. Me still in space. Looking like shiny human sperm thing. Me looking for matrix cube Allspark so me get tune up from RC!

    Weeeeeeeeeee!!!!
     
  6. undertaker

    undertaker Deadman's Disciple

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    Nice.
     
  7. Poho

    Poho That's MISTER Poho to you

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    im enjoying this.
     
  8. neospark1

    neospark1 Well-Known Member

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    The OTHER Transformers Movie Prologue: Part 352

    I am Megatron. Most refer to me as Lord Megatron. Those who do not, I EAT.

    I am Vrooming through Hyperspace. I Vroom for the matrix cube Allspark thingy. With it, I shall rule the Universe! With it, I can FINALLY clip these Pitting NAILS.

    With the matrix cube Allpsark thingy, I can FINALLY have my EXTREME makeover! Oh, yes indeed!

    That Bumbles made me SOOOOOOOO mad! I could have had the Cybertronian Manicure Ritual TODAY, but OH NO! That rude Autobot had the nerve to bump into me.

    The bots will still have a reason to call me rooster-bot behind my back.

    Me! MEGS!

    Well, that made me mad. I ate his throat. Tasted good, OK? What can I say, I'm a throat bot.

    Me! MEGS!

    Ahem ....

    Anywhobot, I am Vrooming through space! I will find the matrix cube Allspark thingy!

    And, and ... I'll EAT anything that gets in my way!

    What could possibly go wrong?

    To Be Continued!
     
  9. DaraRex2.0

    DaraRex2.0 I'd totally eat the leaf

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    LMAO This makes everything Hollywood is doing wrong, right. :lolol 
     
  10. neospark1

    neospark1 Well-Known Member

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    Look for the next installment when the next issue of the comic is released.

    More Bumblebee scraplets!
    MEGS eating!
    Fleshy things that go BUMP in the night.
    Maybe some other Autobots. Who knows, I mean, Bumbles is all that matters, right?!!
    And the freakiest song never to be played by Bumbles in the "official" prologue/movie.
     
  11. surak777

    surak777 Autobot Musician TFW2005 Supporter

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    rotflmao!!!!
     
  12. neospark1

    neospark1 Well-Known Member

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    The OTHER Movie Prologue CONTinUeS!

    I am MEGS! I'm Vrooming through space! I SMELL the matrix cube allpark thingy! I mean, it smells somewhat like bad exhaust gas, but I DO smell it, oh yes indeed!

    It's been a LONG trip. I've had to enterain myself for countless solar spans. It seems just like yesterday when I created my greatest song!

    "I'm Megatron Vrooming Through Space It's TRUE! Decided to become the first real Transformer Boo! Pimped up my body into my own ride. Now Don't Mess with ME Cyberfool, cause I'll EAT YOU ALIVE!"

    Ah, yes. memories. And then there was that MISERABLE Bumblebee! I just hope ripping his arm off and crushing his voice box was a lesson well learned!

    Wait a cyber nano-clik! Bumbles had that exostrut change. That was NOT his voice box, it was his, oh Pitting yes! That HAD to hurt!

    Hmmmm ... The matrix cube allspark thingy smell has gotten sooooo strong. I can practically smell Omega Supreme now.

    I want these fingenails GONE -and- that extreme makeover. Why, I think I shall just transform into robot mode with no energon and with absolutely nooooo idea what is below these puffy white things.

    BOOM!

    Well, this is not too bad. I seem to be standing on white scrpalet droppings. Wait, those are NOT scraplet droppings! Perhaps I was just a little overzealous here.

    CRACK!

    Oh, Pit me! I'm hot and heavy here and NOT in a good Arcee kind of way.

    Psssssshhhhhhh!!! CRACKLE. SNAP. POP.

    Ohhhhh heeeeere I GOOOOO!!!

    Better transform into jet mode. Wait! No Energon. Pit ME!

    I think I shall go into shock now. But first, I must quickly think of another song for history to rememeber me by.

    "Meg ... Megatron. Is that you???"
    "Here ... here ... here is a HINT!!"

    OK, cyberclumber now.

    =========]

    A WHOLE LOT OF TIME LATER. On a quaint fishing boat surrounded by pillars of ice and with lots of oatmeal being eaten by a buncha real hardy, yet loser type guys.

    It's icy. It's cold. The oatmeal is turning into a frisbee.

    The guys are all looking at one guy in particular. The guys are dressed up in many layers of clothing, and the one being stared at is wearing glasses so thick and fogged up you just HAVE to wonder how he can see anything.

    One of the guys is thinking the same thing and just HAS to ask.

    "Yeeaaarrrrg! Mr. Dim Wits! What for God's sake are ye looking at?"

    "It's shiny! So pretty! I shall axe away!" The same guy looks at Mr. Dim Wit, thinking out loud.

    "Mr' Dim Wit, we are standing on thin, cracked ice. We lost FIVE men to the horrible, horrible runs from the bad fish. We need to leave well enough alone!"

    "I just HAVE to have my precious!"

    Mr. Dim Wit pulls up his pick axe across his shoulders, cracks the ice open, and suddenly and quickly decides the runs would be just what the Doctor orders right about now.

    To BE CoNTiNuED!
     

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