Shakespeare meets TF's?

Discussion in 'Transformers General Discussion' started by Optimus_Prowl, Nov 20, 2008.

  1. Optimus_Prowl

    Optimus_Prowl I'm the Goddamed Two-Face

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    So my Shakespeare teacher for my college requested that we do something amazing for our big end of the semester project. I came back with a few scenes from the TF '86 movie rewritten; and it worked, surprisingly well. Here's the first scene I adapted into Shakespearean langauge and for use on a regular stage:


    If you guys want me to post more, I gladly will. Or just PM me for a copy of the script. My teacher requested I get feeback from the fandom so your opinions and C&C will be much appreciated.
     
  2. scarnivac

    scarnivac Well-Known Member

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    maybe it suits better in the fan-fiction area..

    it's strange to read it like this, but cool nontheless!
    though you might want to add what happend between these lines:

    KUP: "It must be moved towards the sun, just a Bit more hither -"
    "Turbo-revvin' young rap–scallion! Ye shall be punished, I swear’t."

    while we all know what happens (kup almost being run over by hotrod) most people won't..

    still a really good job so far
     
  3. Wheeljack_Prime

    Wheeljack_Prime Don't eat me

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    Optimus_Prowl, you named yourself after the wrong bots. You should have named yourself after Dinobot.
     
  4. Fairlady_Z

    Fairlady_Z Official Voice of Flareup

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    Cool! Very nice.

    All I would suggest is more stage directions. You know the scene but your teacher and class don't. Including as scarnivac said when Hot Rod smashed the barrier and when Hot Rod orginally transforms to vehicle mode.

    But this is the right board for it, I fear it would get burried in the fanfiction section as you won't get as much feedback there.
     
  5. Noise Maker

    Noise Maker Well-Known Member

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    Yeah, I echo the suggestions for more descriptions explaining what's happening. Very few people outside of us fans would know.

    And It's rather weird imagining the characters saying those lines...but it's entertaining!

    Oh, and I hope you don't have to have this moved to the fan fiction section. That's like a graveyard.
     
  6. Lock Cade

    Lock Cade Tarn Fangirl TFW2005 Supporter

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    I might sound crazy for saying this, crazy's a part of my name, but...

    This is... :bay 

    Wish I was a part of that class... I would so help you in performing it... if you had to perform a part of it, that is.
     
  7. sketchprowl

    sketchprowl freak of nature

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    Excellent... but as the others have already said, needs more stage direction for those who have not seen the original TF
     
  8. Ironhide2005

    Ironhide2005 PS3tag=DeaDPooLTFW

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    :bay 
     
  9. misternoodle

    misternoodle Banned

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    what's 'oh shit! what're we gonna do' in shakespearean?
     
  10. Aernaroth

    Aernaroth <b><font color=blue>I voted for Super_Megatron and Veteran

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    "Z'wounds! What shall our course be now?"


    There's a bunch of scenes you could do from TFTM though,


    Setting: Decepticon Throne Room

    Starscream: Cease the fanfare! Friends, Decepticons, comrades, I come not to praise Megatron, but to inter him. The evil that men do lives after them, and I shall strive boldly to continue his course as I ascend to his post!

    (Enter Cyclonus, Galvatron)

    Starscream: Who disrupts my coronation?!

    Galvatron: Coronation? This is mummery most farcical. You are but a fool, strutting upon the stage your patron has allowed you. So here, fool, YOUR APPLAUSE!

    (Shoots Starscream)



    Aaaaaand so on.
     
  11. Sideways

    Sideways Banned

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    sounds great! you should make costumes too!
     
  12. awful_gollum

    awful_gollum Well-Known Member

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    TF dialog in Shakespearean style sounds pretty interesting.:) 

    Like everyone else said, you might want to include actions that happen in between lines. So that those who haven't seen the original movie will have an idea of what's happening.

    Please do share more of this when you get around to doing so.:D 
     
  13. deltaprime

    deltaprime The Christian Transfan

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    It's well written, and it made me laugh a little. But why exactly would it go into the fanart section?
     
  14. Razorclaw

    Razorclaw Are ya gonna draw pistols

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    Great stuff. It's but a wonder that no man speaketh of want, to have the most titanic struggle between two sovereigns of our famous factions, done in such a magnificient course.
     
  15. Anodythe

    Anodythe Well-Known Member

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    You have me in stitches!!!:bowdown:  I'd love to see it done at some convention. You've a wicked good bent, I'd love to see the whole script re-written! Break a leg!
     
  16. Optimus_Prowl

    Optimus_Prowl I'm the Goddamed Two-Face

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    The reason the directions are sparse, for those who asked, is that my teacher advised to make it that way. To echo more the style of Shakespeare's writing, as if he himself would have written it.

    And thanks for all the kind words. I was not expecting this much of a response. I have scenes basically from this up to Optimus's death. I will post each scene in a different post over the next few days, and I may be inspired to write more.


    Edit: For those who are curious as to the script discovered in the globe theatre just recently I have for you another excerpt further proving that it was Shakespeare who invented the Transformers and not Micromasters (I should have used this backstory in the first post :)  )

     
  17. Pravus Prime

    Pravus Prime Sorcerer

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    Oh man, I nearly spat out my water when I read that. Brilliant.

    Optimus Prowl, you've done a good job, but consider taking some freedoms and really rewriting the dialogue, especially Perceptor, UM, and the Insecticons. (Like Aernaroth did, or even just "covering" the original dialogue a bit more completely)

    For example:

    Kickback: My mouth finds this metal most delectible, what sayest thou comrade?

    Shrapnel: While it is most savory, the heavyness of the electrons diminishes the fullness of flavor friend.
     
  18. scarnivac

    scarnivac Well-Known Member

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    how cool is it, that this line doesn't need any changing? xD

    can't wait to read more of the 'Transpeare Movieverse'!
     
  19. GigatronSama

    GigatronSama Mr. Insomnia Veteran

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    I'm pretty sure that "This is bad comedy" is already a quote from one of Shakespeare's works.
     
  20. Lock Cade

    Lock Cade Tarn Fangirl TFW2005 Supporter

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    I especially love Soundwave speaking Shakespearean. Nice touch :thumb 
     

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