I hear you there. Except my hijinks weren't quite as obviously or immediately lethal... kinda. I grew up on a farm, we had steep hills. I used to roam them like a mountain goat. I look back now and think of cliffs and hills I climbed and shudder. But one time, when I was 8-10, we'd had some rain and as would happen, one of the steep hills nearby had the grass come away over a 4-5m stretch. So my nephew and I were sliding down it on our butts, scrambling back up and sliding down it again. We were trying to go faster and faster, but similarly counting faster... in the end, I threw myself from the top of the slip, flew down it, hit the bottom and bent my knees into a crouch. Stood up immediately afterwards - wrong thing to do before I had killed my forward momentum, and I realised this a moment too late - I leapt off the top of this hill. Just went right out far and wide, and began a slow somersault down towards the extremely shallow creek at the very bottom of the hill, I knew if I hit that I was a goner... but somehow, about 3m from the creek, I got stuck sideways in a sheep track. I got up, walked home, couldn't stop shaking. I was so freaked afterwards, even freakier was I wasn't even bruised. And all I can remember is this weird calm as the world spun around me, and thinking, "well, if I'm gonna die, it's a nice way to go." Like there was nothing I could do, so I just relaxed and was ready to die. The thought, and the reasoning behind it, scared the crap out of me much later. But the incident now, I just chuckle at, because I was an idiot as a kid (not much better now, but NOT throwing myself off the top of hills anymore)
I think the only time LOL about something scary was when I was in grade 7 shop class. I was cutting something on a Saw when some guys goofing around bumped into me and my thumb went right into the saw, nearly cutting it clean off. The adrenaline kicked in and I began to laugh like I was psycho or something. When I was being rushed to the Nurses office, people were looking out of their classroom and seeing me laugh like a maniac and leaving a trail of blood behind me.
I thought of one! One time when I was about 6 years old my cousin locked me in a room (just for like a minute for a harmless prank) when the power had gone out. I was so freaked out, I ran to the door and started frantically pounding on it for him to let me out, so much so that I ended up punching myself in the face so hard a tooth fell out. I don't know why but that seems hilarious now, thinking back on it beatrush that's crazy, I assume your thumb came out ok?
All of mine were while in the Army in the 18th Airborne Div.-You'd be amazed on how many people are injured/killed in the service just due to accidents. Fort Bragg, NC: During a jump I had a guy land on my parachute almost calapsing it-not good! Fort Bragg, NC: During a night jump where windy conditions should have called off the jump, we got blown way off course and several of us ended up in trees. Fortunately I didn't, I just got a one hundred yard drag accross the field... Pope Airforce Base, NC: Waiting in the tarmac with the rest of my company for yet another jump when our Cpt. just happens to look out the window to see an F-16 that was coming in for a landing collide with a C-130. He tells us to drop our gear and get the hell out! We do and run like hell as I can feel the heat from the burning jet fuel on my back. MAJOR EXPLOSION!! I round the corner of a brick building and see a wall of flame rush in the direction that I was just running. Several guys I was in the tarmac got burnt up pretty badly. 24 soldiers killed, over 100 injured. Our Cpt. saved many lives that day needless to say as the tarmac we were in was completely destroyed. Still get flash backs of that day whenever I hear a loud boom or blast. http://www.af.mil/news/story.asp?storyID=123007282
We just got that movie for my daughter. It came as a double feature on one disc with the sequel, my wife and I agreed to tell my daughter there is only one movie on there. That sequel would scare the piss out of me. Last year after our son learned to walk we realized it was TOO quiet. It had only been a few minutes but kids can get into trouble FAST. I start going from room to room calling for him, I can kind of hear him but I can't figure out where he is..Trapped in closet? Buried under stuffed animals? Wrapped up in a blanket and suffocating, by the time I went into full panic and yelled at my wife "I CAN'T FIND HIM" we realize were he is. The little bastard (i mean that with love) had climbed onto the bathroom counter and was sitting in the sink. Just chilling, smiling and laughing at me. I must have looked in there and saw he wasn't on the tub and didn't even look at the counter.
This one time overseas, I was riding in the back of a Bradley. We'd dropped our infantry squad earlier to do their thing, and we were positioning for overwatch when we hit a roadside bomb. The back of the Bradley was full of smoke, so I couldn't really seen anything, but I could tell there was a fire in the driver's compartment. Without the driver, the ramp can't be lowered, and the door handle was jammed or something, so I tried to pop the top hatch. But the turret was at six o'clock, so it went up about three inches and hit the barrel of the main gun--just enough for me to see the crew running away. One stayed long enough to shout, "You okay, doc?" to which I replied, "Fuck no!" Realized later they were just running to get a tanker bar from the other Bradley to wedge the door open for me, but I was so damn terrified I got it open on my own. I know I'm not strong enough to bend steel, but that adrenaline had me going pretty good. I've been pretty close to death a coupla other times, all overseas. Just laugh about 'em now, 'cause what else are you gonna do, y'know? I mean, besides drink. I do that a lot too.
I have a few recent ones where I was scared shitless. First, I was in my room on my laptop, and out of the corner of my eye I see something on my windowsill. I think it's a sandish colored snake and I almost fall over, but it was just a bird. Another was when I was walking my neigbor's dogs the other day, and one gets off it's collar (Small little guys). I'm so frightened that it would just run off and I'd be responsible for my neigbors' lost dog, feeling very embarrased and guilty. Thank God that it finally stopped when I ran after it into a neighbor's back yard.
This'll probably make me sound like a smug asshole, although I don't mean too. But reading your post immediately after mine made me
I think most of the posts following yours would make the person look like a pansy. I guess I can understand a fear of birds after a Lorokeet at the Long Beach Aquarium bit into my fucking ear.
Dumb luck + shitty bomb + 'spaced laminate armor' = WIN. Oh, and hey, way to go with clever quoting, jackass
I was hit by a motorcycle in 2005. When I stood up (by myself, I'm a tough man) I searched for my glasses. I saw them being smashed by a bus. Thank god I was able to fix it, I'm still using them. I don't LOL about it, but everyone LOL'ed at me when I arrived at work that day. Those motherf*ckers. I'd hit each and every one of them with a bike if I had one.
