Precisely. Parenting is hypocrisy, and it's for their own good. Show me ONE parent who's never lied to their child, and I'll show you one who wasn't there. Do you have any better ideas?
Lying to the child for their own good is one thing, of course a parent who has tried drugs isn't going to admit that to a child. You were suggesting that he lie to his wife/gf, which would be a big mistake IMO. Really, since he isn't the kids biological father the mother should be making all of the punishment decisions until the kid comes to accept and respect him as a father.
As I said before, i'd love to beat the s**t outta him. But he's my stepson, and i can't do that. So mom,dad,and me are gonna have a long talk with him on saturday. Also he's not allowed to watch tv, no games, not even a radio. And all his toys are going away. Mom is tired of his crap to, so she'll cooperate with me on this, I don't really want to kick him out of the house, though I believe the threat will scare him enough.
You could always scar him for life. You know, pull him aside in a hallway and whisper into his ear "I'm fuckin' your mom."
That is the best one yet! Another thing you could do is take something of his that he really enjoys. Say, his favorite video game, CD, something, anything. Now, when he comes asking for it, tell him you sold it. If after some time he comes around and ends the stealing, give it back to him.
I told him before I sold some of his things, and he was like "ok". Mom does understand the problem, she just can't see a solution to it. And his dad is no help either...... Maybe I'll have the cops come by and explain things to him....
This may work. Call the cops next time he does this and explain to them when they get there the situation, 5 mintues in cuffs in the back of a cruiser will make his outlook change.
that is a great idea.. Make him sweat it out in the back of a police car for about 5 minutes. kinda like a scared straight..
I wouldn't lie to my kid, I'd think it sets a bad example. Where does this kid live? With his Dad? My odious suspicion is perhaps he's getting some sort of validation from his real Dad, ('Wow, Sunstorms got some great Yugi oh cards' 'Yeah? Well, he's a grown adult, I'm sure you can take them.') I'm not party to your situation or anything, but thats one thought that cropped up in my head. Failing that, I'd just as soon either a) beat the crap outta him (hey, at least violence is honest) or b) Never let him in my house again. If you were actually responsible for parenting the kid, then it would be different, but you're not, he's obviously not listening to you as an adult responsible for his welfare, so you may as well treat him as a stranger, and kick him outta the house. Wanna visit Mommy? Yes? Really? Get the fuck outta here you little prick and stop stealing my stuff.
Based on age, a parent is gonna be more likely to lie to a younger child about something like that, where parents of an older teenager would be more willing to admit to it and then explain how it was a mistake, unless they still love doing drugs and want to get the kids involved too..... This is all speculation though, we still have no clue how old this kid is.....
I think this is the best idea yet. Like others have said, if you actually catch him stealing, you could, when he's not aware, phone the police and let them know that you have a thief in the house (or something along those lines.) Or, if you know folks on the police force, you could ask one of them to come out and spook the kid by questioning him about recent theft of property (or something like that.) Law has a profound and sobering effect on people ages 12-15, at least in my experience. Here's hoping something like that helps.
I think you'd find that if you ask, the police would be happy to come talk to the kid. They'd rather talk to them when they're young, than have to arrest them when they're teenagers.
Yeah, give him a healthy dose of respect for the law. I think someone else said this already, but if you can't parent the kid, then treat him like you would anyone else who'd steal stuff from your home- call the police.
Does he get any allowance? You should take a dollar from him for every one item he takes from you. Or take one toy of his for every one item of yours. He'll realize what he is doing wrong when he loses something he cares about.
I'd try the police idea. That is unless you end up with the prick cop that will arrest the kid anyways for petty theft, rather than just the scare factor.
