ITT: Personal Fails - An ode to Idiocy

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by TrueNomadSkies, Jul 3, 2012.

  1. TrueNomadSkies

    TrueNomadSkies Airachnid's ratservant

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    So basically, what're some of the dumbest things we've done/seen in irl, or that have otherwise happened in real life? I'm not talking about stuff we've seen on Tosh.0 or read about online, but events that've actually gone down.

    For example, I had this neighbor a while back who was kinda crazy, and one day he thought it'd be cool for us to jump off the roof of his cabin into a pile of snow. This was actually pretty tame compare to some of the other stuff that him & his brother claimed to have done (such as drugging a bull & cutting off its balls at night), but nevertheless I wasn't game.

    Turns out that harmless pile of snow was actually a pile of firewood, the dude broke his arm, and I came out of the situation a mere pussy for my lack of efforts. Nothing spectacular by any stretch, but I'm sure some other people will have that covered sooner than later. :lol 
     
  2. Starscream600

    Starscream600 Certified Virtual Pilot

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    My dumbest thing I've done so far?

    Pressing the eject button at the drop of the track.

    Dumbest thing I've done by far.
     
  3. Dran0n

    Dran0n Junk male

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    > Making macaroni
    > Going pretty good
    > Time to straighten this shit
    > Grab pot handle
    > Hell know no hotter flame
    > ohshitminority.jpg
    > Drop pot like it's actually fucking hot
    > Noodles and water splash everywhere
    > Spaghetti starts falling out of pocket
    > feelsbatman.jpg

    Best I could come up with. I don't engage enough socially and I'm a gigantic wuss. I guess there was the time when...

    > Out with friends
    > Decide to have a snowball fight
    > Make epic snowball
    > Thing was seriously bitching
    > Toss at stupid friend
    > Direct hit
    > feelsgoodman.jpg
    > Friend comes up to me with my phone
    > Back plate of month old iPhone 4S shattered
    > Must've fallen out of pocket, hit concrete
    > This is why we can't have nice things


    ITT: Asshole tries to greentext.
     
  4. Starscream600

    Starscream600 Certified Virtual Pilot

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    :lol  Order that new back plate man!
     
  5. TrueNomadSkies

    TrueNomadSkies Airachnid's ratservant

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    Haha, that text's good. It'd have been worse if you'd gone with the darkest blue possible, and I think there's somebody on here who does that, and as a result, I can never read anything they say without highlighting.


    Also, and while again this isn't anything big in the grand scheme of things, I did something pretty stupid to my car last year, and you'll probably be able to guess what it was after reading the 1st sentence of my story.

    Basically, I had an old dryer that belonged to my uncle or cousin that my dad & I were gonna drop off at one of those "we'll take your crap for parts" places, and since my mom kept bitching about it, I decided to take it there myself instead of waiting for my dad to get home.

    I figured that since I carried the thing around before & put it into my car just fine, that I'd have no problems taking it out. Problem was that I didn't account for the damn thing being greasy & getting caught on the tarp, and on the way down one of the brackets took a chunk outa my bumper. I spent at least 50 bucks on supplies (paint, primer, clear, putty, etc), and since I didn't really have the best place to work & since I was kinda wingin' it, this took me like a week to finish, and its still not as smooth as it was outa the factory.

    On a positive note, a bunch of toys came from Dr. Prime that day, so it wasn't all bad hah.
     
  6. Wrecker217

    Wrecker217 Heart Like a Hand Grenade

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    My friend tried to do a hands free front flip into the pool the other day. He broke his nose.
     
  7. Satomiblood

    Satomiblood Prototype Black

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    At my old job 7 years ago....

    When I was unloading a palette of milk off a dairy truck, one of the milk crates caught on to part of a door and 3/4 of the load came crashing down. There was milk everywhere.
     
  8. Squee

    Squee Well-Known Member

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    Had a bad break up with an ex... Next day i was cutting 1 x 1 inch pieces of wood for railing on a deck. The customer had 1.5 x 1.5 inch originally but she complained she felt it was too thick... So while trimming down 50 or so pieces of this, it got kind of repetitious and at the same time my mind started thinking about the bs i was dealing with. I feel a pinch at my finger tips and pull back, luckily just in time. My left hand pointer and middle finger tips got cut pretty bad, with the edge of the tip of my middle finger hanging off. I walk over to my boss at the time and say "hey look at my hand" holding both hands up. He looks to my right one, and i say, "no the other" as blood is pouring out of my finger tips.

    I wrapped em up and went back to work. I should have went to the hospital in hindsight, but thankfully they healed up just fine. I have 2 fine scars that hurt a little every once in awhile, but at least i still have feeling in them. Probably the stupidest thing i've done in the past 10 years or so.
     
  9. 2ndSndWve

    2ndSndWve Hen... Shin!

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    :lolol 
     
  10. UnicronHound

    UnicronHound Well-Known Member

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    The idiotic things I've done really is where/how I've fallen. Like going to shoo the cats from scratch the door, and twisting my ankle/falling because I kept a popsicle mesh baggie, and slipped on it. Had some REAL funny scooting to where I could be put on the stretcher. I've done a couple personal dumb things that I'll never share here, or anywhere, but my falls are the dumbest things I've done.
     
  11. Tyrant

    Tyrant Zombie

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    My husband poked some freshly made (re: very, very insanely hot) taffy once with his finger for some reason and wound up running around the kitchen in circles with it literally smoking as he screamed. He had a peanut sized blister but miraculously it didn't scar.
     
  12. transtrekkie

    transtrekkie On the level.

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    Oh I can win this thread: Last year I drove without insurance, got into an accident with two other vehicles, had to pay several thousands of dollars in damages and fines, had to borrow money from relatives and am now so far up to my ass in debt that I had to sell my entire toy collection and will still be in debt for years to come. The moral of the story? Don't let you car insurance lapse.
     
  13. Nightwind

    Nightwind Aka Dusty Bottoms.

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    IcyHot on testicles isn't as humorous as it seems...
     
  14. TrueNomadSkies

    TrueNomadSkies Airachnid's ratservant

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    Well, not if its on your balls, anyway...
     
  15. jorod74

    jorod74 Psycholagnist (Ret.)

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    when my sight clouded up really bad last week, i got my niece to take me to Walmart for some items. more than once in there, i grabbed an item, then put it in a cart that was not mine, or started talking to who i thought was my niece.

    but the worst was walking into a clothes rack because i was trying to avoid a customer.
     
  16. GFH

    GFH The G Squad

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    I was in drama class in early April building a mock stage out of cardboard with a group. I was manning the hot-glue gun, and I was basically making the structure of the mini stage. The class is only forty minutes, so I was rushing near the end. I had one piece left, a strip of cardboard about a foot long, a little would-be hedge. I very quickly ran the gun up and down the piece, then turned it over to stick it onto the stage. Of course the piece was only an inch wide, so when I turned it over, the end with the glue brushed my hand. Normally this wouldn't be a problem, I'm no baby, and I knew that hot glue comes right off. It stung for a second, then cooled down. I attached the piece then tended to my hand. A lump of glue had attached itself to the little finger of my left hand. I dug my right index finger under it and peeled it off... along with the skin underneath. Turns out it was an industrial grade hot glue gun, which much hotter than your kindergarten-variety glue gun. The burn was infected by the end of the week, and I was unable to write any notes for class for about a month.

    Whoops.
     
  17. seali_me

    seali_me Well-Known Member

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    I just got back home after 2 trips back and forth to that intersection. I'll explain.

    I was already half pissed cause they closed my exit and I had not only had to take another autoroute to only go back to the same one but the only one exit available was already across town on the east side. Near my area, this fucktard was high beaming and tail gating me at the same time. At the intersection, he had the fucking nerve to actually honk at me. So I got the fuck out of the car and had a short argument with, guess what it was fucking kid in early 20's. Even though I really wanted to just vent off my fists at his face on the pavement and I decided to just walk away. Not knowing my Iphone fell right smack in the middle of both lanes, an intersection of all things. Yeah I got it back and by a miracle, no damage or anything.
     

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