well I haven't been on here in a couple days becaue I had a very difficult doctors appointment. After a painful examination the doctors told me to get dressed and have me and my husband meet him in his office.....
uh oh, he had found another large tumor on my right ovary and Ithought I wuld have to have surgery again.
What he said was that this disease is officially killing me..I'm dying.
He wants me to get a full hystorectomy as soon as possible.
I declined....now please no stupid remarks about think about your son think about your life etc.
my husband and I have been trying for a second child for four years. It is a feeling like our family is incomplete despite us having one child.
We haven't yet tried IVF (It's expensive and difficult to extract eggs from tumor filled ovaries and with the meds I'm on but it is possible)
I just don't want to pull the trigger on my hopes and dreams yet.
I realize there is adoption. I have friends who have adopted sucessfully and ones that had to give the baby back after the mother changed her mind. I just couldn't emotionally go thourgh that.
When I was pregnant with my son it was the happiest time in my life I took better care of my body then I ever had. It's why I didn't gian weight during my pregnancy because I was techincially losing weight from eating right and excerizing.
The doctor said that I have two years. THings are bad and in two years they aren't sure where I will be and deicisions will need to be made within that time frame. They aren't even sute chemo or the meds are working anymore. Have another surgery and another is just over the horizon.
There is still debate about whether or not to do another surgery on my right ovary. My body is so filled with pain filled scar tissue that another surgery might be worse than better.
Lots of crying in the appointment. My hudband didn't though, he didn't say much of anything.
The doctor said that my decision isn't a rational or intellectual one..it's an emotional one.

 

Holy shit. I'm so sorry  

 

I...I don't know what to say...

 

Not much to say without coming off like a complete cold bastard, but do consider other medical options that have been presented to you. Having one child and a life is much better, no matter how you look at it, than not having a second one and not being around.

There are alternative treatments for your condition, make sure you get a second or even third medical opinion and opt for experimental treatments. My friend's mother was saved because of that.

 

Damn that's rough, i hope your cancer/tumors can be cured.

I do agree to a point with the doctor that there is a lot of emotion going into your decision.

I am not a doctor and nor did I stay at a Holiday Inn express last night so i will not try to advise you but i will pray for you and your family.

 

So how the hell are you going to explain to your son that in 2 years he won't have a mom because he isn't good enough to fulfill all of your emotional needs?

 

I am so sorry.  

Stay strong and keep a positive attitude.

You're in my thoughts ans prayers.

 

Ouch dude. Have a little respect.

Sorry to hear the news.  

 

You have the prayers of all around. Do what you can.

 

Well, does she want everyone to agree with her? Cause that aint gonna happen. Get the surgery and get over it. Its a no brainer. Ive had deal friends die of cancer and if they couldve gottan a surgery to fix it all and not die, I'm sure they wouldve done that. Look at this way, your little boy needs his mom.

Now if this was terminal either way, then yeah, a little sympathy, but as you state-this is not the case. You have an chance-use it.

 

So...it's actually treatable...and all you have to do is sign off on a procedure that your doctor is strongly advocating? Am I reading this right?

 

I can totally relate I am 34 and was in remission and found out last week my cancer is coming back and new treatment will be needed I have 3 kids and am strong for them cancer is a scary disease especially for family. I am offering a shoulder to cry on or to talk to I am here please feel free to PM anytime. I truly believe it is better to face this disease together and it is always good to talk to others going through the same situations it has helped me greatly. Good luck in all in your future and you will be in my prayers.......

 

This is a very sensitive issue. I'd advise the utmost respect and positivity here, and even go the extra mile and send a private message with your thoughts, hope and reasoning. Use some common sense and don't just say "Well, she posted it here, so I have a right to talk about it here." Unfortunately, most will not have ever had to endure this kind of emotional distress, so all you can do is drop everything you're doing and make a concentrated, honest effort to walk a mile in her shoes and perhaps then you'll realize the Golden Rule would be a good one to follow at this moment.

 

I totally understand where you're coming from. I'm sure you love your husband and son dearly, but in the end, you have to do whats best for you.

My thoughts and prayers will be with you and yours.

 

afraid I have to agree here- no reason not to get it if it means you won't be around in 2 years. the fact you treated yourself better when you were pregnant has nothing to do with it. To me it sounds like you have some type of depression the way you are clinging to the hope of another child while your young one and your husband have to essentially watch you die in front of them. Not a lot of sympathy coming from me in that respect. I have a feeling that this thread will get locked asap due to the divisive nature of the topic. that being said, I wish you the best and hope for your recovery.

 

Don't wait get the surgery. Cancer isn't fun, been there done that, but time is the enemy. The disease is trying to take over. Even after your cured, you never really get over what you went through, it's always there at the back of your mind. But it does get better. And you will get better after the cancer is gone.

 

Gotta echo this. Literally choosing death as it'll stop you having another child doesn't make any sense to me at all.

 

I agree with this. Pardon me for the usual bluntness, but letting yourself die because you can't have a second child is stupid, selfish, and short-sighted.

Get the surgery and pull through for the family you have. You're throwing yourself off a bridge otherwise.

 

M, I'm saying this with all the love in the world. Get the surgery.

 

Thoughts and prayers are with you, I'm so sorry to see this.

Do what you feel is best for you and your family.