Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Erector, Apr 24, 2008.
Penis theft panic hits city
Wow... just wow.
Holy shit, I'm going there in November.
Or rather, I was planning on it. I MAY HAVE TO RECONSIDER.
It's fun to point and laugh and say "Ha, those silly Congolese, look what they're doing now!"
Thirty men are dead.
Hehe, go home and try it...
Black Magic is real.
Me, I'm headed there on a medical aid mission.
But in the meantime, what else are we supposed to do about it? Yeah, it's a shame people are dying, and I don't think anybody's celebrating that fact. But the story is a little ridiculous and funny independent of the unfortunate loss of life.
Oh, and in the interest of full disclosure, not only do I regularly laugh about sick and dying people, once I played a trick on somebody with a man's severed arm. And I don't feel bad about any of it.
I would play tricks on people with body parts but sadly I lack the necessary access to said pieces
I admit, given the context of the piece, i LOLed. And I didn;t see anywhere about people dieing from it...
Fifteen suspected wizards have been lynched, it doesn't say how many have died.
The last time this happened (there has been more than one penis-stealing wizard scare in Congo), the death toll was two dozen.
You're telling me that despite the (again, unfortunate) loss of life you can actually type this sentence with a completely straight face and not find it even a little funny?
Ok, I missed that bit, fair enough...
I met a few girls that had similar penis shrinking effects on my penis.
This story, I must know it.
On the bright side, being known for penis stealing wizards is a step up from 10 years of being the African capital of warfare and tribal violence.
Ah, it's really not as good as it sounds.
We had this captain in a unit attached to us overseas that was OBSESSED with ground-guiding, which is where you have to have a man using hand-signals to direct you when you back up. Apparently, he'd fallen asleep in the shade of a Humvee once when he was younger and it had driven above him (literally, it didn't actually run over him him) because they didn't use a ground guide.
But he NEVER would. And it pissed me off. So I took some Afghani's arm out of the biohazard bag (it had come off it some explosion, I don't remember the details 'cause they all kinda blur together) and wedged it under his back right tire late at night. So when he left the TOC and backed up his Humvee to go back to the tents, he ran over a *bump.* He got out to check it and saw, well, a human arm in a soldier's uniform (I'd cut off a sleeve from one of mine for it to wear).
Obviously, he freaked out. I mean, freaked out. I'm not sure if he was more freaked before he realized it was a trick or after. But he lost it.
So did he start using a ground guide? Fuck no.
But it was hilarious. Or at least, it was when I was on a crazy hair trigger all the time for a six month period. Now I look back and question my actions. A little. Not that much. Well, really not at all.
The captain could run, though. Like two miles in under 11 minutes. That's the only other thing I remember about him.
Remind me to never get on your bad side, especially when you have access to body parts.
That's what she said! LOL, I'm so immature
0.0 im not going nere congo
So...do you think the police have been collecting photographic evidence?
Ah, but are you going near the Congo? That, I believe, is the issue.
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