How Do You Convince The Wife Or Significant Other To Let You Keep Buying Toys?

Discussion in 'Transformers Toy Discussion' started by GrimlockAutobot, May 23, 2008.

  1. GrimlockAutobot

    GrimlockAutobot Me No Bozo Me King!!

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    Let me just say I'm a regular guy. I have the mortgage, bills, cars, kids, etc.
    All of this responsiblity makes it difficult to convince the wife to keep letting me buy TFs.

    I've tried pretty much everything in the book. I've done the "I'll do INSERT CHORE I'VE BEEN NEGLECTING HERE if you let me buy this"

    I've also done the "I'll let you buy the INSERT SOMETHING SHE'S BEEN WANTING THAT'S REALLY EXPENSIVE HERE if you let me buy this toy.

    Or the "I'll do whatever you want me to around the house for a week if you let me but this toy."

    But, that approach is getting kinda old and stale. So how do you get your toys? How do you convince your significant other to let you buy all this great stuff if you have bills to pay?

    I need some help because $100 on one TF is probably my limit so that probably leaves Henkei Thundercracker out of the question for me.

    Please help!!
     
  2. Optimus Kharnal

    Optimus Kharnal Well-Known Member

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    My wife knows that collecting transformers is something that I really enjoy, so I really don't have to convince her to let me buy some especially in the deluxe/voyager range.
     
  3. Counterpunch?

    Counterpunch? Interior Renovator

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    I can't even relate to your situation.

    For one, my relationship with my lady is genuinely equitable. There is no 'dragging by the hair' nor is there any 'vice grip on the balls'. We work together and that's why we've had seven years together.

    I do think that the whole way our relationship works came from each of us sticking up for ourselves in the very beginning. If any woman told me how to spend my money I would literally laugh in her face. I'd expect her to do the same to me if I was being like that.

    You're going to draw a lot of "do whatever the hell you want, be a man damnit!' type responses. I'm not sure how else anyone is supposed to help you though.

    You just need to be able to stick up for yourself more, or admit that your budget doesn't allow for the kind of purchasing you want to do. Eitherway, cram some honesty into the equation and see what comes out.
     
  4. Malach Ra

    Malach Ra TFW2005 Supporter

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    I dont have a bank account with her. I dont tell her, plain and simple. what she doesnt know wont hurt her. just dont get yourself in a bind where you have to tell her. be smart about it.
     
  5. adamthered

    adamthered Reads comics. Starts shit

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    I figure once I've paid all the bills, helped pay off some of our debt, and everything is up to snuff, what's left over I can do whatever I see fit.

    Tell her at least you're not wanting to spend you cash on booze, broads, and blow :) 
     
  6. GrimlockAutobot

    GrimlockAutobot Me No Bozo Me King!!

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    We have a great relationship my wife and I.....I don't usually have to go out of my way to get a toy......she usually gets it for me.....she's even ripped into boxes at wal-mart for me when I wasn't there.

    But, as my collection gets bigger and money gets tighter with gas prices etc. it's been taking a little more convincing lately.
     
  7. GrimlockAutobot

    GrimlockAutobot Me No Bozo Me King!!

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    I've said someting to the same effect: "At least I'm not a crack addict or a heavy drinker.......or bet our money on the horses"
     
  8. cappeca

    cappeca wtf is this?

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    The best approach is to set up a monthly budget (or weekly, according to the regularity of paychecks). You could mathematically prove that it wouldn't interfer with anything else, and would still be affordable. It also helps educating our own compulsion and anxiety, and keeps our significant other with their mouth shut, since you're always under that safe zone. You can always save from the previous month for the next to buy something expensive (like Henkei TC), or you can always buy something expensive now on the credit card and not buy anything for the next 2-3 months. Stick to that for a year, and show your wife how you did so, and eventually she'll understand you're responsible enough to manage your own money :D  I know from experience.
     
  9. Optimus Layne

    Optimus Layne Autobot Commander

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    tell her that if she lets you buy some that you will buy her her very own transformer....[​IMG]
     
  10. sixshot2K

    sixshot2K Soundwave is #1!

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    I have no wife so thers your answer
     
  11. defstar

    defstar Autobot...

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    Same here...as long as I don't go overboard there is no problem...


    All I can say is give yourself a budget each month and stick to it...and if it's something you enjoy she should be understanding...
     
  12. Deceptigtar

    Deceptigtar Sworn Decepticon Assassin

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    i agree with the budgets theories, but also at the same time. you work i am sure and work hard like most of us and wish we had unlimited funds to spend, but most of us dont.

    at the same time, if you are contributing to your families responsibilities and they are covered, save a little from each check that is your own money. that way over time you can afford bigger items or alot of smaller items. i dont think every hard earned dollar needs to be thrown all in to the family pot as long as those expenses are covered.
     
  13. hotspot_2001

    hotspot_2001 Well-Known Member

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    My wife is the financially irresponsible one in our relationship so it is not difficult for me to justify my spending on toys. We kind of take the approach of once all the bills are paid she can spend all of her money on whatever she wants and I will take care of saving and planning etc.. since I make a good bit more than her. Then it's up to me to decide how much of my extra money to spend or save or use for major purchases or whatever.

    I just set a budget for myself on how much I'm going to spend on toys each month and then I don't have to worry about what I spend becoming a problem because I've already crunched the numbers and know it's ok to spend.
     
  14. Smokescreen

    Smokescreen The Ultimate Gambler TFW2005 Supporter

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    My wife fully supports my TF collecting. She sometimes actually tries to get me to buy more TFs than I originally planned on getting. But, I always do so on within our budget. If I don't have the money to spend, then I don't buy TFs.
     
  15. nkelsch

    nkelsch Do you know this Icon? TFW2005 Supporter

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    I had a response but the browser ate it. I don't have the strength to redo it.

    Simply put, discuss finances. Bribing or begging like you comments are a little weird for an adult male to be making with his wife. "Ill do my chore if you buy me a toy" is what a 6 year old does.

    If money is tight, then no TFs should be bought without both buy in. If you have plenty of fun-money then make a budget and agree to both of you getting X$ a month for WHATEVER. And then you guys can buy whatever you want with it.

    Or turn collecting into a father/son hobby if you have a son.

    I am never blanketly going to agree that collecting TFs is always a good thing and Wives are always wrong on this issue. There are many people who probably shouldn't be collecting TFs when they start putting their personal happiness before their families wellbeing.
     
  16. Deefuzz

    Deefuzz Beard On! Beardmaster! Veteran

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    I live with my girlfriend and we bought a house together. When we did that we opened a joint checking account that we use as the "house account" I put x amount of every paycheck into the account to cover my half of mortgage and all the bills related to the house (satellite, phone, water, etc). The rest of the money from each paycheck is in my personal account which I then use for my credit card bill, car payment, cell phone, and insurance, and I use the rest as I see fit.

    She is a collector as well so we both have the mind of "it's YOUR money do whatever you want with it". As long as we are able to pay our portion of the bills and mortgage we really don't care what the other spends their money on. It's a matter of trust and allowing your significant other to be who they are.

    She understands the collector mentality though so I guess it makes it a little easier. The only downfall of that is that we have ALOT of clutter. Her brother lives with us too and he is also a collector, so our house is just full of boxes of all sorts of figures.

    But she has no problem doing what makes me happy as long as my financial obligations are met, and I feel the same way.
     
  17. GrimlockAutobot

    GrimlockAutobot Me No Bozo Me King!!

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    I know it sounds like I'm being a 6-year-old but, the kinds of "chores" I'm talking about are manly ones that usually every man procrastinates on I.E. Treating the wood fence around our house or caulking outside....or fixing something....the kind that most wives beg you to do every weekend but, you try to get out of it.

    I just happen to use it to my advantage to get her to go along with spending some of our joint money on toys.
     
  18. ANDROID PRIME

    ANDROID PRIME Well-Known Member

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    just make sure she and your family are your first priority. transformers are fun but you have to make sure they know that they are way more important. then you shouldnt have any problems
     
  19. Razerwire

    Razerwire 99 Problems... Super Mod

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    When she said 'I do' she no longer had any argument. :D 
     
  20. Night Flame

    Night Flame TFW2005 Supporter

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    If you feel you have to convince her, you're doing it wrong.

    I've been told many, many times by people that the way my wife and I do our finances just creates unnecessary work. However, those people are embroiled in fights and battles with their SOs every week or two about how to spend their money. We've never had a fight about how to spend money. Not once.

    Here's how we did it:
    1 - Joint account. All wages that do not go to the other accounts.
    2 - individual accounts. Each of these get equal amounts of money from the joint account at the same time. In our case, 200 every two weeks to each account, plus the odd "bonus" when there's a work bonus or any unexpected windfall.

    The money in the joint accounts pays all bills, and covers all household and joint activities. The money in our individual accounts covers our individual expenses, whether that's gifts for each other, or things for ourselves. We have no say in how the other spends the money in their own account, though we talk about it because, really, there's no reason to hide things from each other.

    That's our way of dealing with the question of, "what if I want to buy a toy?" or "what if she wants to buy a new Barbie?" or any number of other things. You need to sit down with your SO and figure out a method that works for you that allows you to share your money without any one of you being able to destroy the joint finances. We figured this out when we were still at the dating stage, and we've never seen a reason to change it because it just plain works for us. But the bottom line is, whatever you do, it needs to be a joint decision. And it's best to make it a long-term decision. If you have to beg and plead each time you want something, that's a bad situation, and something that should be dealt with in some manner other than continuing to beg and plead every time you want something.
     

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