Basically just what the title says. I'm interested to know if anyone else feels like my wife and I feel. I am thirty, she's twenty-eight but we haven't made a decision one way or the other. All we know is we don't want kids anytime soon. Now I know we have plenty of time, but I was curious have any of you with your spouses or significant others have actually made the conscious decision not to have them? If so, how did you arrive at that decision?

It's funny, when I was young I always assumed I would have kids, but as I get older I seem to be moving further and further away from that mindset. I also look to other big events in my past for guidance. For instance, I knew I was going to college, no question. Same thing with marriage, I knew I was going to marry my (then) girlfriend, no doubt in my mind. But when it comes to having kids I have some serious doubts and I'm just not sure I want to go there. It's great for people that do want them, but I'm not sure that is me.

What are your thoughts?

 

I don't have to worry about it. Society's already told me that I'm incapable of finding a potential mate.
Seriously, though, lots of people don't have children, it's not that big of a deal. Just remember that you grew up with parents who did have children, and raised you with the idea of having children.

 

I have decided not to, no matter what happens, but my reasons are many and not something I care to delve into beyond saying after years dialysis and a kidney transplant I have learned that living on borrowed time takes its toll.. on both the wallet and the soul.

As well as I can't trust that the world the world my generation leaves behind will be... suitable.

In short I guess I have grown far too.. tired.

 

While that might be ok for right now, what happens in 10 years when she changes her mind, or you for that matter, do you really wanna be wearing diapers or need a walker to go to your kids graduation? You are both 30(ish)now, time is defintely not on your side for a decision like this. Hard thinking needs to be done in the next 3-5 years. Having a baby really takes it toll on both partners, moreso the ladies of course, and doing that in your forties probably won't be fun or easy.  

 

I've decided not to have children.



Of course that decision came to me 3 kids too late. 

 

im Still Young (15) but i have already decided to Not have Kids (and stay Single)

 

*raises hand* I never wanted kids. Of course life sometimes throws a kink into such plans. My wife and I will never have children together (tubes tied), but she already had a son when we got together (the reason they were tied). So no I never want to have more of me running around (one is enough thank you very much), but I still get the joy of corrupting....err raising the next generation. He already loves Transformers. In fact, we are both getting to go to Botcon for the first time this year! My wife as well of course. She puts up with my obsess.....err I mean hobby. She's always teasing me about needing more room for all our books cause my transformers are taking up two full sets of shelves in our bedroom (and the top two bookshelves in the living room).

At that point I just remind her that if we didn't have so many D&D and other RPG gaming books we'd have more room for novels as well.


Out

 

I've decided to get Married (mainly because I don't want to be alone in life) and wouldn't mind a Family in my Distant Future.

 

After having to deal with my brother's kids, my sister's kids.....I've decided I don't want em either.......

 

Same here  

Seriously, love my kids but man are they exhausting.

They've each been to at least one TF convention, and my middle child (my princess) wants to watch Animated every day. They bring me great pride and joy. And stress  

 

Yup...made a conscience decision, and then my wife dropped the bomb on me...so the countdown begins. Oh and guess what? We're expecting our child ON THE OPENING DAY OF FREAKING TRANSFORMERS DOTM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I got a decision to make...lol!

 

My wife and I feel the same way. Too many things to do and not enough money to do it, much less with kids. Selfish? Yes. But at least we know it.

 

Yes.

 

My buddy refuses to have kids because the world is overpopulated.

 

I laugh when people say not having kids is selfish. Populating the world more, using more resources.. I don't have anything against people who have kids, and don't think they're destroying the planet.. but when someone who has kids tells a childless person that they're selfish I find it hilarious.

To be honest I don't want kids, and I've had no maternal instinct ever. Except for kittens and puppies. My inner furry shines through and through. Disappointing my parents yeaaah!

 

I love kids but for personal reasons I can't take care of them.

 

I have two and we have made the decision to stop there.

 

I have always wanted kids and hope to have some someday. I don't think that there is anything wrong with having or not having kids, since both options have pros and cons. I think it comes down to what matters most to the parties involved. I know that children will drain my resources and those of my partner, but the joy that they would bring me, and hopefully my partner, are worth it to me.

 

Kids are okay, but the expense, patience, and effort it takes to raise them have never made them appealing to me. I see all these tired, stressed out parents along with our overpopulated world and having kids becomes the last thing on my mind.

Were I to change my mind, I would think that adopting would do more good at this point than having my own progeny. There are a lot of kids out there that need good parents. Not so much the other way around.

 

I like this idea