Do The In-Laws Hate Your Transformers Collecting Hobby?

Discussion in 'Transformers Toy Discussion' started by GrimlockAutobot, Jan 28, 2010.

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Do Your In-laws/Future In-Laws Hate Your TF Collecting?

  1. My Husband/Wife's Family HATES My Transformers Collecting

    5 vote(s)
    7.5%
  2. My Husband/Wife's Family SUPPORTS My Transformers Collecting

    20 vote(s)
    29.9%
  3. My BoyFriend/Girlfriend's Family HATES My Transformers Collecting

    4 vote(s)
    6.0%
  4. My Boyfriend/Girlfriend's Family SUPPORTS My Transformers Collecting

    4 vote(s)
    6.0%
  5. I Have None Of The Above.

    34 vote(s)
    50.7%
  1. GrimlockAutobot

    GrimlockAutobot Me No Bozo Me King!!

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    Let me first say that my future wife and I are getting married this May. We already have two kids and we've been together for 6-going-on-7 years so, in may we'll be making things official.

    I've been a toy collector for 10 years now and I've always collected action figures during that time. 5 years ago I dumped all of my toys on ebay....When the Transformers Classics line came out in 2006, that got me hooked on TF collecting full-time.

    Since then, I've collected nothing but TFs. For the record I'm now 32 years old. My future-father-in-law HATES my Transformers collecting.

    He is at our house alot of the time and whenever a package comes to the house we get a comment to the effect of "Oh God not another one of those toys".(Even if the package has something other than TFs in it.) He also bitches to my fiance behind my back about my collecting which in-turn causes her stress.

    He usually says stuff to her like "Why does he have to spend money on all of these toys?" or "Why does he spend his money on that?" She usually tells him that it's my money and I can do what I want with it.

    Also, let me just say that nothing goes unpaid because of my collecting, the kids have food on the table etc. As a matter of fact, all of my TF collecting involves sales, clearance items, and extreme deals.

    So with all of that said, is anyone in the same boat as I am? Any nosy in-laws that hate your TF collecting?
     
  2. simplygriff

    simplygriff µ - Elitist Dick

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    Not an issue that I know of. If it was my wife would tell them to shove it cause she buys her own toys/stuff too. What does he spend his money on? To you, that could be considered just as silly and I'd tell him so.
    -G
     
  3. GrimlockAutobot

    GrimlockAutobot Me No Bozo Me King!!

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    He's big into horseracing as an owner so he spends what little money he has on that and also, for my future-sister-in-law to live a life away from home that is way beyond both of their means while she's away at college.
     
  4. Satomiblood

    Satomiblood Prototype Black

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    Why don't you confront him about it? If you have a job, the bills are paid, and your kids are being raised in a good home environment, then it's really none of his business what you do with that extra bit of money. God forbid someone enjoys anything.
     
  5. GrimlockAutobot

    GrimlockAutobot Me No Bozo Me King!!

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    Because my future wife asks me not to. I've had my run-ins with him in the past and she's asked me not to say anything to him about it. because she doesn't want there to be tension.

    She knows that it would be headed for a knock-down, drag-out argument and she doesn't want it to come to that also, the grandkids love him alot so it wouldn't do them any good to see him and daddy arguing.

    If I had my way I'd grab him by the back of the shirt and roll him down my front porch steps.
     
  6. Counterpunch?

    Counterpunch? Interior Renovator

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    They don't understand it, but they support and love me. So, it's a non issue. They think it's more funny than anything else, but they're really happy I married their daughter so, pretty much anything is good from their viewpoint.
     
  7. Satomiblood

    Satomiblood Prototype Black

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    I don't mean confront as in look for an argument or run-in. Just sit him down and explain that it bothers you. But I'm assuming that wouldn't go over so well, either.
     
  8. simplygriff

    simplygriff µ - Elitist Dick

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    Edit: Started typing this a few minutes before posting and subsequently after you posted :) ...

    I don't know that I'd confront him about it because that could cause undue stress on your fiance. I'd definitely start questioning his actions and stuff though. Especially if he's hanging out at your house and making snide comments. Not cool at all.
    -G
     
    Last edited: Jan 28, 2010
  9. Ops_was_a_truck

    Ops_was_a_truck JOOOLIE ANDREWWWWWS!!!!!!

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    My in-laws are kinda neutral on the issue. Pop-in-law owns several classic cars, so he has kinda accepted the fact that, yeah, while my hobby is a little more weird than his, it's still a hobby.

    Wifey has a bit more animosity about the collecting, but it's mostly a "that could have bought us new linens!" issue of frustration for her. Nothing major.
     
  10. GrimlockAutobot

    GrimlockAutobot Me No Bozo Me King!!

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    What you're saying is perfectly reasonable. I'm the type to try to diplomatically diffuse a situation by talking things out.

    He is a grumpy, older, old-fashioned gentleman who thinks that things go his way and his way only. I think the "Grumpy Old Men" movies were made with him in mind. There is no having a diplomatic, rational conversation with this guy.

    I wish it were that easy Satomi.
     
  11. katch26

    katch26 Well-Known Member

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    my father in law collects anything wizard of oz so no problem there
     
  12. Satomiblood

    Satomiblood Prototype Black

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    My girlfriend's mom knows I collect, but she's never seen them. She seems to be pretty cool with the notion. I haven't heard anything negative from her. My girlfriend hasn't relayed anything to me, either. I think it helps that she supervises a collector/customizer at her job.

    GA: Some people just love to hate. That's all.
     
  13. katch26

    katch26 Well-Known Member

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    either you talk to him and theres tension or you dont and theres tension.....pick your poison
     
  14. GrimlockAutobot

    GrimlockAutobot Me No Bozo Me King!!

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    Good point but here's the breakdown:

    Don't confront him=Tension with just HIM

    Confront him= Tension between him AND I, my fiance AND HIM, and my fiance AND me.

    See the dilemma?
     
  15. simplygriff

    simplygriff µ - Elitist Dick

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    In all seriousness I'd just kinda start poking fun at his horseracing stuff. "oh going to the track again eh..." "Oh gotta buy more feed huh. Man that thing eats a lot..." Just rib him back so he knows how it feels.
    -G
     
  16. Ceerad

    Ceerad Well-Known Member

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    I think I'm in that same boat.
     
  17. autobotblaster

    autobotblaster Y U NO!?!?!

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    and then theres the couch and no GA's happy time. i can see the dilema
     
  18. Ceasar121

    Ceasar121 Wants a Toxitron repaint!

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    And both of these comments underscore why whatever his viewpoint is, it matters for ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Horseracing? Seriously? I hope he's wealthy, because if he's not and he spends his money on horseracing, thats a fulltime job. Feeding the horses, caring for them, training them, finding jockeys... It's expensive as crap. Car collecting? Expensive as crap. I'd wager that either of those hobbies cost more in one year than you may spend in 5-10 years on Transformers, unless all you collect is MISB G1 stuff. Seriously, I'd leave it alone, but if he keeps making snide comments behind your back, you have to step to him. Otherwise it won't just stop with the toy collecting, it'll go other places. It also undermines your relationship with YOUR soon to be wife. Does he seriously think she's not telling you this stuff? And if he knows she is, he either needs to grow a pair and say it to your face, or or he's not comfortable enough around you to know how you'll react if he says it. Regardless of the situation if should be addressed, tactfully at first, and forcefully if need be.

    For the record, I'd deal with it... your fiance may get pissed at first, but guess what? Hiding one's head in the sand tends to never resolve the issue... Maybe this is not your girl's way, but women avoid confrontation ALOT. Maybe she thinks it will go away... but it probably won't and if you don't resolve it on your end now, while you're calm, it may eventually lead to a frustrated outburst or a snippy comment at the wrong time.

    Personally never had anyone not in my family say crap to me about to my face, or to my various girlfriends, so I'm not worried about. If you can't say it to my face, you're soft as far as I'm concerned, and your opinion doesn't matter.
     
  19. Counterpunch?

    Counterpunch? Interior Renovator

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    Or have horse-burgers for labor day cook outs.

    You know, whatever works.
     
  20. Razerwire

    Razerwire 99 Problems... Super Mod

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    My in laws probably don't look too highly on me spending so much money on collectibles. Neither do my parents I'm sure.

    But they respect that it's my money and that it's not digging into our livelihood. They also respect my wife and I enough to not bring it up when we're all together.

    There's plenty of stuff I can bring up about my parents, sisters, in laws but I don't need to. We all mutually respect each others decisions as long as it doesn't impact everyone else.

    I think your father in law has a serious case of not respecting you as an adult capable of making your own decisions. There's probably other reasons behind it like him thinking you, or any other male on earth that's not rich, is not worthy of his daughter.
     

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