Could I get opinions on my up coming comic?

Discussion in 'Comic Books and Graphic Novels' started by Nelomaxwell, Nov 21, 2018.

  1. Nelomaxwell

    Nelomaxwell Victory Prime.

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  2. Shattered Trousers

    Shattered Trousers That thing Ratchet needed.

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    Hey, there,

    What you've presented here looks quite polished, well done to you and your collaborators!

    Your artist brings a lot of consistency to the pages and a lot of variety in the panel blocking.

    I like the physical interaction between the two characters on page 18. Without any context it's hard to gauge the pacing of the scene, but going by the art alone it looks like it starts slow and steamy before the female lead pushes away from the male lead and the dialogue between them becomes heated.

    Page 19 appears to be filled with flirtation and possibly some frustration on the part of the male lead. Panel 4 reveals your artist is strongly influenced by Al Rio (or possibly by J. Scott Campbell and has taken the same stylistic cues from Campbell as Rio has.)

    The frequent changes in camera angle make the geography of the rooftop a bit difficult to get a grasp of, but it's not too distracting.

    The body language is much harder to read on pages 20 and 21 without any dialogue to aid the reader. The characters appear to have a familiarity with one another, but their interactions seem much more sterile without dialogue than the characters on pages 18 and 19.

    Page 21, panel 5 is troubling to me, because of the corner of the room. The ceiling indicates where the corner of the room should be, but the black line which looks like it should be the point where two walls meet is to the right of the corner of the ceiling.

    Screenshot_2018-11-22-16-45-44~01.png

    I thought, perhaps, the black line indicates a divide between the back wall and a darker coloured feature wall that doesn't reach all the way to the edge of the wall, but if that's the case the window on the left side wall is pushed right into the corner of the room, which isn't true to how windows are typically placed.

    I don't mean to nit-pick, it's just that the corner of the room is right in the reader's line of sight, so it's hard to overlook.

    Where can we look forward to seeing "Lawful Evil" (that is the title, yeah?) becoming available?
    Will it be coming out in comic stores, and available to order from Diamond? Or is it going to be self-published?

    Also, do you have a synopsis of what readers can expect this to be about, and what it will be similar to in tone?

    I hope my brief comments are helpful to you.

    ~L~
     
  3. Nelomaxwell

    Nelomaxwell Victory Prime.

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    Thank you for your feed back. Much appreciated truly.

    Lawful Evil will be available on Pateron and then on the Lawful Evil website once we finish building it.

    Synopsis:

    Jamal Jones is Dark Spider a C-list superhero in a world of people who don’t respect him. After catching his live in girlfriend cheating on him with his world’s strongest hero Primer, he is convinced by his arch-nemesis Suc-U-Babe to seek revenge and in doing so sets off a chain of events that put the world and his very soul in jeopardy.
     

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