Child-friendly live action movie?

Discussion in 'Transformers Movie Discussion' started by ryan.j, Sep 9, 2012.

  1. ryan.j

    ryan.j Well-Known Member

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    Harro.

    My 4 year old lad loves TFs and i'm okay with him watching some mild robot violence, providing i'm on hand to put it into context and point out it's clearly not real!

    However the films have a few bits that i'm less happy for him to see - the more graphic violence, or the few swearwords in particular. I've heard of this sort of thing for other films, abut are there fan-edits anywhere that cook any of the transformers films down from a 12 to a more timid PG?

    Im not asking for piracy links or anything, just to know if they exist. I've bought copies of all the films anyway so the other option was to just rip it myself and edit the film by hand but that'll take HOURS and i'm a busy boy :D 
     
  2. SouthtownKid

    SouthtownKid Headmaster

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    I think by the time you edit out all the many, many things in each movie that aren't appropriate for kids that age, you basically have the 45 second trailer.

    Believe me, I have nephews I would love to show a Transformers movie to, but the Bay movies just aren't that. I don't know of anything like that out there, and if you manage to make something like that which is inoffensive yet still coherent, I'd be fascinated to see it. Bay could open up a whole new audience to his movies if he put a little thought into doing something like this on his own.

    In the meantime, I think I'd stick to showing your 4 year-old Transformers Prime, if you haven't already. Even that can occasionally be kind of on the edge for a 4 year-old, but if you're there watching it with him and putting stuff in context, I don't think there's any harm.
     
  3. Avengers

    Avengers Banned

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    how about watching rescue bots.
     
  4. ryan.j

    ryan.j Well-Known Member

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    Yeah an episode of prime, a glass of lemonade and some pizza is our saturday-afternoon treat :D 

    The thing is being a little he has less than zero interest in the plot, such as it is, he likes the set-pieces and shrikes with excitement every time one of his favourite characters is on screen. He normally starts talking over any slower bits, asking questions about the characters. He's also pretty bright, can read and stuff, and likes to be challenged a bit.

    Thats what makes me wonder if a a heavily edited version of the movies or whatever might be pretty exciting for him. As for the length, he's 4! if i can get it down to about 45 mins that is going to be pushing his attention span to breaking point.

    edit: didn't even realize there was a rescue bots cartoon tbh. will give it a go, cheers!

    For the record he is a garden variety 'orrible little boy, and decided he likes shooting and explosions entirely of his own volition. At the moment he is jumping around the living room demonstrating his 'special moves' for me and his mum :D  The edited movie would be a big treat for him, not something to have on every morning or as some kind of automated parenting substitute.
     
  5. TFXProtector

    TFXProtector Well-Known Member

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    Sadly, your only option is Rescue Bots. G1 is too violent in some ways, plus it's just terribly cheesy. BW is violent, there's actual death and some of the humor is risque. ("Tickle my joystick" among some of those lines.) RID (2001) wasn't too bad. It was more slapstick and silly than anything. (That might work, actually.) The Unicron Trilogy (Armada, Energon, Cybertron) wasn't too bad, violence or content wise. Basically, from 2001 (RID) to 2006 (Cybertron) those years are your safe sweetspot. That and Rescue Bots.

    Bayverse is entirely inappropriate for children. There's no way to cut or edit the films to make them reasonable and still be coherent.

    Prime is too dark. I mean, we have Cliffjumper being killed in the pilot's opening minutes and then becoming a zombie, plus an army of zombies coming to kill us all and then you have Airachnid cutting the throat of Tailgate, plus... Well, you get the idea.

    It seems it's either feast or famine with Transformers. Famine: Violence, sexual content (which still mystifies me), darkness. Feast: Overly stupid, definitely for kids because it's SO watered down and goofy.

    Prime is closely in the middle, it can be accessible for older kids, and certainly adults, but it's still not quite what everyone is looking for. What we need is a Kreo cartoon, much like the Lego cartoons for Batman and Star Wars. It's accessible for adults, harmless for kids, and good/clean fun through and through. How very odd that a property for children isn't all that child friendly when you think about it.

    Go figure...
     
  6. QLRformer

    QLRformer Seeker

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    Well, the first film was meant to be kid-friendly. Perhaps you can give that a go.
     
  7. ryan.j

    ryan.j Well-Known Member

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    He quite likes the original G1 movie (he's a big fan of unicron and recently asked me for one - was thinking of picking up a junker for him to play with) but the g1 episodes haven't aged so well, he's got that shitty metrodome Classic Episodes DVD and is fairly unimpressed.

    He likes Prime, he really enjoys Transformers Animated. He's got a couple of Armada/Beastwars DVDs we randomly accumulated which are fine.

    So yeah - He is actually quite Transformers literate. I'm not short of transformers stuff to share with him, But he is also super-excited about the live action movies and woud love to be able to watch a (heavily cut version of) one.

    By the way - I think you're slightly overestimating how sensitive small boys are too, he started primary school this month and most of my primary school years were dedicated to enacting cartoon violence with my friends!
     
  8. TNG Prime

    TNG Prime TNG Prime IS a title!

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    Most kids that age are really into movie/TV violence.

    Anyway, as for a tip, the Cartoon Network screening edit of Transformers 1 had swears and sexual humor edited out entirely.
     
  9. Puck Hockey

    Puck Hockey Well-Known Member

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    Rescue Bots is really good. Surprisingly so.
     
  10. Ash from Carolina

    Ash from Carolina Junior Smeghead

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    There was a serious movement several years ago to offer family friendly edits of popular movies for the people who would want something like that. I'm not sure if any of them are still in business because Hollywood studios were determined to shut them down by any legal means they could.

    Off the top of my head I'm not sure if any of those companies got out any family friendly versions of the Transformers movies or how you would find them now.
     
  11. Hoptimus

    Hoptimus How I roll.

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    Hear hear, it's a favorite in my house. Not sure if you get The Hub in the UK, the station that carries it here in the US, but it's worth tracking down. IIRC there's DVD out. My boy is also 4 and he is huge on this show, sings the theme song while he plays with the toys, etc.

    Good luck and enjoy.
     
  12. Rusty24

    Rusty24 Well-Known Member

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    Take out the f words, the masturbating joke, and Simmons in a thong and I think the movies are fine for kids.
     
  13. Gingerchris

    Gingerchris Telly-headed Tyrant

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    The easiest thing is to just fast-forwards through the bits you think are unsuitable. Also, don't some players have an option to skip certain user-specified parts of a disc as it plays?

    It might also be interesting to shoot an email to Hasbro about this. Most likely they'll just tell you to try the Prime and Rescue Bots shows instead, but I don't see any harm in letting them know you can't show your kid a whole section of supporting media for a Hasbro children's toyline because you feel it's not actually suitable for kids. I believe BayFormers figures are stated as suitable for 'Ages three and up' but you felt the movie to go along with those toylines isn't suitable for your four year old. If the movie is as much there to help push the toyline as make cinema bank then in your particular case it's not really doing the best job it could do for younger kids.
     
  14. Autobot Burnout

    Autobot Burnout Hammer of the Gunplas

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    I'm afraid you're a bit out of luck there. G1 Unicron only exists in two different prototype forms, a big blue/yellow one that I think only three of which exist (two of them owned by Hasbro, not sure where the third one is but I heard a collector does somehow have it) and an even rarer Takara green/yellow one that AFAIK only has one prototype with a single documented photo proving it exists.

    Then there's the Armada Unicron variants. The most recent retool that actually is decorated to look like G1 movie Unicron (namely a more squat and rounded head) is a ridiculously expensive Takara release and is much more of a display piece for collectors instead of a toy. Then, the normal releases (original deco and the later, rarer Black Unicron from Energon) are pretty sturdily built but are also pretty heavy for Transformers toys and it may be difficult for a 4 year old to fully enjoy as the transformation requires partsforming the planet halves (which can be a pain to keep taking on and off) and a lot of the gimmicks with the toy involve the use of Mini-cons, of which Unicron only comes with one.

    That only leaves the Cybertron deluxe Unicron, but that one turns into a tank instead of a planet and may not be what your kid wants.

    Simmons in a thong was ROTF, but with that movie the thong thing is the LEAST problematic issue considering one of the first gags involves Sam's mom getting high on brownies and explicitly telling a bunch of passerby girls about her son's first sex experience.

    In comparison to the later two films, the 2007 film actually isn't THAT bad. I do agree that the more explicit swear scenes and "Sam's Happy Time" do need to be removed (I'd go so far as to remove the Bumble"pee" scene, too) if it's going to be shown to a kid not in their teens at the latest, but if the child in question can watch Prime (which has some pretty graphic moments like Cliffjumper getting killed over and over in increasingly violent ways and Starscream using human torture), then the movie probably won't be as bad. Just do not show him ROTF and DOTM until he's much older.
     
  15. ryan.j

    ryan.j Well-Known Member

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    Oh god no, I dont mean the ridiculous humpty dumpty looking never-released g1 unicron - Ive been around the fandom block a few times and I'm already well aware I cannot get him that ;) 

    I meant a cheap version of the one I've already got, that somebody has stripped for parts to complete theirs!

    I am planing on getting him one of those nice green ones you see in Japanese figure mags for Xmas though!*














    *nope :p 
     
  16. Gingerchris

    Gingerchris Telly-headed Tyrant

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    I see your location is the UK. You should hit up some car boot sales. I occasionally see Armada Unicrons going for a few quid at those if you're not too bothered about them being complete. Actually, take your kid along with you as car boot sales are a great place for finding all manner of TF stuff really cheap. :) 
     
  17. Mudflap2011

    Mudflap2011 Soldier

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    Well the movies are rated 12
     
  18. Constructor

    Constructor Witness my true form!

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    cartoon network has the first transformers movie,
    so they had to have edited it to a child-friendly level.
     
  19. WidowMaker91

    WidowMaker91 Well-Known Member

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    Are'nt these movies rated PG 13? Not something I'd show a 4 yr old.
     
  20. Mudflap2011

    Mudflap2011 Soldier

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    Plus the first 2 are fine, it's DOTM that has the worst swears. Sams boss looking at Bee and then saying "Fuckin' awesome" and Dylan mumbling about Megatron saying "He's such a dick!" and Roadbuster calling the engineer a "Nancy wanker" which Americans might not get it but "wanker" in the UK is an offensive word. I'm fine with swearing to be honest makes the movie not so childish
     

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