bank accounts and marriage...

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Lumpy, Mar 4, 2009.

  1. Lumpy

    Lumpy Taylor Swift Actionmaster Super Mod

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    so, my wife and i have been married for almost 2 years now, and have had 3 bank accounts, mine, hers and the joint account for all the bills...but lately we've been talking about combining our accounts into just one account. apparently lots of her friends just do it that way, and i guess it makes sense, but i'm just not 100% sold on it...i personally like having 3 accounts...i manage mine and the joint, and just make sure there's enough in the joint for our bills, then the other money stays in my account, which i use to buy groceries, or take us out to dinner, or buy my comics, gas or toys or whatever else is needed (or wanted)

    she manages her account, and just puts in her portion of the bills into the joint... so far its worked out pretty well, with the few exceptions of when she gets sick and misses a few hours of work, and i then put in extra into the joint to cover what she cant. or the even rarer occasion where she buys something before putting money in for bills, then i cover the difference...

    but how do you other married folks do it? any suggestions towards either way?
     
  2. yodafett

    yodafett Well-Known Member

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    My wife and I used to do the joint thing, until I realized how counter productive it is. Marriage isn't about "his portions" and "her portions". It's about being one unit. Doing things in "halves-ies" is just cohabitation/dating. You're married ("you" in a general sense, not you specifically, Lumpy). Act like it. Don't disrespect yourselves or your committment, it undercuts the very decision to be married.

    Just my $0.02
     
  3. seven

    seven RIP Poopers 4-1993/5-2008

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    Seperate checking accounts that are both tied into a single savings. Just seems easier to keep track of instead of having to have a meeting to figure out our balances. Also, the wife likes to shop a lot, not saying I don't blow a lot of money but I'd have even less if she had access to it.
     
  4. MidnightBliss

    MidnightBliss Well-Known Member

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    Joint. All the money into one pool. We work together to run the household.
     
  5. toma

    toma eskimo in disguise

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    my wife and i have been married almost 5 years and we still have the same old bank accounts as before. it's never really been a problem or anything... we know each others password and if one of us needs cash we just log into the other's account and do a transfer online... we're with the same bank so there's no fee... i dunno, we've never even thought about it.
     
  6. MegaMoonMan

    MegaMoonMan www.megamoonman.com TFW2005 Supporter

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    I opened a thread on this exact subject a few months ago - the wife wanted a single joint account, while I was fine with keeping two seperate accounts. We came to a compromise by agreeing to keep our seperate accounts and having one joint account that the majority of money went into.

    However, her interest in doing it seems to have died. Months after agreeing on it, it still hasn't happened. Personally, I could care less if it ever does or not. It's just not important - the bills get paid, and neither of us wants for money.

    Marraige isn't about combining/dividing bank accounts - does it really matter where the money is as long as you're honest with each other, support each other when needed, and take care of your combined responsibilities?

    P.S. Be wary of the "all my friends are doing it" argument. I've heard that BS far too many times only to find out it's not true at all, or at least highly exaggerated. Who cares if they are, anyway? Do what works for you both.
     
    Last edited: Mar 4, 2009
  7. Sangron

    Sangron Well-Known Member

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    I am the accountant 100%. Been married for more than 10 years. She has her account I have mine. But I manage both our accounts. I even have her atm card. But it has worked so far. She can ask me for any amount she wants for her personal reasons, i.e. hair, makeup, perfumes, clothes, jewelry.
     
  8. ams

    ams Generation All Veteran

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    Interesting... when my wife and I got married, I added her name to my account and she closed hers. Never considered doing it any other way.
     
  9. Pimpimus Prime

    Pimpimus Prime (┌∩┐(◣_◢)┌∩┐) TFW2005 Supporter

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    My wife and I have a joint account where most of my... errr our.. money goes each month. We also have individual accounts that we use for fun stuff (toys, computer crap, etc).
     
  10. jourdo

    jourdo TFW2005 Supporter

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    Everything we have is joint (basically one main account). It is just easier for us that way for us.
     
  11. Chaos Muffin

    Chaos Muffin Misadventure Veteran

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    < too scared to even try. Don't trust any woman, and they all get pissed off sometimes.

    Dont want my money in their bank when that happens

    I admire you all for being so brave though.
     
  12. Razerwire

    Razerwire 99 Problems... Super Mod

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    My wife and I both have our own personal accounts and one joined account. Never even considered just having one joined account with no personal ones.
     
  13. thenatureboywoo

    thenatureboywoo Veteran

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    My and my wife have been married for 9 years and have had a joint account the whole time. But whatever works for you is probably the best thing. Everyone here has an opinion and may tell you theirs is better. You and your wife need to sit down and figure out what is the best and why. After all none of us are married to your wife, you are.
     
  14. Aaron

    Aaron Master of Crystalocution Moderator Content Contributor

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    My wife and I have seperate accounts, and we each pay bills from our own accounts. It can be headache forming at times, but she's afraid of my toy buying, and I'm afraid of her pill paying.
     
  15. Nachtsider

    Nachtsider Banned

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    Joint account here.
     
  16. Chaos Muffin

    Chaos Muffin Misadventure Veteran

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    ^ haha Ak, so true, my toy collecting habits can get out of control. I may not be the best person to share accounts with. Women are still crazy though
     
  17. Gears

    Gears buh-buh-body ya Veteran

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    That /\. I've heard too many horror stories of one spouse cleaning out the joint account in a rage.
     
  18. Chaos Muffin

    Chaos Muffin Misadventure Veteran

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    Hell yeah, Im thinking it's just as wise to learn from other's mistakes.

    Oh, and why are all these divorced motherfu*&ers telling us to get married. :lol 
    All broke, financially raped and unhappy wanting me to share the misery ,so we'll be able to drink that brittle ass beershit they drink in our hidden 1bdrm apt.
    We've been together 9 years, that's already enough right there
     
  19. Foster

    Foster Super Mod

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    I've done it both ways. Paying overdraft fees because your bride won't be forthright with her spending is a sad-ass way to begin a marriage. The new wife is a lot more thrifty, but we still keep accounts seperate. That way money is always a proactive talk not a reactive one.

    Hell, I have accounts she doesn't even know about.
     
  20. DaraRex2.0

    DaraRex2.0 I'd totally eat the leaf

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    I'm not married but I prefer additional accounts for emergencies and what not, though it's easier for Id theft. That's what back up is for. But i agree with thenatureboy, you gotta talk with your wife and think about the benefits and ills of this thing.
     

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