Am i a bad person?

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Ghost Prime, Oct 7, 2007.

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  1. Ghost Prime

    Ghost Prime Banned

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    Ok about a week ago i made a thread about what my girlfriend had done to pur relationship and how basically shes turned out to be a physco bitch.
    Alot of people were kinda helpful in there words while others were just plain wierd...

    basically im torn in myself because i did something recently im not proud of and its messing me up inside. the short side of the story is after 2 years of living together my girlfriend cheated on me afew times and ended up addicted to cocaine and now says she no longer wants to be GF/\BF but still live together and have sex together.
    now all my friends ect just say that shes wanting someone to help her finacially because she has even said herself 'if you leave and take everything i know i will be bankrupt' so the fact shes said that before just makes me thing she wants to only keep me because im good for HER financially ect.

    ive not really been with her sexually and i felt pretty down recently and started talking to this older woman i know. im 25 and shes .....well she SAID 37 but it turns out shes 45. I went to see her because the fact is - she was nice to me - and it felt nice to feel wanted. I ended up having full on sex with this person unprotected (i cant wear condoms, they un-errect me and before you ask YES i have been to see Doctors about it) and now i feel really guilty?..........i feel like ive cheated on my gf..........well ex gf who i just screw once in awhile but for some reason still love with all my heart.

    i went to stay at this persons and all the time im with them all i can think about is my ex...i think about how much i miss her and how much i wish i was dead because i hate the fact were no longer together but still in the same house.
    If it wasnt for my job i would have left and gone back to my home-town the frist second my ex told me she started screwing around with arseholes shes spoken to for 5 minutes off the internet and then arranged to meet.

    my ex then started head-fucking with me because she starts calling me crying saying how shes finding everything hard and how she MIGHT give things another go (even tho its far FAR beyond that considering what shes done) and then she turns on me the second i say 'ok but we need to compramise on afew things' and i get the old jackle/hyde routine.

    I was ment to stay with this older woman for the weekend but she just moaned and complained so bloody much! i felt so bored on saturday night i could have had a more interesting time on the toilet having a slow poo rather than sit there with her and her friend Eddy talking about themselves and boring stuff they did in the past which they complained about.
    I kept feeling sick because they just bored me to tears, i did actually fall alseep because they were boring me so damn much. Anyways sunday comes and i say to her 'come with me into town and we can do alittle shopping and you can meet afew friends of mine' and shes alright with it.........until i have a shower..........?........... i get out of the shower and apparently im an arsehole because i didnt ask if she wanted to use the shower first? she then starts getting all pissy with me because its 11am by that time and she says ' oh town will be busy, i dont wana go now babe' and its a sunday and town is very quiet on a sunday. ive lived here like 21years of my life and shes only been here 1, i think i know alittle more than her.

    About 40minutes later im ready and im pretty much begging her to come out with me because all shes done for the whole of saturday night and most of the sunday morning is complain about how she DOES'NT go out. i figured if she went out then at least shes actually OUT and cant say she hasnt been out. yet still she refuses. i go out and just get constant messages off her saying when im coming back ect.
    i get fed up of this considering my ex has given me grief enough as it is so i figured i would see my friends - go to and 'all you can eat' chinese buffet and then get pissed in a bar.

    i get back to hers and surprise surpise! shes still fucking complaining and being pissy with me. now lets not forget i got the ungreatful bastard food from the supermarket + i cooked her and her friend dinner X2 nights in a row and she even said herself im the ONLY guy to ever make her have multipule orgasiums. yet the fact i invited her out with me didnt seem to cross her mind! to her i went out without her and im a jerk off!? i had enough and told her to piss off and grabbed my stuff and left.

    i went back to the house were im currently living with my ex.......anyways shes still being a bitch with me and i figured bollocks to it and told her i slept with someone else. truth is i wanted to hurt the bitch as much as she hurt me because i still love her even after everything bad that shes done.

    she then changed her story AGAIN and now tells me theres only been 1 person besides me thats penertraded her. it drives me mad tho because its the sick fuck whos been giving her cocaine and hes a twisted bastard with a pony tail who's with an unconvincing transexual for a gf who he whores out for money.
    when she told me it was him i almost hit her because im so angry.

    i already feel i need help because of what shes done ive found myself becoming very violent as i cant seem to control my temper anymore. i have alot of violent dreams now and my temper is very short with people and its because of her making something snap in my head. im scared of what shes turned me into because ive always tried to be a good and decent person....

    now ive told her what i did i still feel sick and ashamed of what ive done but what shes told me has angered me and sickened me so much worse. ive got alot of bad ideas going threw my head now and im not sure what to do about it.

    i just feel like im screwed either option i take
     
  2. Jeremy.B

    Jeremy.B Formerly Leader Blackout TFW2005 Supporter

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    Umm, IMO you need to break ties with both of them. The older woman was just because you felt ignored and unloved, and you wanted to be WANTED. It was fun now move on. And as for your ex, if she is into Coke, then she is majorly screwing with your mind. You need to cut ties with her as well, because she will literally torment your mind. Cut ties, move on, and remember the good times you two had and find a great girl that is closer to your age (so you will have more in common) and take it as a lesson learned. I feel for you in either case.
     
  3. Soundblaster1

    Soundblaster1 The Heisenberg of Toys

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    Ditch them both. (Yes I did read the whole thing)

    Older woman bores you to death and then bitches about it... No good
    Younger woman is leeching off you... No good there, either.

    Sure, you had good times with both of them, but when you look at the big picture, neither is very good.
     
  4. smkspy

    smkspy is one nice fucking kitty

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    I'd give you some advice, but it really wouldn't matter cause its already been said before in your numerous threads about this.

    Basicly, you are just a walking rug for every woman/boy/whatever that comes along, and they're willing to have sex with you.
     
  5. Gears

    Gears buh-buh-body ya Veteran

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    This is your third thread about this "girl." Obviously the advice from the TF fandom isn't helping. Maybe you should find a more professional counseling outlet.
     
  6. Draven

    Draven Banned

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    OK. At the risk of being a tad brutal about this:
    Your ex is a cokehead slut, and the old chick is a whinging bitch who is doing nothing but fucking you up even more.
    You don't need pathetic scumbags like that dragging you down bro. Stop acting like a doormat and take control of your life (emphasis on "YOUR LIFE" there).
    Tell them both to fuck off, get them the hell out of your life, and find someone who actually knows what the hell they want.
     
  7. Gnaw

    Gnaw Banned

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    These threads are always rated R. Honestly, I don't want to hear the words "penetrated", "erect" and "transsexual" on a Transformer site ever again.

    *leaves thread forever*
     
  8. Ghost Prime

    Ghost Prime Banned

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    well im not seeing the older woman anymore. i guess i was just on the rebound frommy ex but the thing is i still love my ex. ive been with over 100+ women since i turned 17 (im 24 now) and my ex has always felt different.
    shes always been my best friend but now it feels like no matter what i do i can never get back what i had with her before and i hate myself for it and i hate god for it because ive always tried to be a good person for him.

    it may sound strange but when i met my ex i started beliving in god. i even started to pray from time to time as well. sometimes he listened while other times he didnt. now tho it feels like he just doesnt care no matter what i ask of him.

    i feel like im in on my own on this and im just screwed up about it.....especially after tonight and after what she told me she did with that pony tail haired bastard. it fucking sickens me and makes me want to find him and cause him serious pain. i just feel like mentally shes braking me and making me become a bad person. i dont want to be a bad person because i want to be a good person and if god does exsist i want him to see im a good person and that i want better for myself and other people.

    im just so unsure what im ment to do in life. i know for sure if it wasnt for my job i would have just left months ago. my jobs very important to me tho, for one thing its the longest job ive ever had! all the jobs i had in my home-town i lost in about a month yet ive kept this one here for over 9 months now.

    i really miss what i had with my ex and everyday it feels like a small piece of me dies and i doubt anyone else can ever fill that void. i guess thats why i went with this older woman, to see if i could care about anyone else but it turns out i was wrong. i just wanted her to be my ex......i wanted her to do things my ex did and for her to satisfy me sexually like my ex did........instead i got bored to tears and moaned at (not in a good way tho) and i feel as if i made a huge mistake
     
  9. smkspy

    smkspy is one nice fucking kitty

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    wait...wait...You say you've been with over 100 women, but your fucking dumbstruck for your transsexual ex-boyfriend (and its your boyfriend not girlfriend sorry DICK=BF vagina=GF)?
     
  10. Ghost Prime

    Ghost Prime Banned

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    ok for starters yes i have been with over 100 or so women but i fail to see what that has to do with anything. i did do porn for a short while so that explains afew of the women but the rest are people who i thourght i had something with.

    as for my girlfriend (she has the operation to have women bits) yes i am star-struck by her because shes not like anyone else ive ever met. i love her with all my heart and she made me the happiest ive ever been in my entire life. now shes making me the sadest ive been in my entire life.........
    shes a girl and i find it pretty small minded you refer to her as a HE when she looks nothing at all like a boy.
    i posted a pic of her on here ages ago and you all said she looked hot and this was before i ever mentioned transexual to anyone.
     
  11. Grimlock_13

    Grimlock_13 Reformed Geewunner

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    Ok Ghost prime I'm sorry to be complete and utter asshole here since I know exactly what it's like to be hung up on someone, but all your threads sound the same. All the advice people here have given you is the same over and over again...if you're not going to take the advice you ask for, why keep on asking?

    It comes down to the fact that Peopl treating you like shit = not worth your time, no matter what they meant to you in the past.
     
  12. Hotspot17

    Hotspot17 Search and Rescue: Vet

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    You're in quite a pickle.
     
  13. Jeremy.B

    Jeremy.B Formerly Leader Blackout TFW2005 Supporter

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    Wow. I was the first to respond, and didn't realize all the drama behind. And I sure as hell didn't know anything about 100 women and 1 woMAN...scary...I'm washing my hands clean from this one....

    Wow...
     
  14. Soundblaster1

    Soundblaster1 The Heisenberg of Toys

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    He keeps asking because he thinks there's going to be someone that tells him to go back and pretend nothing happened. I've dealt with this type of thing before... I'm not trying to overstep my boundaries, but Ghost, GO SEE A SHRINK!!!! (read: I've been here before, none of us are going to be the light you're looking for so go get help. You have no problem opening up to us, so speaking to a professional shouldn't be any different.)
     
  15. McBradders

    McBradders James Franco Club! Moderator

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    Wow @ this thread.

    [​IMG]
     
  16. MegaMoonMan

    MegaMoonMan www.megamoonman.com TFW2005 Supporter

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    Oh good, another "alternate romance" fiction thread from GP. We should get these stickied, they make for a good read.

    It must be hard to keep track of all the details. So now you've done porn, huh? 100 REAL women? That's a good twist.

    Man, these threads have EVERYTHING. Drug addiction, porn stars, prostitution, sex changes, blaming deities, and adultery, all revolving around a relationship between two guys (one is a tranny) that has gone down the tubes.

    The craziest bit? One of those guys likes TFs - well, I'm assuming, since he keeps posting this stuff on a TF board.
     
    Last edited: Oct 7, 2007
  17. honestgabe

    honestgabe I

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    To answer your question. Yes, you are a bad person. You're horrible.
     
  18. Bryan

    Bryan ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ

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  19. ShortCircuit

    ShortCircuit Decepticon

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    Hey man you really gotta make the best out of it. Sooner or later something better will come along so you might as well fuck the brains outta your fallen star ho, or make the 40 year old fupa dyke out with you and her or somethin. Point is, don't get all upset about it. Youre probably kinda boring to your supernova bitch anyway so try and lighten up the party dude. Noone really likes the guy who sits in the corner at the party.

    Call your damn parents for goddsakes.
     
  20. Bryan

    Bryan ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ

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    This, for example, is comedy gold. Please, I have to hear an explanation of how someone with testicles is a woman.

    How do you even know all these transsexuals, anyways? We had a transsexual speaker in class one day (which was comedy gold, also, but real), and s/he said that there were only about 20K in the States. Can't be that many in the UK, then.

    Also, I would LOVE to see the picture, as I missed it the first time around.
     
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