Advice..

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Bumblebee765, May 31, 2012.

  1. Bumblebee765

    Bumblebee765 Wrecker

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    ...I need some. There's this girl I like, she's been my best friend since preschool, but lately she hasn't been talking to me for various reasons. She said that I cause "too much drama", and she won't talk to me because of how badly I handled my break-up with my previous girlfriend (who is also her close friend). There are times where she talks to me sparingly because her friends (who are also my friends) are trying to convince her to, but there are other times she doesn't say a word. It's really hard to show her that I really have changed since we don't really have any classes in school together. Worse, there's only three days left of school for us. All I can hope is for us to have a few classes together next year... I'm sure that would help a bunch in her becoming my best friend once more. :) 


    And if you're going to say "forget her" or "stick it in her pooper", don't. :wink: 
     
  2. Wolfguard

    Wolfguard Your own personal Jesus.

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    Girls don't like it when guys hover or grovel; with them, less is more.

    If you're going to seek her out before school's over, just wish her a great summer and be on your way. And yes, "forget her" for a while. There's NOTHING you can do to "make" someone change the way they're feeling. They have to work it out on their own, and sometimes taking charge and saying "laterz" for a bit is the motivation they need to get their marbles in order.

    If that doesn't work, then their friendship was never worth keeping or fighting for.
     
  3. Nachtsider

    Nachtsider Banned

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    If you're determined to patch things up with her, don't wait for opportunities to crop up at school. The fact that you've known her since preschool probably means that you have her contact details and know where she lives. Pay her a call; tell her that you're deeply sorry for all your transgressions and putting-off behaviour, that you've been making an effort to become a better person, and that she should grant herself the opportunity to see the results of said efforts. Tell her you've always valued her as a friend, and would be heartbroken if she cut herself out of your life.

    Failing that, stick it in her pooper, kill her and wear her skin.
     
  4. Haloid1177

    Haloid1177 Hey, That's Pretty Good

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    With the zombie plague looming over us, is this really that important?

    But seriously, breaking up with a girl who is your best friend's friend is a bitch to fix. Breaking up with the friend is almost as good as breaking up with the girl you were already friends with.
     
  5. Bumblebee765

    Bumblebee765 Wrecker

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    I think I'll try that! Thanks!
    This is also very good... I think I'll try this over the summer. I remembered I heard her say she wanted to see that Battleship movie when it came to the local theater, and I was planning on gathering some friends and going to see it there too, and one of the friends that wants to go with me and my friends is also her friend, so she may come along with us to that, and maybe after the movie would be a good opportunity.

    Also, I think I should clarify that I don't want to go out with her right now, I want to wait maybe two or three years (the reasons for my past two failed relationships were because we moved the relationship too fast). For right now I just want her to be my friend again. :wink: 
     
  6. Wreckgar

    Wreckgar Anthony Stark Veteran

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    It sounds like you are obsessing a bit. Maybe a little distance is a good idea. If you are constantly bugging her to be your friend again, it's just going to piss her off and make her more distant. Also, maybe she has some stuff going on and is just changing a bit. Either way, sit back a bit and kick it down a notch.
     
  7. transformervic1

    transformervic1 HI!

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    This. /thread.
     
  8. Bumblebee765

    Bumblebee765 Wrecker

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    I don't completely follow that last part... :lol 
    Yeah, that's what I plan to do for a little while, thanks for the reassurance! :) 

    Also, another reason she's upset with me that I forgot to mention in the original post is because I used to vent to her. Whenever I was upset about something I'd talk to her about it, but never gave her a chance to do the same to me (although she did every so often, and now I'd let her in a heartbeat.), so that's something I won't do again when she's my friend again. :wink: 
     
  9. transtrekkie

    transtrekkie On the level.

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    Friends help you move. REAL friends help you move bodies.

    If you guys really have been friends that long then she, as your friend, should be somewhat understanding that you've gone through a bit of a dick phase that is now over. Remind her of the history you have and tell her what her friendship means to you. Also, if one of her complaints is about not letting her vent, then make it clear that you know you weren't as good a friend as you probably should have been. Friendship (and really any relationship) is a two way street. If you vent to her, she should be able to vent to you. And if the venting is about you, then you should be man enough to take the criticism constructively and change youself for the better.
     
  10. Bumblebee765

    Bumblebee765 Wrecker

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    Thanks! I think once school starts again September I'll tell her all this. Who knows, maybe the time away in the summer will make her miss me! :D  I'll have to be sure to let her know that I don't mind letting her vent to me. Thanks again! :thumb 
     
  11. transtrekkie

    transtrekkie On the level.

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    Summer should not be capitalized unless it's a name or at the beginning of a sentence. I don't normally spelling nazi, but hey, you asked so I figured I'd answer.
     
  12. Bumblebee765

    Bumblebee765 Wrecker

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    Thanks! I'll go back and fix those! (I'm a big stickler for spelling. I don't call others out on it, but I will ask if I think I'm wrong :wink: )
     
  13. MetalRyde

    MetalRyde is an a-hole with a heart.

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    yeah, good luck with that.

    kids.
     
  14. TrueNomadSkies

    TrueNomadSkies Airachnid's ratservant

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    Seems like that girl's becoming a bitch, so whatever. Also, I think you've gotta ask yourself if she's actually been your best friend since Kindergarden, or whether she was someone who used to be your best friend in Kindergarden.

    There's kind of a difference there, and while I wouldn't suggest that you go outa your way to distance yourself from her, constantly being up her ass probably won't help. Give her a call like it was suggested & let her know that you're not vanishing just because school's ending, but don't hound the girl, and if she ends up turning full on bitch later on, then I'm sorry, but it happens.
     
  15. Aernaroth

    Aernaroth <b><font color=blue>I voted for Super_Megatron and Veteran

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    Well, did you cause a lot of drama for her? Be honest. It's possible she just got fed up with being your shoulder to cry on. And the fact that you're ruling out "forget about her" explicitly in your opening post doesn't bode well for you not coming off as "clingy". Could be the damage is done, as you can't make her want to have contact with you, and the harder you try, the worse you're making the problem. Could be youve already made it a lot worse by pushing before you made this thread.

    By breaking up with her friend AND making her your shoulder to cry on, you put her in a really awkward situation, where you were complaining about your relationship with HER FRIEND, and it's very likely her friend was doing the same. She may resent you for pulling her in two directions like that.
     
    Last edited: May 31, 2012
  16. TrueNomadSkies

    TrueNomadSkies Airachnid's ratservant

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    Yeah, I've been in that situation before & it blows pretty hard, especially when you're good friends with both people involved & you don't wanna pick sides.
     
  17. FatalT 71

    FatalT 71 Mr. JazzHunter

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    It sounds like some time spent apart for a while may be for the best for you. Hopefully things will work out in your favor and when you both return after the summer break, things will be better than they are now and the lines of communication will be open.

    Don't worry, brother. Things will get better, we've all been there and done that. It's just your turn.
     
  18. Deceptikitty

    Deceptikitty all about the hasubandos

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    Anal sex.
     
  19. Aernaroth

    Aernaroth <b><font color=blue>I voted for Super_Megatron and Veteran

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    I dunno, OP seems pretty butthurt as it is.
     
  20. TrueNomadSkies

    TrueNomadSkies Airachnid's ratservant

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    [​IMG]
     

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