Optimus Sledge
Last Activity:
Jun 23, 2010
Joined:
Jun 10, 2008
Posts:
7,915
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176
Positive ratings received:
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Optimus Sledge

Yar har fiddle di dee, 45

Optimus Sledge was last seen:
Jun 23, 2010
    1. Underwear
      Underwear
      What happened to you? Are u even alive?
    2. Razorclaw
      Razorclaw
      Where you Sledge? I'm looking for you to find you.
    3. Spiderus Prime
      Spiderus Prime
      Were are Optimus Sledge?
    4. Underwear
      Underwear
      Whatever happened to your church & your lame sidekick Spoon?
    5. ironjazz
      ironjazz
      are you dead?
    6. bumblebot98
      bumblebot98
      Are you dead? You've been offline for like, 2 years now...
    7. Razorclaw
      Razorclaw
      You're...like...back?
    8. Waverider
      Waverider
      Welcome back!
    9. Tacitron
      Tacitron
      Glad you're back!
    10. FanimusMaximus
      FanimusMaximus
      Are you dead?
    11. NGW
      NGW
      We miss ya maing
    12. Sage o' G-fruit
      Sage o' G-fruit
      YouTube - Handel - Messiah - Hallelujah Chorus
    13. Riltht
      Riltht
      Alas here lies poor Sledge, dead for two months.
    14. DJbobby
      DJbobby
      Something that made my day
      The TFW2005 Story




      Chapter 1: Kickback and Freshdebesh

      Kickback is a homosexual Administartor who likes to lick on mens ass's, he also loves to suck on his own cock, but since he is a midge in a tall man suit, he has an extreme difficulty
      trying to blow his herpees infested PINGAS. He however has analfishes the size of manhatan, mainly due to the butal ass molestations of various preists over his childhood.
      Kickback was raised by nomes, evil ass fucking nomes, who molested his fanny untill he masterbated his own seamen, that evolved into Derrik J Wyatt, just look at his face,
      you can notice the morbid abount of blubber on his face. And the splooge that drools from his lips.
      One night kickback was in a gay stripjoint. He ordered a gay ass apple-teenie, brought to him by a tall nice muscley black man, named freshdebesh. They began talking for a while, mainly about cocks and balls, untill freshdebesh invited kickback over to his penthouse to watch his favorite homoerotic movie, Known as, Brokeback montain. Then immediatly, while in the middle of the film, kickback got so horney, he instatly started stroking off freshdebesh's dick, and it lead into them analy abusing eachother untill the cops were called due to a gay noise complaint. The cops...sadly joined in, and shit was getting real. Then One night when they were enjoying a shower together, kickback looked at freshdebesh with his cock in his hand and said, "Freshdebesh, i have something to tell you" Freshdebesh asked what, and Kickback said, "I have gay ass cayote aids, i got it from gogdog, and now you have it, because we have done it in every part of your body possible. I'm sorry, now you have gay ass cayote aids" Then derrick j wyatt came in with his face dripping with splooge and said,
      "BUT THAT MEANS I ALSO HAVE GAYASS CAYOTE AIDS, ALONG WITH MICHAEL BAY, AND THE WHOLE TFW STAFF!!!!!!!"


      Chapter 2: Gogdog, and what he did to tfw.

      Gogdog was analy abused by a pack of cayotes as a 12 year old. These were no ordinary cayotes, they were mutant cayotes, with monster cocks. Gogdog grew up to love the splooge, cayote splooge. Then something tradgic happend, his gay cayote parents died of gayass cayote aids. Gogdog was depressed and was sucking off homeless guys just to get his homosexual pleasure. He soon met, Kickback and Freshdebesh, and was the happiest transvestite in the world. They soon all decided to go to chuck e' cheeses and have gay sex in the ball-pit.The children saw and those children were know as:

      NIBMratchet
      twintwist
      Sol Fury
      Super_Megatron
      Tim Formas
      Tony Bacala
      ALPHAMAGNUS
      autobotx23
      BMGFX
      Dinobot Nuva
      Drew Eiden
      Liokaiser
      Nemesis Predaking
      plowking
      Primal
      Primus
      Seth Buzzard
      Shane Anderson
      shibamura_prime
      Shin Densetsu
      Superquad7
      TFWNEWS
      TM2 D-bot
      Vangelus
      XJunky
      Deefuzz
      DESTRO
      Fosterlager
      Gears
      Razerwire
      Shin Densetsu
      Sol Fury
      soundwaveCA
      Tim Formas
      TM2 D-bot
      XJunky
      Boardwise
      Deefuzz
      Gears
      Joe Moore
      Razerwire
      REDLINE
      soundwaveCA


      Chapter 3: "The Fail Boat"

      The fail boat is a touching homoerotic movie with two young men, confused and looking for what they need in life. But they never knew eachother. One day they both decided that they were taking a cruise, to take their minds off of their gay ass lives and met eachother on the boat, and became gay partners that night, in front of the entire crew. They penetrated, dececrated, annihilated, complicated, and masterbated eachother untill their cocks fell off. Freshdebesh and kickback make cameos in the movie as gay crack dealers with british accents that drive pink prius's. The word is that there will be a part two to the movie, based on their lives together from the past. They will mention things like their odd obsesion and love for catholic priests, tony little workout videos, and john turturro gay porn videos they drool over online.


      Chapter 4: Michael Bay, And his gay lover, Derrik J. Wyatt

      Because Derrik J. wyatt became increadably jelous of kickback and freshdebesh's lives, he decided to go to the intertainment industry to find, the godamned Michael Bay. Derrik J. Wyatt accidently spilled a tall glass of warm splooge infected with gay ass cayote aids, on Michael bays favorite shoes. Michael bay insited that he cleaned it off with his mouth, not only because it would turn him on, but he couldn't wait to pork his fat ass with a optimus prime helmet on. But that was only a fantasy, untill he asked him to be his gay ass motherfucking parter, he could only dream of derrik j wyatt, breathing on his ass hole, and sheltering him in his blubber. They soon started production on a soap opra entitled, Ass Pirates with hemroids: Ther series. Starring Shia Labouf as the gay ass hitman, bent on cock, as Gogdog stars in it as well, as sexy portarican transvesite, that hosts a show called: Its not mine, if its not frilly! Michael Bay and D.J.W. were so succesfull with their serise that Kickback and Freshdebsh insited that they star in it, and even bribed them with homosexual experiences.

      Chapter 5: The Aftermath

      They all lost their jobs due to homofobic neo-nazis. They all had no choice but to become gay ass potatoe farmers together. (You can guess what they did with the potatoes...)

      The end.



      In memory of all the fallen heroes, cocksuckers & crackpots on TFW.
    15. KingGrimlock
      KingGrimlock
      YouTube - Lada Gaga's Poker Face read by Christopher Walken - Friday Night with Jonathan Ross - BBC One
    16. Sage o' G-fruit
      Sage o' G-fruit
      Where have you gone, Optimus Sledge?
      A forum turns its lonely eyes to you. Woo, woo, woo.
    17. Atlas Prime
      Atlas Prime
      Do what you want cause a pirate is free. YOU ARE A PIRATE
    18. Human Beastbox
      Human Beastbox
      Is that new avatar Capt. Feathersword by chance?
    19. Sage o' G-fruit
      Sage o' G-fruit
      Your posts are becoming increasingly disturbing.
    20. Sage o' G-fruit
      Sage o' G-fruit
      How again did you acquire these balls of death.
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  • About

    Birthday:
    Aug 15, 1978 (Age: 45)

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    The perfect haiku would have just two syllables: Airwolf.